Loaning Personal Trainer Money

[user1481754243]

I have had a personal trainer (female) for the last three years, in this time we have become fairly good friends, Yesterday she confessed she is struggling financially due to her car breaking down and various gyms not paying her on time for here services. She is really stressed about this, I offered to pay for some classes up front e.g 6 months worth, but she turned this down stating she prefers my reg standing order for cash flow which is fine.

The thing is I'm worried about her she is stressed manically looking for part time work, do i offer her a loan, i'm lucky money is not a worry. I don't want to spoil our relationship. I could also put an envelope through her door with no name on who it is from, I know she has talked about money with others, what would you do?

However well meaning you are, don't get involved. Don't offer her a loan. It will change the nature of your friendship, especially if she is unable to keep up the repayments.

There have been too many threads on mumsnet complaint about best friends/sisters/uncles who have never paid money back, despite several promises. The loan always feel bitter and cheated.

You offered her a solution. Ie, to pay upfront.

If you put money through the door, it will be a gift, not a loan. Don't expect it back.

As awful as this is it is not your problem, please don't do anything.

It absoloutely will ruin your relationship.
However lovely she is, however close you are, however nice you are, it will end badly.
Don't do it.

I once asked my dad if I should loan my friend money. He said only if I could afford to loose it. It's not your problem and who says her financial situation will ever change enough to pay you back.

If you can afford to give her something then do that rather than loan. What about a supermarket gift card to take the pressure off the Christmas shop or something? It would feel more gifty that way.

I loaned a good friend some money to pay course fees in London. Off he went and I have never heard from him since despite numerous attempts to contact him or find him. Never again

Have you really had a good look at your motivations for doing this? Bottom line, best place to borrow money is from a bank. Money is cheap now. Only yesterday the bank of england held rates low for another few months. If she isnt creditworthy well thats too bad. We all have to balance the books.

If you can afford to give her money (not as a loan, simply a gift) then your suggestion of simply putting an unmarked envelope through her door is lovely, maybe with a little anonymous note to say that it's to help her out and to pay it forward when she is in a better situation.

I would never loan money to a friend, only gift it if I could afford to help out.