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Original poster

Protecting my deposit/inheritance and my son.

24 replies

Fugghetaboutit · 24/02/2015 16:19

Hi, just hoping for some advice.

I'm buying a house with my fiancé soon. He will be named on the mortgage, I won't as I'm a sahm and it got rejected when we applied with me on it.
I will put my name on the deeds as joint tenants as soon as possible through my solicitor.

My issue is, I have put in 55k for the deposit. My P is putting in 15k for stamp duty and fees but essentially it is my inheritance getting us the house.

How can I protect this money if we were to split say after a year or so, so I don't have to split the house 50/50?

Also, as I'm a sahm and have no earning power yet (I'm starting my masters soon and then will start working in 5 ish years) can I get my P to agree to pay at least half the mortgage if we were to split before I was earning and working full time?

I don't want my ds to have to leave his school and house if anything were to happen. I want security for him.

Any advice appreciated.

OP posts:

MythicalKings · 24/02/2015 16:23

Have the house put in joint ownership of the 3 of you.

Fairylea · 24/02/2015 16:26

I'm confused.... I'm a sahm and I am on the mortgage and the deeds. (Similar situation to you- I provided the equity for the house, dh pays the mortgage for the remainder).

You can see a solicitor to ask for your equity to be protected via the deeds.

annielostit · 24/02/2015 16:30

If I remember rightly, you can be put on the deeds straight away. This will protect you if you split up. We had a joint mortgage on oh wages but I'm named.
I had mine on our house when I still had my own house that wasn't quite sold/completed.
Make sure you write a will saying you want your share left to your son if you go first and any other wishes you have.

Original poster

Fugghetaboutit · 24/02/2015 16:40

Good idea re will. Hadn't thought of that at all, thank you.

Yes, the bank rejected our application with me on it - apparently as I was not working it had a negative affect. Maybe it's the particular bank we are using?

I'll make sure I'm on the deeds and I will email the solicitor before it goes through to protect my equity.

Kings what would that do out of interest?

OP posts:

MythicalKings · 24/02/2015 16:47

I think it means you own a third each. So if it has to be sold you each get one third. Some friends did this to safeguard an inheritance.

Original poster

Fugghetaboutit · 24/02/2015 16:50

Sounds like a good idea.

I'm thinking of us actually getting married before buying - so therefore I am secured with the property even though I'm not on mortgage - and then setting up a pre-nuptial agreement protecting my equity and for me to stay there if anything happens, how does that sound ?

OP posts:

Original poster

Fugghetaboutit · 24/02/2015 16:52

Or instead of joint share, maybe make my share 60/40?

OP posts:

Fairylea · 24/02/2015 16:53

I would be wary about putting a share of the property into your son's name. It sounds like a great idea now but may cause problems later on if (hopefully not) you fall out or want to sell - he could delay the sale of the property as he would be an owner. It is far better to make sure there is clause entered into on the deeds to ensure that your deposit is protected. I say that as someone who was put onto the deeds of my mother's house as a teen because of my gran dying and signing her share over to me (she owned the property with my mum) and long term it caused us endless arguments as I grew up and wanted my share when mum wanted to move and so on (marriages, divorce, children etc).

ajandjjmum · 24/02/2015 16:54

But if your (soon to be) DH is paying the mortgage over the next five years as you study, he might not be happy with this?

0ddsocks · 24/02/2015 16:56

I did this as my husband and I were not married at the time we bought our first house and I put in the majority of the deposit - I can't remember what the name of the document was, but our solicitor drew it up for us,

CalamitouslyWrong · 24/02/2015 17:01

Have you considered going for ownership as tenants in common with a percentage that is different to 50-50 (or some arrangement that after any mortgage is paid of the reminder is divided so that you get the first 40k and then split the remainder 50-50?).

None of this means that you wouldn't have to sell the house and move if you were to split up, however. You'd be unlikely to get a mortgage to buy him out and keep the house since you couldn't get a mortgage with you involved this time around.

Fairylea · 24/02/2015 17:05

If you split up you would receive maintenance from your dh and would have to use this to pay the mortgage. If the maintenance isn't enough to cover the mortgage you would have to look to cover this yourself through work and / or benefits. If you couldn't then you would have to sell. If you sold, providing you have your deposit protected, you would receive your deposit back plus your share of whatever equity there is.

CalamitouslyWrong · 24/02/2015 17:15

Her DP may also want to release his share of the equity from the house should they split up. There's no way to guarantee that you can stay in a house unless you can afford to pay for the entire thing yourself.

cavkc · 24/02/2015 17:22

You can get a charge put on the house to protect your money

Original poster

Fugghetaboutit · 24/02/2015 18:28

I've spoken to dp about it just now briefly and he would be happy to pay the mortgage for up to a year after split if it occurred so as ds wouldn't have two shocks of divorce and moving house/pulled out of school if I needed to sell I would then after if I couldn't afford the mortgage.

