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Original poster

Monthly outgoings - huge

64 replies

SouthWestmom · 28/11/2017 09:25

So how do people not on a high salary manage? I always think on paper we look amazing and actually we live in a normal house in an average area, drive a normal car (3 years old) and can't afford holidays every year.

We recently remortgaged as we needed a better deal and at the same time I added everything to the joint account - bills, food etc.

We each pay into it and out of anything left have to cover clothes, gifts, meals out, petrol etc.

The joint account comes to 4026 going out.

This includes mortgage, council tax, house, life, pet, boiler insurance.

Mobile phones on contract.

Childcare.

Utilities.

TV and broadband (basic package but also NOW tv)

Activities - this is high at £200 pcm

Uni costs - 200

Savings - 500 (new, don't have any, will see if they last)

Car £150

Pension at 30

So I'm not after sympathy obviously, but even taking out the non essentials it's £3k.

How is it affordable for anyone? It's crazy.

OP posts:
Original poster
SouthWestmom · 28/11/2017 12:06

Sorry, uni costs are how much we pay each month to oldest child who gets the minimum loan.

OP posts:
Original poster
SouthWestmom · 28/11/2017 12:08

A pp asked and I did actually do a spreadsheet of all last months expenses in cash/card for me - horrified at the amount of top up shopping I did. So that's a change for next month. Signed up to Tesco delivery saver and will order the same pretty much each week.

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JoJoSM2 · 28/11/2017 12:41

To answer the question of the ‘normal scale’ - the income sounds average to me. The mortgage sounds big for the income. Other than that, like people have pointed out you seem to spend excessive amounts on random stuff like boiler insurance or £25/month per phone etc. So perhaps your life doesn’t feel as nice as it could because of your priorities. If you chose reduced some of your costs and spend the money on a nice holiday perhaps the lifestyle would feel nicer.

HolyShet · 28/11/2017 12:42

phew on the phones.... not too bad then!

your mortgage is MASSIVE (3 times ours) but the term explains it. it will save you actual money in the form of interest though.

maybe I was optimistic re "endstage" - deffo latestage though, this can't go on!

Original poster
SouthWestmom · 28/11/2017 14:19

Holy endstage haha . I cannot wait to lose the mortgage.

It's really interesting hearing what people think are non essentials etc. I always thought boiler insurance was pretty standard, and we were the lucky ones for whom £900 was done within the cover.

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MrsPatmore · 28/11/2017 14:55

In a few short years your mortgage costs will be halved and your income will rise so hopefully you'll feel a little better off. We're in a similar position but luckily have final salary pensions.

Ellisandra · 28/11/2017 20:03

How will the mortgage half and how will her income rise?

I think it does help to recalibrate what's "normal".

Is the £150 for the car ongoing expenses like insurance and petrol, or is that a finance payment?

As part of the recalibration exercise, I have a pretty OK wage, but I wouldn't even think about a 3 year old car. I sold my 2003 Focus last year and bought a 2008 Golf.

BikeRunSki · 28/11/2017 20:07

Savings, uni and fairly new car are not normal.

Nyx1 · 28/11/2017 20:13

Bit confused on boiler insurance
You don't mean£900 for that?

Activities are high, phones are high, could do PAYG

Also can't see what your spend is on food and household stuff so hard to comment really

clarrylove · 28/11/2017 20:17

Look at giffgaff for your phones on PAYG. Monthly cost around £7.50 each. Newer handsets for birthdays/Xmas?

Original poster
SouthWestmom · 28/11/2017 20:19

400 on food, that's included in the total.

The car is a lease payment. It's newish because I drive miles every week for work and couldn't manage the unpredictable costs for my previous car (older) and this includes stuff like servicing.

I agree about recalibration normal. Thank you for making this interesting and polite and not knee jerk.

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Original poster
SouthWestmom · 28/11/2017 20:21

Nyx sorry, the boiler insurance is £24 pcm. It covers boiler pipes and rads. It includes an annual service. When the cylinder leaked we got a new one 'free' and fitted whereas I'd been quoted £900.

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Doobydoo · 28/11/2017 20:27

Not meaning to derail but we are thinking of boiler insurance.......is it not a good ideaConfused

Original poster
SouthWestmom · 28/11/2017 22:52

I would say it is 😂

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scaryteacher · 28/11/2017 22:59

We have a high income, and high outgoings, but having moved recently (not through choice, l/l wanted house back), I was shocked/surprised by how much stuff we have, and how little I really need to buy.

We are abroad, and have a house in the UK to which we will return in a couple of years. Our income will drop hugely. However, as the mortgage will be gone, and ds will hopefully be in gainful employment, life will be fine. We have everything we need, and most of the things we want.

Our mortgage was converted to repayment and done over 15 years, and the end is in sight, and will be there quicker if we don't have to burn another €10k in moving again. We plan to chunk lump sums off the mortgage so it's gone, or as near as dammit when we get back to UK.

