What benefits would I be entitled to?

[Florries]

DS is 8months and this month is the last of my maternity allowance. DH works full time but money is incredibly tight. We are living pay check to pay check and have gone into DH's overdraft a few times. We are one boiler breakdown /or/ 1 failed MOT/or/ 1 packed up washing machine away from real trouble.

I believe I receive child maintenance for DS.

I am unable to return to work as we would have to put DS into childcare which would be my entire wage plus a chunk of DH's. If I stay at home with DS, we get DH's entire wage. Essentially, I can't afford to work.

Shift work wouldn't work for us as DS is an awful sleeper, always has been, and I'm the only one who can settle him most of the time. I would also not be able to then sleep during the day as DS will only sleep on me for naps. I suffer from PND and the thought of being away from DS for a long period of time terrifies me.

Has anyone been in this position and know if there is any financial help I can apply for? I've never claimed anything before so am a complete naive novice in terms of anything I'm potentially entitled to.

What's your DHs income? Potentially child tax credits, housing benefit if you rent or universal credit if it's come in in your area.

If his income is too high to qualify then nothing. Honestly working opposite hours would be your only option.

What sort of childcare have you looked at? Childminders in our area are much cheaper than nurseries for example. Part time might work out cheaper than full time. You can also sign up to the tax free childcare scheme where the government pay £2 for every £8 you pay. Fwiw my second sounds like your son. Bad sleeper at night and only napped in the day if I put her for a nap. I had to return to work and sent her to a childminder. Sometimes she slept and sometimes she didn't. Such is life.

You could also do things from home - surveys (I managed to get about £20/month), ironing, dog walking, cleaning....anything you can think of really. Work for yourself...cleaning for example, charge £10 an hour and pay £4 an hour for a childminder minus the £1 contribution from the government and you're earning £7/hour.

Do you mean child benefit and not child maintenance? (Child maintenance is what you’d receive from an ex for a child you’d had previously).

Google “entitled to” benefits calculator and type in your situation and it will tell you what you can claim.

It doesn't sound like you can't afford to work it sounds like you can't afford not to work. What was your job before maternity?
You can't think about your entire salary going on childcare- your DH has to pay half. I know it seems like sophistry but it really isn't. You need to protect your future income. Investigate the tax free childcare as PP have said. As a minimum what about bar work in the evening?

Oham
OP has said that any money she earns plus some of DH's wage would be needed for childcare. They would be worse off than they are now. The DH is already spending all of his wage keeping everyone afloat.

You need to check if you are in a universal credit area or when you area becomes universal credit.

www.entitledto.co.uk/

This site is very useful. Be careful though to make sure you check if it is calculating under universal credit or the 'old' system (and know what is in place in your area - this site should tell you). I was hoping to be able to leave my narcissist husband, I got excited as under the old system I would have enough to get by on but when realised I would have to claim universal credit, and recalculated, my total income would be child benefit. Feel trapped now.

Do you mean child benefit not maintenance? When you say you believe you receive it have you actually applied for it?

What is your husbands income?

Check the turn2u website. They will calculate if you are entitled to any support.

I second looking for local child minder. Mine is amazing. Flexible and charges £3 an hour.

I of course adore my children but felt my mental well being was much more improved for working and being in some adult company.

If childcare costs and rent are high then you may be entitled to some Universal credit. they give you a childcare element based on 85% of your childcare costs and then this reduces depending on your wages but it may still mean you are entitled to some help. If you are still employed and are suffering with pnd then would taking sick leave be an option ?

I think your PND is clouding your judgement here as your arguments for not working are ones that most people just have to get on with everyday and feel thankful when our child gets to around five. The question you first need to address is are you too ill to work with your PND? If the answer is yes then get signed off by your doctor and take it from there.

Firstly make sure you are getting child benefit. It doesn't just appear, you have to apply for it. Secondly, if you job is too porly paid to cover childcare sound like you should look at evening or weekend work. No one else being able to settle DC is a red herring,if DH has to then DS will get used to him.

If in UK look here www.gov.uk/tax-credits-calculator and child benefit for first child is £20.70 per week, you need to apply look here www.gov.uk/child-benefit If you don't work, but claim child benefit, the claim also goes towards paying for your state pension. I agree, can you work evenings or weekends, your partner/DH can do the child care

Feel free to pm me, my situation is nearly exactly the same.
After my 1st I shot myself in the foot by getting a full time job instead of part time and ended up spending all my wage and more of DPs on childcare. It's a horrid situation.

Thank you so much for your replies. It's really quite embarrassing admitting we need a bit of help.

I've not looked into a childminder. It would just feel so wrong as I'm qualified in childcare and know I could care for DS better than anyone else in the world.

Yes, apologies, I do mean child benefit which is about £80 a month I believe and so incredibly brilliant. Very thankful for it indeed.

DH brings home about 1,300 a month. We pay our mortgage which I believe is around £750 and then all our bills and insurances.

Will have a look at the links PP sent now. Thank you.

Could you not look into being a child minder then?

Or working in a nursery setting and getting your child care at a discount.

Sounds like you have a few options

We all want to look after our own children. But that doesn't mean out sourced child care isn't a good thing for them.

You will need to look at options to work. Maybe become a registered childminder.

I think you really need to have a proper look at finances with your husband. You should know how much your monthly bills are, rather than just "believing" it's a certain amount. Also if you don't go back to work, will you have to pay back an amount of your maternity pay?

I truely don’t understand why you can’t work as a childminder?

I second becoming childminder - I had many lovely years of having a big family by proxy :) look up what is currently needed to become one although if you do wrap around care for over 8's I don't think you need to register. & start with teachers if you can as you will have most school holidays off. Alternatively have you an extra room?

Crikey, give her a break! She could live in a tiny flat for example! Child minding us a great idea OP and you should look in to it before you rely on benefits.

What about working weekends (assuming your dh doesn't work weekends). You won't need to pay any childcare.

Childminding is a great ideas. Or if your home can't accommodate childminding, what about being a nanny w. own child?

Try CAB - they have a benefits checker and can calculate UC and non-UC benefit entitlement.

They can also do a "cost of taking work" calculation.

550 for gas, elec, water, food, council tax etc is nothing. I really think you need to explore job options further and financial assistance with childcare costs.

I second the idea of childminding or shift work. Your dc being a bad sleeper isn’t really a reason not to do it but you mention PND too. Are you getting any help with this?