How do you do your family money?

[booklover164]

I'm sure this has been asked countless times but I can't find any posts on it.

I'm going back to work after mat leave and will be working part time. My hubby will be taking home significantly more than me. How do you all arrange your finances to pay bills, socialising money etc? How do you work out contributions to the mortgage etc?

Thank you!

All money in one pot..big purchases discussed.
We believe we're a family..one unit so it's one pot.
If you want to agree 'pocket money' for each of you to waste on whatever have a chat about it.
One person is earning more as the other is taking the family job in exchange for they're employment

We have a joint account into which all income is paid.
All the bills / savings come out of this account and we pay ourselves a set amount each month for our personal expenditure, this goes into our sole accounts.
Big expenses are discussed. We have a spreadsheet which we update monthly setting out what is coming in and going out over the next few weeks. It also shows where our savings are etc. My DH leaves it all to me but it is important to me that he knows what is going on.
It is all "our" money regardless of who gets paid what and whose name is on the account.

One big shared pot with an equal allocation for savings and spending.

All money in one pot.

Like the posters above, all money in one pot. When I worked in the ME (and wasn't allowed to have my own bank account ) I never even saw the cash I earned, it went straight into DH bank account only he had access to..!

Big purchases are discussed, we get treats and things if we want to. Luckily neither of us is profligate so not an issue. He does the money management side of things, with online banking etc. I have access to the accounts to see what's coming in and out. I manage utilities, council tax etc. Communication and trust is key when it comes to money I think. My poor mother had neither with my dad and is something I've always remembered and was determined never to be put in that situation.

3 joint accounts

1. All money in, including tax credits, child benefit etc income- everything. All bills and outgoings come out of this account.

1. And 3 - joint accounts that we use one each as our own personal spending money. We transfer an equal and set amount to these accounts from account 1 and we spend as we wish.

We have an agreed amount of “extra” money that we leave in account 1 for family days out / kids stuff. Anything over this we discuss and budget together.

All incoming money goes into a joint account. Any purchases other than essentials are discussed beforehand. DH and I get £75/month each into our personal accounts to spend on whatever we want, 6yo gets £5/month cash to spend on what he wants.

I work 15 hours a week so my money pays for the food shopping. DH pays for everything else. If the car needs fuel, a term class booking for my DS etc, DH just puts it in my account. He has never once mentioned ‘my money, your money’ and treats it all as ours. There was a time in the passed, I wasn’t more money and paid for everything

We're on one income, it goes into a joint account where all bills and direct debits come from then an amount goes into another joint account for food and groceries.
We all have separate savings that we pay into monthly.
Whatever is left gets split between me and DH for general spends not equally though. I get more as I buy the majority of the kids stuff, pay for school trips, meals out etc.

Whenever I've worked most of it has been used to save/overpay the mortgage and the remainder split between us.

I earn less than a quarter of DH's high salary, due to going PT and taking additional unpaid Parental Leave in the holidays. We each have our salaries paid into our own accounts and then transfer some into central account, DH putting most in, and my contribution being small. As we have greater income than expenses, we both then find the most tax efficient way to deal with the rest. We both have multiple savings, ISA stocks and shares on the side (all individual), but when DH has used his allowance he puts it into mine.

I like to keep my own account so he can't see everything I buy, presents etc. I buy from the joint current, joint credit card (cash back one so worth using), or own credit card depending on what it is and what card I have on me. Children's clothes, household expenses all come from the joint, and sometimes my own stuff too. In the summer I only got half my part-time pay due to parental leave, so he transferred his bonus into my own current account so I still had my 'private' money.

Any large single item expenditure over maybe £200 we casually discuss, and agree. I think we consider the money as 'ours'. Our tastes and needs are similar.

Only difference is on the sum he has inherited, which just sits there. I can't access the accounts (not in UK). We discuss together what to do with it, but haven't got round to doing anything. He feels he should have the final say on this money as it's 'his' family's.

If money was tight I think we'd sort it out a bit more clearly, but as it is, neither of us has really expensive tastes, and so it doesn't come up.

We just have "the money".
All bills paid from the same account- large purchases discussed, we each know how much we have got left for spending on other stuff.

Money goes into joint account.
Equal amount of ‘spends’ goes out to individual accounts.

Family spending and all bills etc come out of joint account.
Random shit like costa/clothes/books etc comes out of individual accounts.

All money goes into one joint account/pot. It's family money and it doesn't matter who earns what. We go on holidays, meals out, cinema etc together. Even our kids are shared so there really is no need for us to separate anything - it would make life way too complicated.

One joint account, agree with others doesn't matter who contributes how much, we spend it as a family - we obviously discuss big purchases with each other but it's certainly not a case of me (the much lower earner) having to 'ask permission' if I want to spend something on myself, we are just respectful of each other's requirements and hobbies.

It clearly helps if you both have similar attitudes to finance ie: if one of you is a spender and the other a saver it can cause friction.

Works for us - in 30 years of marriage the one thing we've never argued about is money, and I was a SAHM for 12 years but never felt I was 'beholden' to my DH.

We put the vast majority of our wages in the joint account leaving about £100 in current account for small bits and bobs. All family purchases go on joint credit card that gets paid off at the end of the month.

One pot. Dh has a separate account , I just ask him for the balance when I’m doing monthly budget and if we need to check more detail I’ll get him to show me. He’s given me the log in but I can’t be bothered remembering it. Mortgage and savings, holidays and Christmas, everything else.
You aren’t not earning, you are funding his work life and bringing up the children, financially you should be equal.

One pot. We both get paid into one account and take what we need from that account.

Each have our own money. Set amount paid into joint account for bills. Each have own savings and spending money.

Never plan to fully mix money. I wouldn't want to have to ask to buy something when i know i've earnt enough money to pay for it.

I have gone back to work full time after having our daughter who is 10months old

Same as lazypuppy. We’re both savers so have similar attitudes to money so it’s not like we fritter away every month but I like the knowledge that I can if I want to

All money in one pot all bills from one pot. It's always worked for us.

Joint account. Pretty similar spending habits. Would discuss big purchases.

Same as Lazypuppy. Earn a similar amount, so works for us.

Gosh quite different to most of you. I'm sure it makes a difference that we both work FT though.

Salaries into separate accounts. No joint account. I wouldn't like DH being able to see everything I'm buying etc.

DH pays very large mortgage, I pay other bills and generally do food shopping. Large expenses like school fees, uni accommodation DH pays and I pay school trips and birthday/xmas. In all honesty, we haven't talked about this ever it is just how it happened.

Don't feel anyone has to answer as it is personal - but do you not feel constricted and worried at not having your 'own' money?

We each have individual accounts into which our salaries are paid. Then on the same day each month we put the agreed amount into the joint account and pay for everything from that. We don't put the same amount in as I earn more so contribute for money. We discuss all big purchases, loans, credit cards etc. We are free to spend/save money that is left over from contributing to the joint account as we wish. We also discuss pensions, insurance, holidays, unusual bills together.