Im crap with money and I want to change. Being honest is step 1...

[lankylisa]

Before I went on maternity leave 1.5 years ago, I had a few thousand pounds worth of debt which I moved onto a 0% credit card so each month, I am actually chipping away at the debt.

I cashed in my teacher pension and after 7 months, returned to work just 2 days a week (DH has DD the days I'm at work and himself on works 3 days)

I have slowly begun to use my other credit card to pay for food shopping, heating oil, petrol, clothes, coffee, even outings for my DDIm nearly at the bottom of the credit limit of that £4,500) and am always living in my £1500 overdraft. I feel so wretched about it all.

I start to make changes and then something massive happens to my car and I suddenly have to cough up £300 or my pet who needed blood tests and an x ray and then that's another £250.

I am in a sort of 'burying my head in the sand' mode and feel any attempt to change is such a drop in the ocean that there's no point.

But where does this end?

I am currently advertising to be a childminder/ nanny on the days Im at home with my daughter so at least some money will come in while Im with her so I won't have to pay for child care.

Has anyone else (bad with money) managed to change?

Thanks

PS my DH is just as bad as me.

nothing wrong with using the credit card if you pay it off.

what you need to do is stop the non essemtials. learn to walk without coffee or food. stop buying adult clothes, yo u dont need any. no takeways, books ( use library)

probably too late for pet insurance. hammer down all other insurances and utilities.

In my late 20's and early 30's (pre kids) i was terrible - salary + basic outgoings would just clear overdraft each month. I had to make drastic changes - cut up the credit card, use cash only and only a set amount each week, ditched all non essentials. I made a sort of game of it - how frugal can I be this month..?

Once the debts were gone and I came out of enforced frugality, I really saw how much I had wasted money. i then began to save in earnest - at the beginning of each month with a set amount, not just what was left.

I am now very solvent! I pay CC off in full every month, no overdraft and regular savings. So yes, change is possible. Good luck.

Sounds like you need to start from scratch with budgeting as currently it is impossible to tell whether you are getting into debt because your income doesn't meet your basic expenditure, or you are overspending on luxuries (and even a coffee or sandwich out of the house is a luxury if you don't have the money to pay for it).

Get yoru DH on board or else it will be one step forward and two steps back and go through everything advised here:

www.moneysavingexpert.com/banking/Budget-planning

Have you done an actual Statement Of Affairs - ie a sheet with ALL your income and outgoings on it, including your partners as well? The first step to budgeting is working out where the money is going and how much you have going in. Theres no point scrimping on things that hurt if you are spending £25 on work lunches or coffees or cigarettes or anything else where you dont realise the true cost of it.

I think the MoneySavingExpert forum has a template one you can download.

If whatever your pet needed the vets/blood tests for is sorted, it might be worth looking at pet insurance, which could cost as little as a tenner a month and put an end to all those three figure bills.

thanks so much.