How did your outgoings change when you became a parent?

[QueenOfThePumpkins]

Hi everyone,

I'm currently pregnant with twins, and am trying to prepare as best I can for the financial side of things! I am pretty good at budgeting and have (hopefully) covered most bases, but would like some ideas of things I might not have thought of. We've got plenty of savings to cover the one-off expenses, but it's regular weekly/monthly bills I'm most interested in. For example, I've increased our utilities budget by £30 per month as I know there will be lots of extra washing, heating etc. I plan to be a SAHM so no childcare costs to factor in, only loss of income.

Thanks in advance for any thoughts or advice :)

Our socialising spend decreased significantly as did spending on things like clothes and haircuts.

Our food spend reduced slightly as I had more time to shop around and cook from scratch. Obviously this then goes up again when they start eating!

I live in the Midlands and spent around £80 per month on baby classes, toddler groups, nice biscuits to take round to visit friends etc. This is a discretionary spend and easy to reduce it it's not affordable.

Our gas and electric bill is around £85 pcm for gas and electric for a small 4 bed detached 1930s house. We are never cold.

Same as roz. We went from a meal out / cinema weekly to nothing for 6 months and then every two months, if that.

A few more random incidental expenses for big ticket baby stuff.

I tend to do free things with DD so not much in the way of classes etc (I’ve just never found anything worthwhile, and there’s so much great free stuff nearby).

@EssentialHummus I should add that the £80 a month included (extortionate) baby swimming - Puddles Ducks? It was about £12 a week. I mean the pool was lovely and warm but we could have gone to the leisure centre's parent and baby sessions for £3, definitely entertaining yourself and baby can be done fairly cheaply.

The main thing I hadn't factored in was the number of "one off" expenses. There seem to be a lot of unplanned things and emergencies with kids. Nearly every month I have to buy something I hadn't even considered I'd need the month before IYSWIM

I generally did free or cheap stuff with the babies - bounce and rhyme at the library, free swimming sessions at local pool, children's centre baby massage etc. I can't believe the price of things like Baby Sensory!

My food spending went up as I stopped going to places like Aldi and getting home delivery from tesco instead as I just couldn't face the logistics. I also bought more quick and easy things like fresh pasta and preprepared sauces and nice soups etc as my ability to plan ahead and prep veg etc was reduced for a while. I also hosted more so had 'naice' biscuits and coffee etc to hand. That said, we never ever ate out again for years so it's probably all equal!

Travel costs went down as I couldn't get out and about as much, and I frequently used public transport in preference as I didn't feel safe driving when exhausted and it was easier to feed/settle babies if on bus or train.

I threw money at some stuff when the going was hard ie cleaner, dog walker, ironing lady, car valeting... Paying other people to do things I normally would but couldn't cope with with small babies (one ill/in hospital a lot) and that turned out expensive but necessary for my mh at times.

Going forwards the costs of having dc are terrifying!! School shoes, swimming/music lessons, childcare and loss of earnings are the biggest factors for us, plus bigger mortgage and bigger cars.

But having dc is not a financially based decision and many expenses are a choice. Good luck!

When they get to 4 and 5 you need to buy a new pair of shoes for them every 4 months. Coats etc... add up too. Activities too.

My finances reduced when I was sahm. No or little petrol costs. No new work clothes. No meals out. Park trips and baby groups are virtually pennies. What you need to not do if your on a budget is meet for lunches out and spend days shopping its a waste of money. When you meet friends with babies meet at your house and buy some cakes rather than all meet at Costa for example. It's also easier with babies. I was able to plan ahead and home cook meals so our shopping reduced. Bills weren't that much more. I would layer up at home as I don't like having heating on all day as it really dries my skin. Holidays can be cheaper too as you probably won't want to do anything too posh with baby twins but I might be wrong. I was able to spend time feeding babies and shopping for deals online for Xmas and birthday gifts. Good luck.

Some changes we've had over the 3 years since our son was born:

Used to get £100 a week pocket money each, now get £50 each saving £100 a week

I used to spend £40 a week on fuel to get to work which went down to roughly £5 a week on maternity leave and is now £10 a week as I work from home saving £30 a week

Used to spend about £200 a month on take aways and eating out every month, now spend around £80 a month saving £120 a month

Used to spend about £80 a week on the shop buying easy stuff as we both worked full time and less time to cook, now spend about £70 a week saving £10 a week

Used to spend about £60 a month on gym memberships we never used, now spend nothing on them and just go for walks and to the park saving £60 a month

Used to not have a childs birthday and Christmas to pay for, clothes, toys, entertainment, playgroup, pull ups, wipes, toiletries, replacing many broken items in the house etc! Which I can't put a figure on but I would say our son 'costs us' around £300 a month to pay his playgroup, get him clothes, take him out, buy toys and presents etc.

So overall we have actually saved having a child! He will get more expensive though as he gets older. Right now we can get away with buying him a £20 pair of trainers and clothes from sainsburys/asda/matalan/next sale etc but as he gets older, he will need clothes with a bit quality to them, same with shoes and trainers. He will also have school meals or packed lunch, school trips and uniform etc but hopefully by then I will be working more, maybe double the hours I do now

Thanks for the responses everyone, you've been really helpful :)
It sounds like things should roughly balance out, which is what I was hoping!