JoJoSM2 · 29/11/2017 07:31

We’re a high-income household and the only insurance we have is house, cars and a bit of life cover through work. We only pay the basic TV licence, I pay £30pm for my phone as I treated myself to an iPhone and dh pays £7.50pm with Lebara. It’s only this year that we’ve splashed out on nice new cars for ourselves- we used to drive old bangers before. We sold them for 3k combined ;) Our mortgage is relatively small although we do have a lovely big house (but in a cheap area). Where we prioritise our spending is investments, pensions as well as regular hols, hobbies and little things like cleaner, garder, nice food etc.

dunraven · 29/11/2017 14:16

I compared general living costs with a friend once and it was surprising how much our views differed in what we regarded as luxuries and essentials.

Mobile phone contracts is a biggy - we're OK with not the latest iphones so we have PAYG Giff Gaff at £7.50/ £10 pcm. DH has a contract on his work mobile which is owned/paid for by his emplyer. She's happy to pay £60 pcm for an up to date phone - that's £600 pa right there!

I don't have a TV package at all, just a broadband/phone one at £20 pcm. Her Sky deal costs £60 pcm so another £480 pa differential there.

DC activities - she averages £100 more pcm than me so £1200 pa.

Cars - she leases her for £250 pcm. I'm happy to drive an 8 yr old Focus which definitely does not costs me £250 pcm to service/maintain.

We didn't go beyond this but she also had Amazon Prime and Spotify when I didn't.

It wasn't hard to point out that she could adjust her spending to prioritise a family holiday but in her eyes, she'd rather the kids were indulged in their daily lives. Horses for courses!

dunraven · 29/11/2017 14:22

So, just for 3 items alone - mobile phone costs, TV/broadband and DC activities, I was spending £2K per year less than her! We were both shocked.

Original poster
SouthWestmom · 29/11/2017 17:41

That is really interesting. I guess I'm probably more in line with your friend, as those just seem to be what everyone has/does. Food for thought!

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Desmondo2016 · 29/11/2017 23:16

We sound pretty similar to you although have been saving circa 500p/m for years (and spending it as and when, we don't have hundreds of thousands in savings lol). We have about 1700 come out the joint account but that is just mortgage household bills and food shopping. The other stuff you mentioned comes out of each of our individual accounts but i reckon it probably does add up to what yours is. We dont have any debt other than the mortgage. However like a previous poster said we could probably reduce it massively if we a) needed to or b) were so inclined. For example I dread to think what we spend in Tescos each month lol. Pretty sure it's at least 3 times more than it needs to be. But hey, life is for living! I would say you don't have a lot to worry about bit you probably do need to ensure your monthly outgoings include at least a couple hundred to savings and preferably 4 or 5 hundred.

scaryteacher · 30/11/2017 09:34

We have just had to move which cost €10k by the time you add it all up (that's rented, it's Belgium, and an expensive PITA), but we are trying to use what we have and not buy more apart from food, as we want to have the mortgage gone by the time we go home in 2 years. That means approx £37k and keeping payments at the current level.

I looked at the amount of shower gel I had, and was quite shocked, so won't need to buy any of that for ages, ditto shampoo. I need to stop my Kindle daily deal habit, and my sewing stash habit as well, as I have more than enough to be going on with. I don't need new clothes either, so there's a saving there.

We have older cars, dh's mobile is paid for by work, and I have a PAYG, TV is Freesat (when we finally get around to installing it at the new place), and we managed to get a better phone and broadband contract than before. We do help ds massively with uni (no loans), and pay his phone contract etc, but that will stop next year when he completes his MA. However, that was part of the reason for being out here, that we could do that.

It is difficult not to spend when you see everyone else doing so, but every bit saved can go towards the mortgage, so that's a goal on its own.

It's also apparent (having moved ourselves and packed the boxes), that we do have everything we need, and we could well not spend on anything other than utilities, food and petrol etc for the next couple of years. I am aiming to do so, and use what we have so there is less to move home.

Original poster
SouthWestmom · 30/11/2017 18:42

Thank you for all the replies: I'm genuinely surprised (pleasantly sort of) that we are doing ok and others have similar outgoings.

However , I am also going to look at all the costs and see where I can cut them.

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GoGoGazelle · 03/12/2017 08:17

I have the same thought each month op but have to remind myself that lots of my expenses are lifestyle choices. Phones are an obvious one once you're out of contract - I pay £15pcm.

Middleoftheroad · 03/12/2017 08:29

For us we stepped down the activities. we dont do any clubs and we stopped going to cinema and just getting big bowl popcorn with film at hime. we found free swimming, we play cricket in park board games etc.

We cancelled Sky etc

We have no additional insurance to work benefits. no pet ins. no boiler insurance etc.

Instead of meals out we might go for odd Wetherspoons breakfast for a tenner for four say.

We've been doing this to save.

My friend was going on about her finances and I know she has full fat Sky package, goes to cinema each week and does countless clubs. She cannot see actually what an expense this is. She views it as normal to go on a £75 cinema trip (buys all snacks) and pay nearly £90 for tv etc. crazy!

Middleoftheroad · 03/12/2017 08:32

We also have 4 phones - £10 per month. We trade lots too in Computer Exchange so I got my last phone there and put a SIM in.

I'm also ebaying each week. It is a pain but old toys/jewellery etc are currently bringing in 30 each week