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Original poster

Parent leaving money in a will to sibling's children

50 replies

Rocketman4980 · 22/05/2019 17:32

This didn't really bother me until it came up in conversation with a friend and she said she thinks it's unfair, but my dad has made out his will so that part of it will go to his two grandsons, my nephews and the rest divided between me and my brother. I don't have any children.

What do people here think?

OP posts:

Winebottle · 22/05/2019 19:47

I think it is fair provided the grandchildren don't get less than you.

It is a way of ensuring the wealth is passed down the generations. I will leave mine divided equally between all decedents.

I want to leave something for my grandchildren (if I have them) because there is no guarantee their parents will pass anything on. I also don't see why parents should be disadvantaged for having kids.

I think you an uneven distribution between children could cause resentment also.

Your friends attitude is as if you have already counted out your half. Would you be annoyed if they made a donation to charity because some of it would come out of your half.

Teddybear45 · 22/05/2019 19:48

In this situation it seems like the ‘legacy’ of your family will be your brother’s family, so I can understand why your father wants to leave them the lions share of the money. If you died without being married (or kids) your brother’s kids would your next of kin too — so eventually all the money goes to them anyway.

Millie2018 · 22/05/2019 19:51

I’m fairly sure my sibling had a child just to ensure an equal cut of the will 😂

00100001 · 22/05/2019 19:59

What's not fair about it?

Inheritance is £100...let's say each person get the following
GC1gets £15
GC2gets £15
DC1 gets £40
DC2 gets £40

All GC inherit same, all DC inherit same.

Or are you saying all parties should get £25?

Or GC get a share of £50?
So for example
GC1 gets £10
GC2 gets £10
DC1 Gets £30
OP gets £50

HollowTalk · 23/05/2019 10:21

I think she's suggesting a 50-50 split between the adult children.

00100001 · 23/05/2019 13:05

"I think she's suggesting a 50-50 split between the adult children."

greedy!

HollowTalk · 23/05/2019 13:54

Well not in a way - it can be much easier if parents just leave money to their own children, leaving them to share it out between the grandchildren if they like.

JoJoSM2 · 23/05/2019 15:19

I don't think it's unfair. It' s the grandchildren that will need the money the most for education, house deposits etc. If

Tavannach · 23/05/2019 15:25

Knowing my brother, I can't see him being so accommodating if the situation were reversed.

That's his problem, don't make it yours.
The grandchildren don't belong to your brother. They're his descendants and, more to the point, your father's descendants.

00100001 · 23/05/2019 16:13

If the the person wants their GC to have an inheritance, what is fair is each GC (Present or future) gets an equal percentage (say 5%)
The remainder gets split 50/50 between the siblings.

UCOinanOCG · 23/05/2019 16:17

That's how my parents have sorted their will. 1/3 to each to me and my DB and 1/3 to shared between the grandchildren. Seems fair.

Sculpin · 23/05/2019 16:21

I think this is completely fair.

If you die childless, you will presumably either leave your money to your partner or to your nephews if they’re your closest relatives. So at that point, either this money goes out of the family (I can see why your parents would like to prevent that) or it ends up with the same nephews anyway, but just a bit later.

TixieLix · 23/05/2019 16:26

My parents have done the same. They've ringfenced a certain amount (in ISAs) to go to my two adult children. The rest of the estate is to be divided equally between me and my brother. My brother doesn't have children. I'm obviously fine with it, but if it was the other way and my brother had children and I didn't, I'd still be fine with it, because all four of us are their direct descendants, albeit two are the next generation.

Rightwayup · 23/05/2019 16:36

What if a person really wanted children and couldn't have them. Their sibling with a child then decided to do bugger all helping with parents as they have a child don't you know. ....and then puts the pressure on for a 3 way split to include their child? No I think 50/50 to adult children. Those who have children can then split their share of they wish

Itsagrandoldteam · 23/05/2019 16:45

When my in laws made their will, the solicitor actually advised them not to leave money to their grandchildren, but to just leave it to their children. In case any more grandchildren arrived later.

Tavannach · 23/05/2019 16:50

But the estate doesn't belong to the beneficiary. It is up the person making the will who or which charity benefits from their estate. No-one else has a say in this. It's not an entitlement.

Sculpin · 23/05/2019 20:44

My parents will leave some money to their grandchildren and the remainder is split evenly between me and my brother. Their thinking is that the grandchildren will benefit more from it in the next few years rather than waiting for their parents to pass it on down.

Kazzyhoward · 24/05/2019 08:15

Depends on whether his children need the money. It's more common these days for wills to skip a generation where the grandparents consider that their own children are established and don't actually need the money, so pass to the grandchildren instead as it's now widely realised that today's children are going to be worse off generally than their parents due to student loans, higher house prices, lower wages, higher taxes, and having to save for their own pensions given few people expect today's children to get state pension.

My mother left her money equally between me and my brother, but I didn't "need" it, so I immediately set up a trust for our son and put it all in there so it will benefit him. I really struggled with a low paid job, financing my own professional qualifications, saved for years for a deposit for a house etc. - I'd have really benefitted from a windfall in my 20's but in reality, I was in my late 40's and settled, so I just didn't need my mother's inheritance whereas I know my son will need it.

BogstandardBelle · 29/05/2019 07:45

M’y parents have done the same: 10k each to each of my children, the rest to be split btw my sister and I.

She was pretty unhappy about it Tbh, and I can see her point, because up until their last will update they had always split it equally btw us. But I can also see my parents POV: they love their grandsons to bits, and want to do this for them.

They are still alive btw so who knows what will actually happen!

Mintlegs · 29/05/2019 07:48

Is she not leaving anything to her own children but just the grandchildren?

GinUnicorn · 29/05/2019 07:59

I think it’s a nice thing to include the grandchildren. If you weren’t bothered before I’d be inclined to let this one go.

Maryjoyce · 29/05/2019 08:05

Good adding up lol

stucknoue · 29/05/2019 08:09

My parents have money left for my kids but my brothers don't have any. I think it's quite normal. As my DD's are the beneficiaries of both my brothers wills too I don't think they care plus we want to keep our parents alive! There's at least a decent chance all the equity in the house will end up being used for care home fees one day

ourkidmolly · 29/05/2019 08:14

I think it's fairer to have an equal split among children and not involve grandchildren. Of course there's always exceptions such as when there's incapacity or death of the child.

ItsAllGone19 · 29/05/2019 08:32

I'd see this as a lack of trust in your brother to leave inheritance for his children. Your dad is guaranteeing that your nephews have some sort of inheritance from the family rather than relying on your brother to split his estate fairly or to have an estate to split

Both my husband's and my parents have made similar provisions because of our siblings.

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