Shared residence anyone?

[Rach69]

Does anyone share residence of their kids with an ex? I have 3 with my ex-d. When we divorced we agreed 'amicably' (but no court order) to share residence ie have them half each. As we (then) earned a similar amount we agreed to share costs too. Now I have a new baby and a new partner and ex is being an arse. Sometimes he only has them 8pm to 8am (ie when they are asleep) and when I complain he says he wants half my child benefit and half the tax credit (which is now nothing due to overpayment). I have now contacted the CSA to try and get him to pay something/anything formally and regualarly.

By the way I have them every night after school (even when I'm working) and feed them every night. I pay for everything and he pays what and when he feels like.

Think you are right to sort money through CSA if he is messing you around, but as for joint residency IMO doesn't work, too confusing for the children.

i dont understand how that is shared residency tbh. if you want to do shared, 3/4 days per week alternating is probably the best way to stop them getting confused. i dont see the point in him just having them at night, he would be better off having proper contact time. unless he is going to share the awake hours i have no idea why he thinks he is entitled to half the money you get to look after them , as you seem to be the one doing all the actual childcare. speak to a solicitor, many of them do a free or fixed rate 1st appointment. if he is being like this it might be worth getting a court order - that doesnt mean you have to fall out, just that the arrangement is formalised. you can always speak to your ex about getting it formalized and see how he feels. but tbh it sounds like you have custody and he is just making the situation confusing.