How much do you charge your adult working children in rent.

[madmumb]

Hi, new here and hoping for some help. I am registered disabled and live on ESA and DLA.
I have 3 adult children living at home all with full time jobs.
I charge them £45 per week each. This includes everything, food, washing, council tax ect.

Is this a reasonable amount or am I taking advantage of them?

Thanks in advance.

Whether it's a fair amount depends on what the costs are - if you add up the total of all the outgoings that relate to the home, then divide it by four, how much is that per week? Assuming they all pull their weight with chores.

All chores are done by my husband/carer. All they have to do is put their own laundry away, and all earn in excess of £250 per week

I think they are taking advantage of you and your husband - why on earth is he doing all their chores? .

You should be charging them considerably more, where else could anyone live for £45 to include rent, food, washing etc.

You are both being taken for mugs. Do you actually want them to stay living with you - are they saving a decent amount of their 'surplus' income for a deposit or somehow planning to ever leave home?

I was living with my parents for a year following my split with my husband. I paid them £500 per month. I earn more than double what your children earn, though. Proportionally, what you are charging sounds very reasonable.

I would say 1/4 of what they earn.

To rent a place you roughly shouldn't pay more than 1/3 of income and that includes no bills/ food/ etc

So if one earns £200 charge £50, once earns £400 charge £100, one earns £500 charge £125. They can choose to leave if they feels it's terrible

Son gives me £200 month, he earns about £1150 month after tax ins

Similar situation son on min wage at 21 we have£40 week from him but he will pick things up and pay for them . He would give more but we think this is fair we want him to enjoy his life now when he has no big commitments as such . If you think this is OKfor you and your family that's what matters we see it as he is our son and as such we are happy to have him comftable at home .

I don't charge mine anything ,you do what works for your family .

fatty and floral - out of interest, do your adult children help with chores etc? I find it very odd that you don't want your adult children to understand what running costs etc are involved in 'living at home', do you honestly think that this is going to help your children when they eventually leave home and set up their own homes? I wouldn't want to be their future partner

I think that sounds about right, although is your DH really happy doing all the chores for everyone?

Ragwort I never said he didn't know about running costs he is fully aware I did say we wanted him to enjoy his life . He also does help both grandmothers as well as ourselves with several chores they just don't happen to be a lot in the house . Also thanks for the concern but his girlfriend of 4 years is fully aware of his faults but they are out weighed by his loving nature .

My DS is extremely good at budgeting thank you and will be 23/24 years old and able to buy a house in the SE if he chooses to . I never paid my parents any rent / keep and I have managed to run a house for 25+ years and pay off 2 different mortgages ( with DH obviously) ,so it's not necessary IME to take money from your DC to teach them things . We are fortunate that we are in the position to not need to take money off our DC ,I'm sure if I needed a contribution he would make one , it works for us .

Oh dear I seem to have touched a nerve here .

I am sure it does work for you both in not charging your children rent and of course every family does what is right for them.

However we continually see on Mumsnet threads from wives complaining that their husbands don't understand household finance, can't budget, save, buy food, cook, do housework etc etc.

I am just suggesting that there may be a link between the way people are raised at home and their future relationships. .

As a point of interest, DH and I could easily pay for our DS's expensive school & sports trips but we feel it is important for him to learn the value of savings and make a significant contribution towards 'expensive' treats. Likewise if he would rather have a school lunch than a packed lunch he has to use some of his pocket money towards that.

If you read my message he earns main wage therefore about 200 a week and pays £40 per week he also buys other things if he is out will always get things he knows we are low on and will always ask if I need anything and will never take money in return so he does know how to save / budget . As you say you expect your child to contribute to his school EDUCATION TRIP'S would you really like someone to rip apart how you choose to bring up your child . How has this thread suddenly turned on myself and floral not the op .

No nerves touched here ,I have raised well rounded individuals who are more than capable of taking care of themselves and like I said earlier do what works for your family .

I can understand why floral and fatty might be less than pleased with your posts Rag. Whether you mean to or not, your posts come across as preachy and presumptive "I wouldn't want to be their future partner" as an example.

Thanks siarie that is a very good example of why my nerves were touched Iam fiercely protective of my kids being attacked . I'mleaving the thread as it will esculate into a bitch fest !

I am not 'turning on' or attacking anyone - this is a discussion thread and surely all views should be appreciated. Note the 'grin' at the end of my earlier comment; I am not ranting, just expressing a view and certainly not 'ripping apart' how you choose to raise your child. And, over the years on Mumsnet, I have personally had lots of comments against the way I raise my child, I don't take it personally - this is a discussion forum, robust views are encouraged. My views on CC, for example, are frequently criticised and I have been called an 'uncaring mother'.

You must agree, although I understand you don't feel it applies to your own adult children, that there are a lot of unhappy threads on Mumsnet where women are saying are disappointed/stressed etc they are when their husband/partner does not contribute to housework or the day to day running of the home.

To bring it back to the question, my dm always said if I moved back home as an adult she would charge me the going rate, and then put a percentage of that aside to help me build a deposit.

I would also be expected to do my fair share in terms of chores.

It never happened, but it seemed a sensible approach.

They are taking huge advantage of you both.

I don't think it necessarily correlates that not expected to do chores equals lazy partner.

I did bugger all when I was growing up at home. As soon as I had my own home (not as a student admittedly, but after that) i turned into Mrs Mop/Mrs Beeton/Mr Sheen in one fell swoop.

OP I dont think you are taking advantage of your DC! If they could get rent and maid for that per week elsewhere I'm sure they'd let you know

I wasn't charged any rent by my DP but I had a pt job until I was 21 due to further study. My Dsis starting working ft at 16 and my parents took money from her and saved it. I am extremely good with money and my Dsis is terrible!

I paid 200 a month excluding food. I did chores. Mum washed my clothes but didn't iron. I earned 1200 at the time.

It didn't teach me anything about budgeting or saving, I had to learn that a but later on.

I hope to encourage saving throughout childhood rather than buy now, pay later.

Paying board isn't really teaching a lesson ime.

I was charged £200 a month on a wage of £780 after tax etc.

I really struggled financially. I had to buy my own toiletries, washing powder etc.

I had to do my own washing and ironing etc.

I would not charge dd rent when she works unless i really needed the money

counting can I ask where you struggled financially if you had £580 after rent? Surely washing powder/food is not that expensive. Did you have other financial commitments