Calamitous that sounds like something that would suit us.

I'm going to talk to a solicitor this week about the situation

OP posts:

ImperialBlether · 24/02/2015 19:02

Well, your fiancé needs to be careful - what if you were unfaithful to him and moved a new man in when your fiancé moved out - would he still want to pay the bills?

Also, although I can understand you want to protect your investment, there's surely a problem as your fiancé will be paying more towards the mortgage than you over the next few years. If he's paying a few thousand per year for the mortgage, surely that should go towards his equity?

Original poster

Fugghetaboutit · 24/02/2015 19:10

Yes imperial but from day 1 he doesn't have any equity towards the deposit. I am putting a large chunk of my money in and need to protect that. Without that, we would never be able to buy a house. He will pay the mortgage as he is the main earner at the moment. His career has come on leaps and bounds due to my help and having me have ds full time.

I want to return to work when ds is in nursery and I will then hopefully be able to cover the mortgage if anything happens.

If I moved someone else in, I would notify him and he wouldn't have to pay it anymore, just child maintenance. I can't see myself moving another man in that quickly, that's more my mothers style.

This whole arrangement would be to protect my ds' security. If we broke up that would be devastating enough for a small child, but to have to move out straight away and maybe change schools would be horrible for him. I'm trying to prevent that happening. I'm sure it never will.

OP posts:

Original poster

Fugghetaboutit · 24/02/2015 19:11

To add, he's a very high earner and paying that mortgage wouldn't hinder him paying another if he were to buy another place with his pay out.

OP posts:

CalamitouslyWrong · 24/02/2015 19:36

He is putting something in, though. He's putting in 15k to your 55k. Just because it's going on stamp duty and fees doesn't make it irrelevant. You can't buy the house without it.

If you do split up though it's important to remember that your DP will at some point want his equity back out of the house (and that's fair enough). He's not going to want to simply walk away handing you the entire thing. So your rainy day plan needs to take into account being able to buy him out or to buy another house with just your half of the equity and whatever mortgage you can raise on your own.

Original poster

Fugghetaboutit · 24/02/2015 19:40

So your rainy day plan needs to take into account being able to buy him out or to buy another house with just your half of the equity and whatever mortgage you can raise on your own.

No, of course, that was always a given I guess I didn't state it in my op. He will be paying the mortgage and in a few years he will have put in the same as me. But, say we were to split in a year, I would want to protect it, not him leave with 50/50

OP posts:

CalamitouslyWrong · 24/02/2015 19:50

That makes it harder though, as the legal ownership of the house needs to be fixed at the start.

I'd also say that the rainy day plan should be for the worst case scenario. Contingency plans should assume an acrimonious breakup where he refuses to pay anything. He might say he's willing to pay the mortgage for up to a year if you split now when you're buying a house together and planning to marry, but who knows what might actually be the case if it happens. Lots of women who've been down that road didn't expect their ex-partners to turn out to be total arses but still end up with no support and no maintenance.

My father purposefully bankrupted a very successful business and claimed JSA purely so that he wouldn't have to pay my mum anything and, indeed, she'd have to buy him out of their house. Sure, he was much worse off too but the crucial thing was that the woman who rejected him didn't get anything. He also got himself sacked from various jobs on purpose whenever the CSA caught up with him. My mother obviously didn't think he was that kind of man or she'd never have married him in the first place. Turns out that he is though.

It's all a bit 'plan for the worst, hope for the best' really.

Original poster

Fugghetaboutit · 24/02/2015 21:58

Thank you for your input Calamitous I appreciate it and you're right, you never know what will happen especially during an acrimonious split. I just want to have measures in place to secure my equity.
If he refuses to help with mortgage payments until I can cover them then I will have to look at other options and I'm sure ds will be ok. I think it's good I say what I expect from him beforehand so it's clear, rather than getting to that point and never discussing 'what ifs' but essentially you're right, you really never know what will happen.

OP posts:

Original poster

Fugghetaboutit · 24/02/2015 21:59

I'm going to discuss with solicitor this week. Maybe not having 50/50 joint tenancy to start but 60/40 then if we remortgage and he's paid in equal amount then levelling it or something

OP posts:

skatpot · 28/02/2015 21:38

I sold my house to buy one with DP (who was living with his mum, no savings etc). My solicitor drew up a deed of trust. Should we ever split & sell the house, I will get my initial investment back before any profit made is divided between us.

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