Christmas buying for friends children

[Cheerfulcherub2014]

We have always bought gifts for our friends children at Christmas, however many of them now have 2 or 3 and we're now up to 23 kids to buy for! Not including our actual family - neices and nephews. We've had a baby this year so I've been on maternity for the last 6 months with reduced pay and we live in a one bed house so need to save as hard as we can in order to move.

Do you think it's reasonable to talk to our friends and ask them not to buy for ours, explain the situation and stop buying for theirs? I did think about just spending a few pounds on each but it's hard to find a gift for that...!

Any thoughts greatly appreciated! Thanks x

Nothing wrong with it. We don't buy for anyone and there's only 6 in our family. Buy a bottle and a buffet item each and spend time together not gifts. Make up party games for the little ones and enjoy.

Buying for that number is insane. Bet others will thank you for saying stop.

In our group of friends we did originally buy for each other's children. However how there's a few too many so we do the kids a Christmas party. We hire a local place (a soft place/bouncy castle type) all contribute to food and buy a gift to add to a sack.

Then the kids get to play, have lunch and get a gift. We get to chat and spend some time together before the madness of Christmas. Usually it's about £20 all in.

Could you maybe suggest something similar?

Ours got out of hand too so now we don't buy for the kids and we do a secret Santa for the adults instead!

Figured the kids got enough and it makes it loads cheaper.

I have 4 close friends from school who all have kids. We decided a few years ago (as more children kept being conceived!) to do a secret Santa so that each child got 1 present from the group rather than a present from each family. Anyone with 2 kids gets a present for 2 other kids, if you've got one child you get a present for one child etc..It works well and saves us all money. Could you try something like this?

Wow, that is a lot of children to buy for! If you feel like you want to buy something, maybe go for a basic selection box. But if everyone is buying that many gifts for that many children, there is a risk of the children being totally overwhelmed with presents and not appreciating them. And you may well find that the other parents may be grateful for you putting a stop to it all.

Get them each a stocking filler pressie from Hawkin this year and then all agree to stop

Or a board game/ box of quality street per family.

Last year I text my friends with kids and agreed to set a £5 per child limit. It was a relief to find sweet things for a fiver that didnt have to look like they could be worth 15/20 quid just incase thats what their parent spent on mine. I would hate to think that buying my child a gift was a financial burden to someone else, I would rather they just didnt buy anything, my friends are more important than my kid having more and more stuff he doesnt need.

definitely take control. Even a fiver each is over £100 on sparkly tat.

Thanks all, going to talk to our friends and knock it on the head!! X

In our friendship group, we only give gifts on birthdays. It got too expensive at Christmas so we spend a little more on birthdays. I do tend to pick things up in 3for2 or half price events tho.

I bet everyone qould be delighted if you put a stop to it - too many presents for everyone to buy. I like the idea of a big meet up in the new year with everyone contributing.