Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Money matters

Find financial and money-saving discussions including debt and pension chat on our Money forum. If you're looking for ways to make your money to go further, sign up to our Moneysaver emails here.

Original poster

Student daughter owes 8 months rent

31 replies

triplets · 19/04/2019 23:07

Long story but my daughter shared a house last year and got in with a bad crowd. The landlady was on the point of evicting them. My daughter took off with one of the boys and out of the blue cut us, all her family and friends out of her life. That was 18 months ago. We contacted the university welfare team and were told she is an adult, nothing they could do. The ex landlady then sent me a bill for damages which I settled. So for 18 months we had not known where she was living, every time she was contacted on social media she blocked us. We assumed she was still attending the uni. A week ago out of the blue we received a letter from her new landlord. She had given our names and addresses but her boyfriends father had signed as her guarantor. She owed 8 months rent, over £4000. We wrote back and explained our situation and he wants us to contact the guarantor to come to a mutual decision to pay off her debt. We dont have the money. The guarantor has not contacted us. The landlord said that if it’s not resolved ASAP he would be taking legal action. We are worried sick. The landlord went to the property today to tell her he had spoken to us, she was not there. If he takes it to court, would my daughter have to appear as well as the guarantor? I am so worried. He has also told us she has not been touring since last September. So worried.

OP posts:
KaterinaPetrova · 19/04/2019 23:12

and he wants us to contact the guarantor to come to a mutual decision to pay off her debt.

Well that's nice for him to say but I'm afraid it has absolutely nothing to do with you. At all.
The boyfriends dad is the guarantor, end of. The landlord absolutely cannot pursue you for your irresponsible and quite frankly fucking childish daughter's debt. So she gave you details? Big deal. It doesn't mean you agreed to anything. I could in theory put anyone's info down on a housing application but it doesn't mean shit unless they agree to be a guarantor.

I hope the landlord takes them to court, gets an eviction and gets his money somehow.

wizzywig · 19/04/2019 23:12

Oh god you must be worried sick. Have i understood this correctly: yr daughter has cut you off and out of the blue you've been contacted by an exlandlord to pay a huge fine. And you have no idea what your daughters up to?

HoneysuckIejasmine · 19/04/2019 23:12

Well, financially it's not your problem as you aren't the guarantor. More fool boyfriends Dad.

As for your daughter, it's not going to do her credit rating any good and it's very worrying in general about her sudden change of personality.

MrsKrabbapple · 19/04/2019 23:20

The landlord is trying it on/clutching at straws by saying this to you. You aren’t the guarantor.

You can’t run to someone’s mum when they owe you money. And the landlord knows this.

Iflyaway · 19/04/2019 23:33

Must be so worrying to know your daughter has gone off the rails, not contacting you.

I was like that at that age. Be patient. She will come back when she gets rid of the shit crowd she is in

So sorry you are going through this. I'm a LP.

You just have to hang in there and guide them through into adulthood.
It's never plain sailing having kids....

Singlenotsingle · 19/04/2019 23:40

I'm sorry for the landlord but really it's not your responsibility. DD is an adult, and you aren't the guarantor.

Iflyaway · 19/04/2019 23:43

She owed 8 months rent, over £4000.

I don't get this,,,,

Monthly rent or mortgage, utilities is taken as Direct Debit where I live (when you set it up, takes your mind off paying bills each month).

Hate to say it but sounds like she has gotten into a drugs situation...

GreenTulips · 19/04/2019 23:47

Well as an adult she needs to deal with the issue, and the guarantor is the BF father so he needs to deal with it.

That said, why has it taken 8 months to contact you?

Are they claiming benefits and not paying the rent?

ivykaty44 · 19/04/2019 23:52

Your dd is an adult and must sort out her own life. What a worry for you thhought

Butterymuffin · 20/04/2019 00:01

You're not the guarantor and you can't be made to pay. That's the one good thing about all this.

wellhelloyou · 20/04/2019 00:11

Sorry you’re going through this. Very difficult for you Flowers

You bailed her out once, you didn’t need to but you did.

You don’t owe her anything. She will continue to do this if she knows she CAN.

Love her but let her live her own ADULT life.

