DH & I have been together over 11 years but it's only in the last 2-3 years that we have been financially linked as we each owned separate houses.
This seemed to work fine but 2 years ago we moved areas and jointly bought a house so that he could be closer to his daughter (previous relationship) and his work. Since then DH & I argue over finances all the time, we now have a very large mortgage and we need significantly more than we thought to finish off the house (we bought a money pit!)
The differences in approaches to finances is now really apparent and it's driving a major wedge between us and I really regret being financially linked to DH as we have such different views. DH's father lost their family home when DH was growing up as he over extended himself and DH's brother has been recently homeless as he lost a job and couldn't afford the rent as he didn't have savings. This seems 'normal' to DH and whilst he wouldn't want it to happen to us he doesn't seem to realise that you need to plan for situations (so that it's unlikely to happen to you).
I think we need to discuss the situation with someone external - as DH doesn't listen to my view or research (i.e he doesn't agree that there is a income to mortgage ratio that is usually advised, he doesn't agree with budgeting for interest rate rises).
Is there anyone who could help ? I wondered about a IFA but we're not really looking for pensions etc so would they be interested in giving us a sensible approach to budgeting?