xmas without my kids :(

[Slinkstar]

The contact agreement has been running for 2 years. it says alternating xmas contact so he has 20th-26th and then i have 26th-1st, and swap each year etc.

is it possible to go back to court to change it? I can't spend another xmas without my kids- they want to stay with me for xmas too, especially as its their new brothers first xmas.
I have asked the kids dad if i can have them morning xmas day and then he has them afternoon as thats what the kids would prefer but he says no!
have i got a leg to stand on at all??

for you Slinkstar

Can't help but bumping for you. I'm sure someone with some legal knowledge will be along soon

I'm trying to get my DS's for christmas this year. I was allowed 2 hours last year. So far i have been offered overnight christmas eve until 11am.Ive said no because he had the bulk of last chrismas.
Did you have last christmas? It would be nice if you got to see them for at least part of the day.

I am assuming that this means you had your dc last christmas day (?)

I think that in order to get a court order changed you would have to have very good reason and I don't think this would be sorted by this xmas in all honesty (especially as x doesn't seem likely to simply agree).

How old are the children? Are they of an age where there opinions would mean something in court?

Sorry, not helpful but I think you may have no choice.

hopefully another mner will know more.

Best wishes, it must be very hard.

yes i had last xmas, the one before without my kids was horrible. I don't know what age the kids opinions count in court. They are 9 and 7.

i have been reasonable and asked him to share the day, but he has said no way, he does not seem to care what the kids want, its always been about control for him.

Ive also been worried about my ds because his dad has recently got a pet and ds now comes home barely breathing because of an allergy to fur. ive told their dad to keep ds away from the pet completely but he refuses to belive its an allergy to the pet. ds came home at the weekend saying his dad gave him some pills, because of the lack of comunication i am completely reliant on ds telling me what he's had in terms of medicine!

but back to the topic, its babys first xmas it will be so weird without my big babies.
i have been reasonable with his requests throughout the year and even took them out of school for them to see their grandad earlier this year at his request, and swaped weekend contact to suit him. yet he can't even give me a few hours on xmas day with them!

I think things only work if you stick to orders. Would you have liked him last year to ask to change so that he had them? I bet you wouldn't.

I think Xmas without your kids must be horrible whether you are a Mum or dad, whether the kids live with you most of the time or not..

I don;t know anything about contact orders though I'm afraid.

When DH' kids were spending Christmas with their Mum, he used to go up to their Mum's house on Christmas Day and at lest see them for an hour or so.

Is this in any way an option for you?

Really sorry for you, Slinkstar

But short of splitting the children in two or the parents bearing to be together there is no other option than dividing the time. No reason a mother rather than a father should have them either.

Goodness me Xenia, you sound like a right old bit of baggage today, you seem to be stirring it right, left and centre. Are you ok ??

Message withdrawn