Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Money matters

Find financial and money-saving discussions including debt and pension chat on our Money forum. If you're looking for ways to make your money to go further, sign up to our Moneysaver emails here.

Original poster

Please need some urgent information -

26 replies

Upsadaisy · 03/07/2007 23:47

H is offering a 60 40 split opn house which will result in me gaining 3000.00 on the condition i never seek maintenace payments.
I've told him no to which he said this is what his solicitor has informed him that he does not have to ever pay maintenace again the boys are 4 and 6. Now I know this is bullshit but i'm so shocked at his gall and the fact that he is trying to get out of contributing to his kids upkeep.

Is he full of bullshit or is there some truth behind this soemthing about a final closure

OP posts:
jamDOHnut · 03/07/2007 23:50

i think you cfan make a clean break settlement but he';d pay more than 3k in a year in maintenanc e- tell him to fuck himself

NormaStanleyFletcher · 03/07/2007 23:51

Is this payments for the kids or payments for you?

Original poster
Upsadaisy · 03/07/2007 23:53

payments for the kids

OP posts:
newlifenewname · 03/07/2007 23:53

Say, lovely, great, thanks and pursue for maintenance afterwards.

LyraB · 03/07/2007 23:54

£3k is not a lot to give up maintnance for life. You are entitled to maintenance for the children till they have left full-time education or are 18, can't remember which.
He is trying it on. Don't let him get away with it.

essbeehindyou · 03/07/2007 23:56

Message withdrawn

KerryMum · 03/07/2007 23:57

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

essbeehindyou · 04/07/2007 00:02

Message withdrawn

mamama · 04/07/2007 00:02

60/ 40 split on the house? That gives you $3000? Are you sure? Unless I'm being really daft, that would make your house worth less than $8000...

If you can get a settlement then great. But, make sure it is fair. Can you get some legal advice? Maybe talk to the citizen's advice bureau?

jamDOHnut · 04/07/2007 00:02

how mich does he earn? isnt the loose figure for 2 kids 20% of his income? and im sure he has to pay until they leave full time education or aer 19 and in further education - so plenty of years left

jamDOHnut · 04/07/2007 00:03

mamama - that would presumabloy be the equity not the the value

essbeehindyou · 04/07/2007 00:03

Message withdrawn

mamama · 04/07/2007 00:04

Oh, if your share is the 60% then that makes it even more ridiculous. Please get some legal advice.

mamama · 04/07/2007 00:06

Oh yes, see, I was being daft. Sorry

mamama · 04/07/2007 00:08

Even so, 3000 is not much. At all. Not enough to not pay maintenance.

Original poster
Upsadaisy · 04/07/2007 00:17

50% would be about 15,000 60% would be approx 18,000. 3000 difference

OP posts:
Original poster
Upsadaisy · 04/07/2007 00:25

I've had legal advice but the house has had an offer and with no agreement the money from the house would be held until an agreement was made upon completeion of the divorce. I have nowhere to go and as he's refused to leave the house and being a
(&%**. I need it to sell for my own sanity to get away figting for an extra 3000.00 isn't worth another 4,5+ months of living under the same roof.

My little boy saw mw crying again tonight and said 'don't tell me another argument, don't worry mammy I love you'. We need to get away and live again

H turned round though after I agreed to the 50 50 split and said no no no he would only do 60 40 split as long as I agree to sign something agreeing that he never has to pay maintenace again.

OP posts:
newlifenewname · 04/07/2007 00:28

If there is any history of him being abusive (bullying included) you can get an order so that HE has to leave.

Just a thought though may not be applicable.

RosaLuxembourg · 04/07/2007 00:28

What does your solicitor say? In your position, I would refuse to talk directly to ex about it an insist on doing everything through the solicitor. Do not sign away your rights to maintenance payments. How much does he earn? He is likely to have to give you 20% as stated below and over the years till your youngest turns 18 that will add up to a lot more than £3000 I should have thought.

mamama · 04/07/2007 00:35

Sorry upsadaisy, I was being a bit slow

I wish I could help

{{hug}}

Original poster
Upsadaisy · 04/07/2007 00:49

Solicitor says a 70 30 split but that it will take time - I was happy with a 60 40 maybe 65 35 split.
He quit his job after we split and has gone part time working in a call centre so earns rougly what i get. he's done this so he can study but its bloody coincidental. he could have got a full time job with set hours leaving evenings and weekends to study.
I can't afford to go through the solicitor regards this as when the house sells we have nowhere to go. I'm not priority on a council waiting list as they say I should stay in this house but besides the mortgage payments is a home secured loan that together with the mortgage cost around 700.00 a month and thats before childcare and bill i just could't afford it I don't feel I could rely on him for maintenace payments the house would ened up being repossessed. This way me and kids can move out of this situation quickly but still come away with something.

he's said his solicitor has informed him of this I'm hoping he's full of shit as anybody telling anyone ways to avoid paying anything towards their children is low and can't beleive that another woman (his solicitor) would do that theres just no morals people aren't really like that are they? Have I got rose tinted glasses?

Its hard not to discuss these things due to living under the same roof still. He's been moaning about the child tax credits the fact that I get them and he won't so there for he shouldn't have to pay

OP posts:
Original poster
Upsadaisy · 04/07/2007 00:54

mamama crossed posts thanks for the hugs
and thanks to everyone who has replied I needed a bit of reassurance and propping up a bit and I got it. Your all stars!

OP posts:
mamama · 04/07/2007 20:45

Let us know what happens, Upsadaisy.

{hug}

chipkid · 04/07/2007 20:57

you cannot negotiate away your children's maintenance. The CSAct specifically states that any clause in a divorce agreement that attempts to preclude somebody from applying to the CSA is unenforceable! He's talking out of his ass.

I understand your predicament though. Can you tell him that you will not agree to the sale unless 5o% of the equity (you will not get less than this)is released to you to obtain alternative accommodation-pending a resolution of how the equity is to be divided?

BetsyBoop · 04/07/2007 20:57

you need legal advice - have you checked - you would probably be entitled to legal aid.

You have to look at all the assets of the marraige too - for example does he have a pension plan?

whatever you do don't sign away your right to maintenance for the kids