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Am I the only parent not saving anything for their dc?

48 replies

WhoeverYouWantMeToBe · 22/09/2014 17:07

My ds is 9, and he has just £460 odd in his child trust fund. I stopped paying in few years ago even then it was only £5 a month!

I feel really guilty especially as a friend's dd is about to turn 18 and has a £10,000 trust fund coming to her, friend not particular wealthy just good at saving!
I'm single working full-time and feel terrible that I can't afford to save anything for him, I could maybe start saving £10 a month into it at a push.

My parents never saved anything for me, when I turned 18 I had £700 worth of shares left by my grandad bless his heart, which bought my first car.

Please tell me I'm not alone in not saving much if anything?

OP posts:
AlpacaLypse · 22/09/2014 17:12

No you're not alone. Dtds have about £800 each in a savings account and that's about it.

However, they will benefit from DP and I downsizing and freeing up a load of cash when we no longer need such a big house.

iwantgin · 22/09/2014 17:14

i don't save anything for DS. I believe my DM set up an account for him when he was a baby - but I have no idea what is in there.
He is 16 - so missed out on the Child trust fund promotion.

dragonflyinthelillies · 22/09/2014 17:16

£10000 is a lot of money to receive when your only 18. Pretty much everyone I knew who did get some kind of trust fund blew it all on a brand new car, clothes, nights out ect...

Lally112 · 22/09/2014 17:18

nah, I cant afford to either. I mean I put their birthday and xmas money in their building society account but I have to live off 60 quid a week so I cant be putting even a fiver in. I'd have nothing left.

atticusclaw · 22/09/2014 17:20

I don't pay anything into the trust funds since I don't want the DSs suddenly having a large sum of money when they are 18. We do save for them though. We have two accounts (in our names not theirs) into which we pay a regular monthly amount but since its in our names we can control if and when we give them the money. If heaven forbid one of them was a drug addict at 18 there is no way I'd want them suddenly having legal control of £10k +.

littlemoot · 23/09/2014 18:50

Got a small amount saved for them ( only as I'm a good saver - I try and keep putting some change away) . Not that they know much about it. They're teenagers now and probably I wouldn't want them to use it until 21 and they really need it / use it for something proper

TalkinPeace · 23/09/2014 21:05

Nope.
I do not have savings accounts for my kids.
I have savings accounts for me from which I can provide for my children's needs.
I am putting money aside to sort them for when they leave Uni
but Child Trust funds were invented after they started school.

Fairylea · 24/09/2014 21:48

Nope. Nothing saved here either. Just can't afford it!

foxdongle · 25/09/2014 19:31

Ours have more than your friends dd each 12 and 14 yrs old (eldest has slightly more) and we've always said it's towards a house deposit. But it does bother me that they might just blow it, although a car for work would be ok, so any more is going into our names until they are actually signing for said house.

I had money from parents and gps when I was 18- went towards buying my first car a couple of years later and 21-went into first house buying fund which I bought at 24.

TeracottaTurtle · 27/09/2014 01:38

We don't have specific savings for the dc. ATM everything we have is going into paying off our mortgage as soon as possible, which seems more sensible to us.

If we let it run to term, the dc will be in their 20's by the time it's paid off. But we're hoping to knock a few years off by overpaying when we can.

In terms of money for a car for them, money for Uni...no idea. We have a vague idea that if we're mortgage free before Uni and money is needed for something, we could get a relatively small re-mortgage on the house to have a cash chunk available.

At the moment though it just seems like nonsense to put money into a rubbish-rate savings account that won't be used for donkeys years, and seems much more sensible to plough any spare cash into reducing the biggest debt we have.

Gen35 · 27/09/2014 08:01

We're overpaying our mortgage to try and be mortgage free by uni time as I looked into savings in the dcs' names and I hate the fact they can do whatever they want with it at 18, I wouldn't have been sensible at that age. Savings in our names are paying less interest than we're paying on our mortgage so....

Minionionionion · 27/09/2014 08:28

We do, but only because if relatives ask what dd needs for her birthday/Christmas we mention her savings and they nearly always contribute £10 or so that we bank for her, we also take £10 a month off her child benefit, we are lucky that this doesn't make much of a difference to us though.

If we couldn't afford it then I would stop the direct debit without a thought though. Sometimes a better now is as important as the future IMO

18yearstooold · 27/09/2014 08:40

I've no savings for my DC or myself

If I've managed to keep out of the overdraft at the end of the month then I consider that a successful month

I'm a lone parent and a full time student -my DCs will just have to manage like I did although I am disappointed as I wanted more for them

JadeJ123 · 27/09/2014 08:58

DSD has, me, her dad, her mum and all I our families put money in the account. She's only 10 at the moment so won't get it for another 8 years but she won't be allowed to blow it on crap.

herethereandeverywhere · 27/09/2014 09:09

My parents weren't in a position to save for me. By the time I sat at my desk for the first day of my 'proper' job I was £20k in debt (15 years ago now). I earned my own money, I am fine.

