I’m 24 (female) and I’ve been with my girlfriend (27) about a year. She is ina very low paying job with little education. I have much more education but was making similar money to her. I stopped working in November to study for my exams, and i had savings to that end.
For the last few months, there is constantly some reason she has no money. Some of them were legitimate, but I can’t shake the feeling that had she been more proactive they would have resolved quicker (ie had she gotten angrier with the bank when they were doing things wrong). Then she promised she was going to take back up her studies or in some other way change career to make a little more. This was originally meant to be January, now it’s likely to Be March and she’s talking about essentially just taking whatever she can get.
I understand it’s easier for me because I have more opportunities and am generally better at handling admin problems. But I am also broke as a result of paying for all our groceries, going out, her phone/médical bills etc. It’s not that she necessarily asks me for money but if i don’t pay, she’s like oh I don’t need to go get that prescription (meaning she is sick and I have to mind her) or she has no phone or there is no food in the house. It is likely close to 1000e I have given her directly or indirectly at this point. If I don’t pay for drinks/cinema etc, we just spend all our time at home watching Netflix while she gets stoned with her housemate.
Everything I’ve seen about financial abuse is the reverse (ie me controlling her with the threat of taking away money) but I feel like I’m getting screwed here.