Hopefully one day she’ll realise and come back, but in the meantime, get on with your life. Hugs

SD1978 · 20/04/2019 00:26

As you haven't signed as her guarantor, not much the land lord can do. The only person they can try to recoup the money from is the boyfriends father. I would have no further contact with the land lord. And request that they no longer contact you as the situation is nothing to do with you. Your daughter has made her choices, and hopefully they will change in time. This is her situation and she needs to deal with it.

AlunWynsKnee · 20/04/2019 00:42

You don't have any legal responsibility for her debts. The bf's dad does because he signed to be a guarantor. They're probably struggling with him and trying their luck with you.
From their perspective they're hoping you'll give them the money otherwise they're out of pocket but they really can't do anything if you refuse. If you gave them anything it might be admitting some liability but I'm not a legal person so that might be wrong.

notapizzaeater · 20/04/2019 00:52

Should the landlord even have told you this ? She's an adult now

TitianaTitsling · 20/04/2019 07:53

Just because l'm cynical, is it definitely a proper landlord that has sent you this letter? No chance it's a 'pay £800 to this account' and it's the dodgy friends?

Wheresmyvagina · 20/04/2019 07:56

I don't get this,,,,

Monthly rent or mortgage, utilities is taken as Direct Debit where I live (when you set it up, takes your mind off paying bills each month).

What don't you get? People cancel the standing order and stop paying the rent.

AJPTaylor · 20/04/2019 08:00

The landlord took the risk when taking them on. If she had no job then LL was mad.
I would throw away any further correspondence from them.

JenniferJareau · 20/04/2019 08:02

Monthly rent or mortgage, utilities is taken as Direct Debit where I live (when you set it up, takes your mind off paying bills each month).

Direct debits are not the same as Standing Orders. Standing Orders are how people pay rent and they can be cancelled at any time. Sounds like the dd in this case cancelled the Standing Order and has gone into rent arrears.

IceRebel · 20/04/2019 08:05

The landlord said that if it’s not resolved ASAP he would be taking legal action.

I'd be telling them to go ahead. You have no legal responsibility for this debt.

IWannaSeeHowItEnds · 20/04/2019 08:06

To echo everyone else, you are only liable if you signed up to being a guarantor. I feel really sorry for the boyfriend's dad though.
The LL can't hold you to anything and if he takes legal action it might be good because at least you might find out where your daughter is. I'd probably contact the boyfriend's dad and see if he knows their whereabouts. I also think it sounds like she's gotten into drugs and I'd be trying to find her to check she's okay and trying to get her away from whoever she's with.

JenniferJareau · 20/04/2019 08:08

The landlord said that if it’s not resolved ASAP he would be taking legal action.

He is just grandstanding, trying to threaten you into paying the debt. He cannot do anything to you legally. He can pursue the person who guaranteed the rent, but not you.

bibbitybobbityyhat · 20/04/2019 08:12

So sorry to read this about your daughter Triplets! I think you need to make your response to the landlord just very brief and businesslike: "since I am not the rent guarantor on your property I will not be paying any rent arrears on anyone's behalf".

But might it be worth having a separate conversation with the boyfriend's father? To see if he knows what the hell is going on? You never know, he might be equally worried about his son.

blackcat86 · 20/04/2019 08:15

Its convenient for the landlord to contact you and try to strong arm you into paying. I would write back stating that you are estranged from your daughter currently so you will not be paying her debt and it is not for you to contact the guarantor. Your daughter is an adult and the guarantor will need to sort the debt out with her. Dont pay a penny. I'm sorry that your daughter isn't in contact with you. I would be worried sick. It doesn't mean you should be acting like a bank for the landlord's convenience though.

acomingin · 20/04/2019 08:22

There is no obligation for you to pay it. He's trying it on. Tell him not to contact you again.

stanski · 20/04/2019 08:31

I'm a landlord. Given you are NOT the guarantor there is absolutely nothing they can do to you, legally they wouldn't get anywhere at all with you. It is a fairly standard practice to contact everyone who's details you have for the tenant as some parents have the funds and would pay it, even though it's not their responsibility. Parents do bail their kids out. So don't worry yourself for the financials / legal action etc as unless you have signed something you wouldn't be liable for any of it.

On the other note I get the feeling that if you had the 4K you would have bailed her out again. You shouldn't. She's at an age where she needs to learn to take responsibility for her actions, and she'll likely learn it the tough way, but you shouldn't help in this circumstance, especially given she cut you off and left you to cover previous damage costs.