Maintanence

[JollyOldSaintNikkielas]

When I split from my xh (5 1/2 years ago) he became very unreliable at paying so I got the CSA involved and when he eventually sobered up he set upa astanding order to pay the amount they recommended (£14 a week for 2 kids).Since then we have never changed the amount although he does contribute towards clubs etc(as in I pay then he gives me £20 for a couple of weeks).
I have used the CSA calculator and worked out they now recommend £42 a week.
As its such a difference am quite temped to broach the subject but he is so tempramental it will prob end in lots of argument/stress.

Would you bother?

bump

I could do with it but wonderingif its worth the hassle.

How would you broach it?
He does tend to give me more but its irregular (usually £20 a week but not every week)

id stick with what your getting,the csa are absolutely useless. you will suffer so much stress trying for the extra money it honestly wouldnt be worth it

Why don't you approach with a worse case scenario, i.e. you should be paying £42 pw, but then ask for less, i.e. but I'd be happy to accept £30 pw.

Get him worried at first and then he might see that what you are asking for isn't too bad.

thats a good idea festive

Don't actually use CSA just their guidleines.IYSWIM
I know he'll moan because he wants to save for a house (he lioves with his parents) but its bugging me atm that he complains about being skint when he has been away for a week in th lakes (ie expensive!) and he may have to use his savings to buy Xmas pressies when I am just about paying for everything!
I earn more than him as well (3 day week againgst his 5) which he will bring up but its only a few pounds and I am paying for a morgage/car/house stuff out of it as well as providing all the kids stuff, so pay out a lot!

Problem with going in higher is that, if he checks things out and discovers that it was a lie, he will feel justified in refusing to pay anything.

Some men will do anything to get out of paying for their offspring. My sister asked her ex to increase his maintenance for two children by £100 per month - it hadn't been increased for 3 years and, as the children were getting older, they were doing more activities and costs were increasing. He refused, so she had to take him to court. Her maintenance was increased by £50 pm, with a provision that it should increase by a certain percentage every year after that. So you may think that he was right to refuse. However, it cost him over £4,000 in solicitor's and barrister's fees (yes, he used a barrister when my sister was acting for herself!), which would have funded the £100 pm my sister was requesting for over 4 years. Arse.

May broach it tomorrow, or if i wait til after Xmas bring up something about reorganising my money as I need to pay for the new terms clubs?