How much should be saved/spent?

[Scarletskies]

Just that really. I struggle to spend much money without feeling guilty, and as a result (rather than because we're earning loads), I do put by a bit every month.

But this has become a bit of a vicious habit and I do want to enjoy life still/ be able to buy the things we need without feeling like we need to save every penny.

How much disposable income would you consider a comfortable amount? How much would you like to be saving? I literally seem to have not a clue what is a sensible answer for either question.

ATM we save 20% of our net income as we have two major expenditures upcoming and have to meet defined budget targets. Last year we saved

Long term - Monthly d/d into pensions & childrens' savings.
Long term - Pay off mortgage within 10 years before eldest starts uni and we hit our mid fifties. Therefore, we have a relatively high monthly mortgage figure but we anticipate reaping the benefits a decade down the line! (We offset savings to retain flexibility and be able to access our money should the need arise e.g loss of income/job).

Short term savings for garden landscaping (next 6 mths)
Med term savings for visiting family in the States next year.
Generic savings to cover 6mths' outgoings (financial safety net).

We did expend a huge amount on our house renovation/extension last year from which we are still recovering - another year of frugality planned but it was SO worth it!

that 6 months income is the first priority after debts. No-one has a secure job.

I don't think you need numbers so much as reassurance/confidence that it is not wrong to spend money in general. People who feel the way you do have often come from very poor or unstable backgrounds, or they've experienced hardship, or they are generally very insecure about their ability to earn money and sustain their lifestyle. They save money out of fear rather for a particular purpose.

If you're meeting your regular & irregular outgoings, have a nice home, a retirement provision, a 'college fund' for the kids, no debts and can point to savings that would meet 6 months outgoings, then you have pretty much covered all the bases.

People who routinely overspend are given exercises to help them get a savings habit. Perhaps you need to deliberately spend some money each month on 'frivolous non-essentials'... to get past the fear?

I'm the same scarlet. I won't buy anything for myself unless its under a certain amount, and even then I'll choose not to buy. My friend was when I wouldn't buy the 3.99 concealer from aldi. I just didn't want to make a mistake if it was rubbish and the colour was wrong!

Isn't the advise you should have 3-6 months worth of your outgoings saved to see you through in case of loss of income? Sorry cogito just read your post.

Thanks for advice guys. We don't have kids yet, we bought a house last year and are meeting outgoings. We've got just about six months savings, but are planning a wedding next year which has increased my anxiety about 'unnecessary' spending. Cogito my upbringing wasn't poor exactly, but my parents have never been good with money and I have an insecurity about supporting myself which comes from that I think. We've got some student loan debt but nothing apart from that and we should be comfortable. I just don't feel comfortable spending any cash, in case I should need it for something more important. Its a cycle of guilt!

I think it depends on your stage of life, what you are saving for, whether you have debts to pay off and how much disposable income you have.

I can sympathise with you on not wanting to waste money and questioning all of your spending, i do that too! But you still need to have a life, especially pre-children, so try and enjoy some of the money you work hard for!

We are currently expecting our first child so we are no longer saving for things like nice holidays/house deposits/weddings as we have done all of that. Just been saving for a maternity leave safety net, and now the next thing we are saving for is that in a few years we may want/need to move house for schools or expanding family purposes.

BUT, i try to keep it in perspective. You only live once and there is more to life than saving for the next stage. You have to enjoy the now too. What in trying to say is don't save to the extent that you aren't enjoying yourself or making yourself miss out on things you want to do it might never have the opportunity to do again.

I think it really depends on what you are saving for, i.e. plans for the future. However, I have been saving for years now, for nothing in particular, just because it feels really good knowing that you have savings. This way you can afford something big, a holiday on the spur of the moment or helping a friend/relative. I think people spend way too much on crap. So saving up is an attitude more than anything else. It doesn't have to make you a stingy person, just help you feel confident that you are never bankrupt.

I am a natural saver. Given that you don't have kids and are planning a wedding I woukd be eliminating unnecessary spending too. In addition to 6 month "cushion", do you have long term savings (pension or equivalent?)

We have pensions, DP's is particularly good.

It isn't the saving as such I struggle with, it's the crippling, niggling anxiety when spending money not especially earmarked for anything and then feeling 'that could have been saved'

Ultimately I fear not having enough put by should everything go wrong. But I've felt like this for years. Ten years or more really.

If this is going way beyond normal prudence and if the anxiety you're experiencing around spending is 'crippling' enough that you feel it is getting in the way of you enjoying a normal life, then you could always talk to your GP. It is possible for all kinds of things to become a fixation or obsession and the way you feel could potentially be treated with something like CBT.

You can't take it with you. Just remember that.
I am so insecure about money that no amount of savings would ever be enough.
It took me a long time to learn to spend money, too. I still can't spend it on me easily. Yesterday I bought a pack of hair bands for £4, outrageous. Far cheaper than a haircut, but still feels ugh.
As long as you are on target for only spending what you have, with some buffers built in like 6 months expenses, then you are doing well.