When considering stopping working and becoming a SAHM what SACRIFICES are you prepared to make and what things will you simply NOT COMPROMISE ON?

[drosophila]

I suppose it boils down to why some of us go out to work. Things I don't want to do without are:

• New clothes (cheap but new) for my kids. Handmedowns only from one sibling to another.
• proper fitted shoes for my kids.
• good quality food. My judgement here of course.
• a home that is big enough for all of us.
• books
• the odd activity outside of school.

Things I can happily do without:

-car (although we do have an old one).

• loads of toys.
• a social life (ok not that happy about that one)
• expensive food.
• expensive clothes for me or the kids.

Some sacrifices people make to stay at home and not work are alien to me and I wonder how uncommon I am. My desires may well have something to do with growing up in a fairly over crowed house with bugger all.

tough call, probably helps outlining this before having the baby so you don't feel pressured to return to work to afford stuff not on your list. I never thought about this. until now...

I am willing to sacrifice

• Meat and expensive food (although I would still chose good quality produce & meat, just less often)

• Clothing for me

• Expensive holidays

I am not willing to compromise on:

• Decent food for DS (minimally processed, mainly homemade etc)

• Quality of day care

• Travel

• My sanity (!) - I do voluntary work and work from home to earn a tiny but of money and keep myself busy when DS is in bed. I need to feel like I contribute to the wider world, nit just DS's life, although he is my priority.

i dunno. you do what you have to do, don't you?

i am not willing to sacrifice anything, really. but you do, over time, you think, what is more important, being at home or a new haircut? what is more important, being at home or eating nice food, etc. and gradually all your principles fly out of the window.

will sacrife:

• holidays
• eating out regularly
• new stuff for house - sofas, new bathrooms, etc
• buy anything we fancy in the food shop
• clothes and shoes for myself
• social life
• expensive clothes for kids (although i never bought them anyway even when i worked full time)
• posh cosmetics/toilettries, etc
• stupid amounts of toys for birthdays/christmas (although again never went overboard to start with - see a 'tight arse' theme....)

Won't sacrife:

• healthy food for boys (although usually cheaper than processed crap IME)
• car (we have two...)
• the occasional meal out
• properly fitted shoes for boys most of the time

add to will sacrife:

• haircuts for me....

Juat to add, I work part time....

agree with popsy ex on haircuts, also enough slap to not look too mumsy

Try not to compromise a social life - it doesn't have to be expensive, but you NEED it. And make sure you get some time away from kids!

I compromised on these things and almost lost the plot.

you see, social life ti ne really isnt an issue
i am too tired to bother lol

asocia life tricky

i am lucky cos my kids are friends with people i'd choose as friends ANYWAY

but i realise i am fortunate

Social life - or me that was the worst thing, but then we were living in a very isolated spot with no friends or family nearby so that was the problem really rather than being a SAHM - we live in a city again now and although I enjoy being back at work I sometimes think how much more fun it would be to be a SAHM here!!

Agree about good quality food and decent shoes - not to be compromised on!

DH insists on going out to dinner, that is his no-compromise thing, which to me is a big waste of money.

will not sacrifice:
holidays (they count as education imo)
trips to see my family in the UK
the occasional meal out

will sacrifice:
new clothes
make up
toilettries
gadgets and appliances
alcohol
a car
nice stuff for the house

hmm it is intresting as I wont be returning to work after my mat leave

I will be giving up

*company car
*new clothes for me
*being able to eat what I want for dinner (will have to meal plan)
waxinghaircuts and colours
*new house
*holidays aboard

I will still have

• our family caravan down the coast
• hubbies car (if i drop him to work) *clothes for children *balanced meals *social life, but includes childrens friends mums

Should be fun, I have always worked part time, hope I can cope ;)

L

LIs, sounds like you are sorted.