What to do about really bad financial situation?

[ifeeldone]

I'm actually worried sick.

Two years ago, H decided to take a loan out from the bank- we still owe 10k on it. Due to H deciding he needed a holiday last month, we're 3k into his overdraft (limit is 2k) so we're getting charged for that. I get paid on the 20th every month (unless it's a Sunday in which case it's the 19th) so it's a long way until payday and I don't know what his overdraft will be like at that point (I say his because we have separate accounts but pay for things together). I have £7 in my purse and £15 in my account (child benefit on Monday hopefully). I just don't know what to do. We live with family so no house to lose but our bills are £700 a month (rent, electricity etc and there's no leeway). Also, we're most likely splitting up- what happens then? Has anyone been in similar circumstances and if so, what did you do? Any advice appreciated. TIA.

Did you guarantee his over draft? Probably not but it might be worth making sure you have a bank account with a totally different bank from him so there is no risk the bank will not take money from your account for his debt.

if H is a husband not just a live in partner then make sure when you divorce that you have a signed court sealed financial consent order so you both know where you stand on money after the divorce.

When you say you are getting charged for his overdraft you mean he is getting charged for it as you said you had separate accounts. Do you have any joint accounts or joint credit cards?

Youl say we owe £10k on the bank account so does that mean you both took out that loan as a joint thing or is it just in his name?

Do you live with his family or yours? Relevant if you are about to be homeless if you split up.

On the emergency money issue could you try to get some night shifts at a pub or other extra work for the next few days?

The way you describe your finances is quite complicated - do you have separate accounts with separate banks? Is the loan in joint names or just in his name?

Whose relatives are they for the house you live in? You will need to speak to them if you cannot pay the rent.

Do you have children, or is it just you?

If you split up someone will need to move out, possibly both of you if neither can afford the rent separately.

If you can give some more details then you'll get better help.

He made you go into your overdraft limit cos he fancied a holiday

You have some serious spending issues but yes separating sounds good

Are you married? But I would say if only his names are on it its his issue

1. Whose family own house you’re in?
2. Who actually has their name on the loan?
3. Is the overdraft solely his? (you say it’s his and you have separate accounts)
4. Do you have any other assets? (possibly not as you are renting and are in debt, but there may be pensions to consider)
5. How much do you want to end this relationship?

It sounds like the debt is all in his name. I’m going to guess that the family providing housing is his, and that’s why you haven’t already split up?

You should speak to CAB about what you would be entitled to (benefits) if you split up, and what would be your priority re housing. Do you earn enough and could pay rent? Do you want to present as homeless and be put on a housing list? You have children, and if the house belongs to him family, then you might be priority homeless - you need to find that out.

Once you’ve split up, you divorce and make a financial agreement. Until that happens, if the debt is in HIS name, they can only chase him. You may think that all assets / debt are marital. That’s true to a certain extent - in that, a court could agree to spread them. But in the first instance, here and now, the only person the lender can chase or penalise is the one who took out the loan.

There are no hard and fast rules in financial settlement. You can argue the debt all stays with him, because you didn’t want the loan. How a judge would find, might depend on how it was spent. On rent for you both, is different than if it went on a flashy car that only he drives! Even then, he’d have to take you to court to share the debt.

Your first action is to take a deep breath - there’s always a way out. Your second is to contact CAB.

You would do well to get rid of this spendthrift.

OK, have read one of your other threads, and the situation is complicated. I’m sure you’re struggling right now.

You are living with his parents, unless you mean in a separate property owned by them, then £700 seems like a lot of money in rent. Are you that’s right? As in, you’re paying it to them directly? I wonder if you’re paying it to him, and he’s lying. If you don’t have money for food, don’t pay the rent. Tell him to take it up with mummy and daddy. You reckon if you left, they be taking £700 off him?

You need to speak to a solicitor about splitting up.

@Quartz2208 sorry, what makes you think that I have spending issues?

Sorry I don’t think you do I think he does

@ifeeldone I’ve also had a look at one of your threads. You are in a terrible controlling relationship and the bottom line is you need to get out. Although he is currently SAHP your DC are quite young and that has not always been the case so I think your worries over him ‘taking’ the DC are unfounded. If you’ve been offered council accommodation- despite that it is a long way from where you currently live - that might be your best option.

1. I would not pay rent to his family at all. Tell them your DH spent it on holidays etc.
2. See if CAB can help you or if a family solicitor will give you a 30 minute consultation.
3. Stop believing it trusting your husband in anything.