Financial help with funeral costs?

[TooMuchJD]

Does anyone know of any discretionary assistance with funeral costs?

My brother and his wife lost their PFB on Saturday at only 24 hours old following a disastrous (and possibly negligent) labour/intervention. They are now facing going into debt to pay for the funeral of their baby. They both work but are on low incomes, don't get any benefits and have just spent what little savings they had on getting everything for their baby. Understandably they never took out a funeral plan for him.

Really worried for them as the costs of even the most basic funeral are stupidly high and I feel they should not be worrying about bloody money at such a tragic time. The family, friends and his employer are helping as much as we can but it doesn't go far.

They need to go to an independent undertaker (not a chain) as most will do infant funerals free.

(Only charge if you want to go out of area to existing family plot, mileage charged; or if you want a coffin other than the standard white one; pay excess).

I lost my pfb at 4 days old last year. It seems to be an in written rule that they do not charge for their services when it comes to babies. All we had to pay was for actual expenses. Flowers, ad in paper and coffin. They were an independent funeral directors.

Not sure if they are aware of SANDS but they are a charity for still birth and neonatal death. I have found lots of support from them and not sure how I would have coped without it.

Just to update, they didn't have to pay anything for the funeral apart from for flowers (which the family paid for).

The saddest thing I have ever seen is watching the funeral director passing the coffin to my brother to carry in & it was no bigger than a storage box.

Thanks angelopal I have passed SANDS details to them and to my parents who were also struggling to cope. I don't know if they have been in touch with them though. Both my brother & SIL have returned to work this week but it has been a challenge for them. Don't know how you have coped losing you pfb, just watching the grief has been awful.

Glad they didn't have to pay anything. Sounds cliche but it just takes time. I did phased return to work which really helped so if they are finding it difficult they could try that if they have supportive employers.

It's still early days for them but the pain will ease though I don't think it will ever go away. With sands they have online support forums which I use rather than speaking to people in RL. It really helped me knowing that I was not alone. There are aunties and grandparents on it to as the death of a baby affects the whole family so you may find it would help you to.

Take care.