Pensions

[Ilovetheseventies]

So my DH and I split up and are legally separated. We both have superan pensions and when we split up we just halved the proceeds from the house and bought our own places. We have three children.
So he worked full time for 20 years.
I worked full time for 5 years then part time for 14 years. (I then left the NHS, he got sacked although will still get his pension) If I make a claim on his pension I take it he can make a claim on mine. Has anyone any advice experience of this. We will both get our pensions at 60 as its protected.

If pensions are substantial then you get a pensions qualified IFA -they value all pensions and then they are split according to what you or the court agree.

Ours were split 50:50 which meant ex had to transfer me some pension assets. My current employer's pension scheme wouldnt accept the transfer so I had to open a SIPP.

Our first pensions person got our consents, received all the information and then refused to complete the report. Family Court judge not impressed, neither were we. Had to start again.

Some people offset house costs and pension. Sounds as if you are already partly down that road so might need to deal with pensions on their own. Worth doing though - my ex had more DB rather than DC.

So do you have to go to a solicitor. My DH really refused to discuss anything. He gave me £5000 to get a new car although we sold the old one for £12,000.
He gives me nothing for my youngest she lives with me but I think that's OK because my other two DS s live with him one is working so pays his way.
So when we split things we're just sorted like this.
The other day I thought when I retire I'm really not going to have much to live on so should really find out if I'm entitled to anything.

I would because any divorce will require this to be finalised. It is just an asset like any other.

You may both agree not to do anything with pensions but it sounds unbalanced from your OP. Particularly if you worked part-time to accommodate children.

Please consider as well that any future spouse of either of you may benefit from your pension, rather than your children. So again best perhaps to finalise this.

The pensions consultant we used cost a few thousand but the pension pots were both large, and we each had a few pensions. In hindsight having seen how atrocious my ex-husband has been towards me I am delighted that the pensions were a clean split at 50:50. It means I keep that regardless of his behaviour.

You give the example of poor conduct over the car. My ex, after he left me bought a very high value car - cash deposit and then a car loan. The family court, and even my own barrister, didnt think it unreasonable that the deposit be shared as an asset so I had to pay 50% of that man's car deposit. A decision he took, after legal separation, without my knowledge, and he already had a car. The loan also came up as possibly a joint liability. Fuck off was my reply to that and thankfully common sense prevailed. So please take his behaviour and conduct over the car as a warning to future conduct. Your children sound older - once there are no children (below adult age) - financially things might be more difficult. I would get the finances resolved as soon as possible.