I love my in laws to bits. They're lovely and I wish I saw more of them (they live in Ireland). Last year DH and I persuaded them finally to sell their house because they were in terrible arrears with the mortgage and had been threatened with repossession. With each month that went by, the debt increased. They ended up with just enough to buy the cheapest possible bungalow in their town. The purchase was very problematic and, in the interim, they have lived with DH sister. Now they've decided not to go ahead with the purchase and stay put. At first they wanted to give us, and presumably DH's sister the money. We guessed they were giving her quite a bit for one thing and another anyway. We told them no, they should keep what little capital they had in property, that it could be so problematic living with their daughter, what could go wrong etc. DH sister also in v bad debt and in default with mortgage. She has no permanent job and they're all in bad health. They're determined not to buy again however, or even to invest the money. They and DH sister have started to spend the capital and now they're offering to pay for our patio which is generous but not good for them financially. I just think they're making a huge mistake. What if the bank throws them all out of my SIL's house? What if she gets a new man and it doesn't work out them living together? What if they need money for their care etc? How do I make them see sense? Or do I just take the money, say 'thanks very much' and stop worrying?!