What would you do for money during tough months. Is this wrong?

[Danity856]

Before you read this please remember that you do not know me as a person, my journey's a bit screwy from the start and my decisions probably reflect that... Sometimes I just seek a bit of general guidance from more "normal" people. You'd understand if you knew me.

I know loads of rich guys because I was an escort when I was 19, a few years before I had my DD. I was really lucky (if that's the right term..) because the guys I happened to meet didn't want to use me as a prostitute in that way you'd expect, instead, they became like "sugar daddies". So I had three, one who never even tried to kiss me or sleep with me but would like to go on nights out with me to nice bars and take me to restaurants and sometimes I just had to sit and watch him play golf... he would just give me 5grand one day and a diamond ring the next. The other two would want sex, take me shopping on Oxford street (I would sell everything they bought me) and just give me cash. I earned plenty, I'd also done webcam modelling, all that nasty stuff basically.

Then I moved and had a relationship and had DD. I broke up with her dad when i found out I was pregnant because he was sort of a coke junkie (I had already quit all drugs and even alcohol almost a year before I got pregnant). Since I had DD I have completely stayed away from any kind of stuff I used to do before.. not done webcam modelling or anything like that whatsoever, completely stayed clear. I feel like after having a girl and seeing how perfect how life could be I sort of felt an intuitive understanding within myself that my life was not okay but that hers totally could be.

I'm now doing a degree, and I start work in Feb. I am at the end of paying off some loans and debts but basically money is extremely tight, every bit of income I've had just recently has gone straight back out. A guy who has known me from before and says he always fancied me is asking if he can take me out to lunch today and said he will give me £100 just to go out for lunch with him, that's it. I imagine he would repeatedly want to see me for money. Nothing sordid (he is saying) and it will be totally public then I can just go home. I said yes and it's now a couple hours away from the time he has asked to meet and I'm getting a weird feeling. I don't know if I'd be an idiot to say no considering I could even do with just having some milk right and nappies right now or if saying yes to something like that is like me going ten steps back... it's like a sugar baby thing to do? And me resorting to devaluing myself for money again? What would you do. I know I'm a bit screwy some help from someone normal would be cool lol

also, just to mention. I cannot take out any loans because my score is awful and loans are the reason I'm in this mess so I'm trying to completely get rid of loans in my life. I signed up to TakeNote to make money transcribing and they took me on board but there is literally no work. I do the whole filling out surveys for money. Uploading my receipts for money... I'm on dog walking apps and again no work. Just none of it seems to be getting me anywhere, can't even redeem any of the money I am making on those

OP what a story... And what a strong woman you are. I can see why you're tempted but there WILL be another way. Don't go don't do it it's the thin end of the wedge. You gave it up make THIS your story. Continue doing it for your daughter. Sorry wish I could help you much love to you x

Im a single parent with a very supportive family. I reckon if i was you id do it. But only if my strong resolve to stay strong and get on the straight and narrow stayed strong. If i felt i was being coerced into more thsn lunch i wouldnt. Having no money and needing nappies and milk is shit. Whatever you decide wwll done for stopping the drugs and drink.

Bump. I hope someone else comes along to help you figure things out soon.

Yes. Never trust anyone not to hold a secret. You have to strongly consider that too.

yes, the thin end of the wedge... That makes sense and I think that's the feeling of dread I have inside rn. Even though it sounds so easy and harmless and obvious it's probably not, you're right. I will make another way for now. I actually just had an idea, we have a clothes bank that gives money when you give them clothes so I will gather up mine and DD's old clothes and might find bits to sell.

Don’t do it. You know in yourself it’s the wrong thing, so listen to your intuition. I don’t get why guys pay to take a woman to lunch. Can’t he find a girlfriend? If not, what’s wrong with him? Don’t consent to allowing yourself to be bought goods. You’re worth more than money. Self respect is far more important. Be a role model for your daughter. Better struggling and doing it your way than being some rich mans eye candy. If he doesn’t like you enough to have a proper realty, what is this really all about for him? Don’t do it. All credit to you for changing your life around. Stick at it, you will survive, and your head will be held high. Xx

Relationship

Honestly if it was a case of struggling to buy milk and nappies I think I would do it. I would like to take the high road but life is complicated and full of grey areas. I would advise you not to because your instincts are telling you ‘no’, but no one should judge you for trying to provide for your little girl.

I've just messaged him back, it's off now. I knew it was wrong don't know why I didn't trust that intuition, I think I trust other people's thoughts above mine because of how I can clearly make such off choices. I questioned if I would be an idiot to not take 100. @Moononthehill28 telling me to trust my intuition, thank you, this is something others keep telling me. I'm working on it. Gosh, I feel a bit emotional for some reason.

Good for you!!

Well done you!!! Really well done. One day not too far away you will be through this and you and your daughter will feel so good.

I think the reason you feel weird about it is because you know that if you go ahead, you will be slipping back towards doing work that you thought you had left behind. I make no judgement at all of you or any one else who does this sort of work, but if you are uncomfortable with the idea of returning to it, it probably isn't right for you.

If you are a student you will be able to access support from the Student Union at your university. There will be a hardship fund available to help out students who are having financial difficulties, so please go along and talk to them. You don't need to give them all the detail you have shared here if you don't want to, just say that you are a lone parent and you need money for essentials.

Take care of yourself. You are doing a really tough job looking after your daughter whilst studying too and I wish you all the best for your future.

There are far, far better things ahead than anything we left behind.
C.S Lewis