DP moving in - what should he contribute?

[Spotsofa]

Really struggling with getting my head around what is reasonable and your thoughts would be gratefully appreciated.

Me - 2 DC (teens), own house without mortgage, no debt, CTC £40/week which I would lose, maintenance from exh

DP - no DC, mortgaged (less than £200/month) house which he will rent out, works earning a tad more than me, never lived with anyone before and just asked me to tell him how much I want which isn't helpful!!!

Don't want him to buy into my house, stung before and would hate to loose my DC home if things don't work out!

Thoughts - should the bills be split equally or I pay 3/4 due to there being me plus 2DC? Household updates,maintenance - split even though he doesn't own the house but is living here? Depreciation model for major things? HELP????

How about DP pays you 50% of whatever rent he gets over and above the mortage payment? So if his place rents out for 500 and his mortgage is 200, you each get 150. That's the 'rent'.

Then, all bills split 3/4 (DP shouldn't have to contribute towards your DCs cost as that's what your exh is paying maintenance for?)

Household updates/maintenance - 100% your cost as it's benefiting your property and presumably you'd have to do that maintenance even if DP wasn't on the scened. Same for him - he's responsible for maintenance/updates on his property which he's renting out.

Whatever rent he gets coming in over and above the mortgage-payment will be subject to income-tax, so I think that would be over-complicating things. Most especially when inevitably interest-rates rise.

How about half the Council Tax bill, one quarter of the utilities and a quarter of the household shopping? Round that up to the nearest hundred pounds. Whatever that comes to, it will be less than he's paying now and reducing your current costs. Win/win

If it puts your mind at rest about 'buying in', legally your DP would be classed as a lodger and not a co-owner, even if he paid all the mortgage and all the bills.

Thanks for all your comments - getting a better feel for it now :)

OP is it an option for you to rent somewhere new together and rent out your own house so that he has no claim on your house should things go wrong?

I'd say 50% energy / phone / water as he is joining your household as another adult and somewhat taking kn stepdad role. As for food not as much say 1/4 depending on how much alcohol he consumes.