Give them loads of love and positivity. Support their dreams, encourage them to believe anything is possible if they put their minds to it.

Equip them with the tools and the drive to earn it themselves.

PS: Any money in their own name is theirs to spend as they please when they turn 18. If your fortunes do change I'd save the money yourself then allocate on a needs basis. Setting up home/ going off to study = okay to spend on, the latest fashion items and nights out = not okay (that's my rough plan anyway!)

zavi00000 · 27/09/2014 09:14

I don't save at all for my DC. I could do, money is not tight, but I choose not to.

My DC will be able to get a job when they turn sixteen and if they want a car when they turn 17 then they better start saving for the car (and its insurance) from their earnings from their part time job.

I don't believe in giving my kids a savings "leg up". I think that approach does more damage than good. I want my DC to know that anything they achieve in this world must be through their own efforts.

There are huge rewards -in terms of feelings of self-empowerment and achievement - awaiting those who work and save to get what they want.

I have no intention of depriving my DC of that opportunity by handing things to them on a plate.

WhereHas1999DissappearedToo · 27/09/2014 09:15

Nope no savings here for DD, she use to have about £500 in the bank and then we became skint, so we had to raid it and was left with about £30Grin

Haven't put any in since as I can't really afford it (I could probably put in a tenner a month but she's 15 so she won't get much out of it). When she turns 18 she might get some money from the grandma.

£10 000 is a lot of money for an 18 year old, unless it's going towards Uni fees.

Mrsgrumble · 27/09/2014 09:17

I am going to save a little for mine. I had nothing frm my parents and it was hard. Nt saying I begrudge it, but I really want to help them buy car, go to Uni etc

Lonecatwithkitten · 27/09/2014 13:39

I was lucky enough that my parents supported me through University. I would like to o the same for my DD so I save £100 per month it has been tough at times.

MillieV · 28/09/2014 14:36

I don't think we should compare the situation children of today find themselves in with our situation XX years ago. Yes, you may have coped fine that many years ago, but you probably benefitted from zero or low university tuition fees, cheap house prices and less competition for jobs. It was a completely different world. There are many lawyers out there (even partners at law firms) who got 2.2s at uni. You can't even get a job at said law firm with anything lower than a 2.1 these days. That's just an example. Many people who 'made it' back then will have difficulties now.

So if you can, please do save up. I do find it annoying though that with the current Junior ISAs they get control at the age of 16 and can spend it as they wish at the age of 18. That's the wrong age IMHO as many people that age are a little restless.. I wished the age was 25 (even 21 is a little too young).

2kidsintow · 28/09/2014 14:43

DD2 has the standard basic amount of the child trust fund money that she was given by the government when she was born (£270 something?) and was then topped up by £50 a year or so later.

We will be matching that amount for DD1 when DD2 gets hers.

Apart from that, I was going to say no. But then I remembered that DH puts away £10 each per month into a savings account to match the £10 a month pocket money they get in hand from me too.

PenelopeGarciasCrazyHair · 28/09/2014 15:04

No, ds1 had a savings account which had about £1k in it but we invested it into the house with the intention of giving him interest as we worked our way up the ladder. Went swimmingly until we lost all equity in the house.

Other DCs have the original amount in their trust funds (£250 or £500) but I've never topped them up and they don't have any grandparents to put any money in them either. Birthday money is spent at toysRus or Argos, they'd be up in arms at the thought of saving it for the future when there are Lego sets they are yet to acquire!

Windowbasket · 28/09/2014 20:07

£20 a month each into an account here - and trying (desperately attempting!) to overpay the mortgage so that we are free of it by the time they go to uni (if they go to uni). That's it, we do our best but it isn't easy.

foxdongle · 28/09/2014 23:26

There's a great difference between spoiling your DC and wanting to help out with the right things at the right time. Mine definitely aren't spoilt. My ds gets up early every morning to do a paper round- most of his friends cba.
We want to help our dc buy a house or whatever and we can easily afford to help them- besides more than 60% of their money came from generous relatives, not us.

I don't feel 'Damaged' by it at all- it's not like I was handed £1 million at the age of 18, I felt very lucky and grateful.
I've always worked hard, never, ever been in any debt, and paid my way. Perhaps because those money managing skills had been taught to me early on. Like we have been teaching our dc.
I might have had the occasional small lapse (who wouldn't at that age?) but generally I was sensible and appreciated it.

ChickenFajitaAndNachos · 29/09/2014 10:29

I have savings for my DC but I am not sure when I will give them the money. I have set it up more as fund to help them with university costs, if they want to go travelling one Summer, when they leave them home or get married rather than a pot to give them when they were 18.
I was very good with money as a young adult but my DB was terrible so that has put me of handing over a large lump sum at a young age. My DB is good with money now though and has been since about mid 20's.