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CSA, child Benefit , tax credits and being BULLIED by EX.........................................

13 replies

kernowcat · 08/05/2007 16:01

I posted a couple of weeks ago reagrding my ex trying to get me to sign a letter to the CSA saying I didn't want the money that they are ttrying to make him pay. (He left 10yrs ago and hasn't paid a penny since). DS 14yrs moved in with his Dad 20mnths go, Ex phoned this morning and said if I refused to sign he would report me for benefit fraud, as I am claiming child benefit for both children.

Help CAB were shut when I got home, should I just contact the IR and explain the situation?

Can't believe he's being so nasty.

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kernowcat · 08/05/2007 16:02

help? anybody work for IR????

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percypig · 08/05/2007 16:04

Your ex sounds v selfish, and like he expects you to give into his bullying threats.

If you're claiming CB for both children, what are you doing with the money for the child who isn't living with you?

I would phone IR and explain the whole thing to them, make sure you can account for the CB/have a plausible explanation though.

mumto3girls · 08/05/2007 16:06

Let him...you can pay the bill out of the £30k he will give you. How many years has your DC lived with him...say 2 years = 52 weeks x 2 = 104 weeks at about a tenner a week.
Tell the CB it was a genuine oversight and you will pay it back.

Therefore you would owe them a tiny fraction of what he owes you. Tell him to go for it the vengeful bastard!

kernowcat · 08/05/2007 16:07

I use the money to pay for train travel when my DS visits (school holidays) and for things for my DS and DD. Even though he is not here all the time he's still my son. I've always struggled finacially since EX left.

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mumto3girls · 08/05/2007 16:10

How many years money is it?

kernowcat · 08/05/2007 16:16

DS moved September 2005.

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mumto3girls · 08/05/2007 16:34

Is it just CB you have claimed or Tax credits etc?

Also, how does EX know?

kernowcat · 08/05/2007 16:46

both, crap excuse but I just didn't think of it before. I've been off work for the last 7mnts with stress. Its been a huge struggle.

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mumto3girls · 08/05/2007 17:23

Are you allowed to claim them anyway if you're not working?

Just phone them yourself, tell them you will pay back anything you owe out of the wodge og cash your EX owes you!

kernowcat · 08/05/2007 17:30

would it be very wrong to go to the change of circumstances web page and change it now?

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pirategirl · 08/05/2007 17:44

u have my sympathy, i too have a bullying ex who has threatened to report me for fraud, when he left us in a financial mess, and holds this over my head, and basically , now gets away with anything he chooses.

Hmmm,

If you change your circumstances now, its prob wise.

Is there really any proof, of how long your ds has been living with the ex?

Does the amount ex is supposed to pay you enuff to bother with. I know its their duty etc, but i dont think you are gonna see that money from the past, but the money now, is it a fair amount, cos if not its not even worth bothering cos they will take it out yuor inc support inyhow, if you're on it, so basically these men get away with this, cos its not worth our time.

oh yes and its also not worth us going to prison for.

My solicitor sadi that she had rarely come across a man who would seriously report an ex for fraud, and that even if he did, the courts would seriously look at the bigger picture, and the stress, and the dificulties you are in.

pirategirl · 08/05/2007 17:46

you cuold also say to them that you claimed themoney for child ben, to help your son visit you, as you knew your ex could not be relied upon to provide this money for him to do so.

just paint him out to be really unreliable, and how its bad enuff that he's chosen to live with his dad, and youwanted to make sure you got regular access.

kernowcat · 08/05/2007 18:19

Thanks PG. I'm going to change my details tonight by email to the IR and also I'll send a hard copy.

The amount the CSA are trying to claim for is £16k approx for benefits and £33k for the children. I know I'll probably get it in £1 weekly payments from him but I refuse to be blackmailed.

I'll check back later my DS has just signed into MSN for our catch up / homework chat!!
Thanks.

Hope your situation is not too bad?

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