Do my finances sound about right?

[ExtraPineappleExtraHam]

Wages: £1200
Childcare: £500
Mortgage: £600
Credit card: £100

Partners:
Wages: £1800
Bills: £350
Food: £200
Bus: £100
Rest is what we use for days out, unexpected bills, clothes, replacing white goods, save for holidays etc. We currently save the child benefit for the children's uni, deposit, car payment etc.
Please tell me if this is normal. We don't have much contingency if something goes wrong. Can we live like this long term?

What are you asking is normal? spending all your wages? Normal for some, not for others. It's up to you to work out whether you can live like it long term. No-one knows what your circumstances are or may become.

Personally if I had children with someone it would be shared account with bills coming out of it and left over into savings. There would be no "I pay this bill and you pay that bill".

Since you have an excess each month, I'd say that looks sustainable on the face of it, but what looks a bit odd is the way your wages seem to be covering childcare and mortgage and DP's are covering much less.

Does this mean that the way you and DP understand it, DP has an excess and you don't? Is this about who controls the excess?

I'm sorry, I know it's a total mumsnet cliché but if you live together why are you splitting things like this?

Mortgage: £600
Childcare: £500
Bills: £350
Food: £200
Travel: £100

Total household outgoings - £1750
Total household incomings - £3000

If I were you guys I would arrange it so you get £200 spends in your own accounts and the rest goes into savings for all the 'rest' you mention above:

OP transfers £1000 into the house account on payday, DP transfers £1600 into the house account on payday, which leaves you both with £200 personal spends and £850 for savings and all the 'rest' you mention above.

Re your credit card I would either include it in the household expenditure if it's a debt incurred whilst you've been together, or service it with your £200 spends if you brought it into the relationship from the past.

I really don't understand why your DP has £1100 spare each month when you have £0

Define "normal"

It looks tightish but not ridiculous. Presumably childcare fees will drop before too long?

The two things that jump out are that;

1. you have no emergency pot but you DO have savings for child's future, which seems (technical term) arse-about-face. (Essentials before luxuries. Make sure you can house and feed everyone through to 18 come what may THEN think about house deposits and cars.)

2)It's a weird split between you.

Why not have a joint account?

We split it this way because I'm really crap with money, that's a fact. I have no discipline so if I have all the extra cash then we'll live like kings for a week and then paupers for 3 weeks. My partner is always working and has no interest in shopping or buying expensive food or coffee. It works better for us to keep things separate and I have his card most days. It just makes me more financial responsible if I know he sees the bank statement.
I'm definitely going to start a savings pot though, especially for rainy days or if the house needs work doing to it. A couple of months ago we had a plumbing problem and it wiped out our whole months money after bills. We had to borrow some which was embarrassing and also I used my credit card loads. If we had a savings pot then it could pay for things like that.

Well you have £1200 per month for living on (after essentials) and savings that's not to be sniffed at. Are you spending this every month? Are you just saving child Ben and nothing else?

You say you are crap with money and have no discipline as if that's an unchangeable fact. That is entirely within your control and your choice to change or remain the same. If you were single you would have to develop some responsibility for your spending. If you are worried about managing long term then your spending habits will need to change in order to give yourself a safety net of savings.

Maybe I'm the only one thinking this but I'd be quite happy with £1200 after all our outgoings as we have much higher outgoings so don't have close to that left.

I am trying to change my spending habits. Like I said, I use my partner's card as it helps me not to go mad.
I think there must be something I've not accounted for as it always seems like we have no money. Maybe it's because I personally don't have any. We do live quite frugally and don't have a car. If I get a car that will be an extra £100 a month in insurance, because I only recently passed my test recently.

I would try YNAB (www.youneedabudget.com) - it will help you to see all the hidden expenses, like the things that you don't have to pay every month, and will show you where your money is actually going.

For example, I have a parking permit and road tax that I pay every 6 months, plus a journal subscription each quarter, and National Trust, etc each year. It helps you to save throughout the year for these (and calculates how much to pay each month and tells you if you're on track) so even when the big payments come out and you see them on your bank statement, you don't panic about it.

It's also great for saving for different things (home maintenance, holidays, etc) as you can categorise your saving without needing to open separate accounts for it.

It's good to have a rainy day fund for stuff like boilers etc but in the cash strapped world we live in (or at least I live in) I've always considered paying into my pension and mortgage as enough for the future and use what we have spare a month to save for holidays etc. There's needs to be a balance so that youre financially secure yet enjoying life plus saving the children's child benefit for them is great.

You have £1200 after all your expenses left and you're concerned that you don't have sufficient finances?! I don't have half of that, I think you're fine!

Unless you have a mental health problem, you are perfectly capable of controlling your spending. Do it.

If one of you gets made redundant, goes under a bus, gets sick, how screwed are you?