If he wanted to, could he get custody ??

[nutcracker]

I don't know why but I have a nagging feeling at the back of my head that Xp may try to get custody of the kids. He hasn't said anything to this effect but at the mo he is living with his sister and BIL and last year his sister and bil divorced and his bil went for and got custody of the kids. They are now back together but I am a bit worried that they may encourage Xp to try and get the kids off me.

If he wanted to, how much chance would he stand ??

Very little. You have been their primary carer since they were born. You are still in a position to do this and he would have to show that you are a very bad mother in order to have any chance at all. Don't look at his sister and BIL. Their situation might have been completely different.

His whole family are very twisted and I cna just imagine them telling him, how easy it would be to get housed if he had the kids and how he wouldn't have to go to work etc.

Sweet FA chance Nutty is the honest answer, I know great fathers with great jobs and great houses and everything who try fail - one man whose exp is a drug addict - he still did not get custody. Infact he is lucky if he sees his dd once a year.

Thats ok then, just needed my mind putting at rest really, so thanks for that.

nutcracker weren't your children born prior to parental rights being automatic

Point is he would have to apply for legal aid, wouldn't he? If he applies and he really has very little chance of success, the chances are his application would be turned down. Any solicitor worth his/her salt would point out right from the outset that he has zero chance and that it would be an abuse of the court process to submit an application he has no chance of winning. Mind you, there are some unscrupulous solicitors out there would run it just because they could.

How old are the children? Does he have PR? If not, he would have to apply for that first, unless you sign an agreement. So you would get plenty of warning that he was up to something.

The kids were born in 1997, 1999 and 2002, and he is named on all birth certificates. Does that mean he has PR ?

No. The rule is that they have to be born after December 2003 and have his name on the birth certificate. If they were born prior to that date, then his name on the certificate doesn't give him automatic pr.

my x tried to get custody of our kids. who gets custody is nothing to do with gender. it is all down to who is the primary carer and who is able to best care for the kids.if you have always looked after them then he would have to come up with not only a reason why you are unfit to do so, but also explain why he thought it was ok for you to be the primary carer all this time. do you work? does he? i was told that if i worked full time and xp didnt it could go against me because he was available to look after them. it is a very long, drawn out process and unless you get legal aid (not very easy) it is very expensive. if he did go for custody he would not get to take them home then and there, they would stay in their home until reports were done etc etc which would take months. courts do not like disrupting childrens lives any more than is necessary so they wouldnt just hand them over to him without excellent reasons - and if he didnt have a home already that wouldnt make him look too good. 'i want my kids so i can get a council house' isnt really a reason for the courts to hand them over to him. please dont worry

Oh thats good then Freckle.

I know I am probably worrying over nothing, but I was a child in a huge custody battle once (although I actually wanted my dad to win) and i'd hate for the kids to have to go through that.