They are being mean to me on MSE...

[Mrsbigroundbottom]

Goodness, I went on MSE to ask about a debt issue and they have literally lynched me! Apparently I am a scatterbrain who can't organise their life and is clearly mental with no concept of the real world.. I even got a "facepalmtothenthdegree"

This is because I asked for a suggestion of a consolidation loan when my credit isn't great. I want to consolidate my debts so that I can leave my incredibly stressful job which has very very nearly given me a breakdown in recent months and spend 6 weeks over the summer with my 5 year old DD who I put with a childminder at 12 weeks out of necessity to work full time and have never had any real time off with. I will then work as a childminder.

My outgoings are minimal so I won't have to earn a lot to keep up the repayments and I live with my DP who can support me anyway.

It's made me feel utterly shit about something I was super excited about so i've come back home to MN.

Don't venture outside ladies, it's grim out there!

Shame on me for wanting to do something that makes me happy.

AW poor you! They call is a nest if vipers! They should take a look at themselves!

That's what I thought, surely if you're on that forum then you have money worries or you have had money worries.

I astonishes me that people can be that cruel to someone on a forum. But then i guess it's easy to be billy big bollocks from behind a screen.

I'm going to make a realy go of it and go back on there in a few months time with a giant facepalm (boak) of my own. Particularly for those who have been registered on there since the mid noughties and still have debts on their "tickers" in the 30ks

I noticed on MSE they're not keen on consolidation loans, because experience shows that people who consolidate loans, tend to use the extra financial space to accumulate more debts. Their strategy is normally to rebudget, snowball debts (e.g. pay off the ones with the highest interest rates first) and then keep the momentum up on paying until it's all gone.

I've not seen your thread there and how people responded, but I'd imagine the responses are to warn you about the dangers of consolidating debts and to make sure you don't fall in an even deeper trap by allowing yourself to get a new credit card debt.

Ultimately though, it's your own choice and if you feel you will be disciplined enough to pay off the loan and budget wisely to avoid new debts, that's your choice. You don't owe them any explanation.

That said, it's a great website so even if you're not going to take part in the forums, the tips on the rest of the site are really good and will save you tons of money.

There's a nice way to put the point across though.

There are some REALLY weird people on MSE. I like to read for tips, there is some great advice, but I wouldn't post.

I think some of the posters on MSE are likely to be commenters on Daily Mail website too.

There are good tips on the site definitely.

I do understand the advice you mentioned there Ciske. But what they seem to do on there is just keep hammering the same tired old opinions at everyone regardless of what details you have given. For instance, I have a Very.co.uk limit of £1200 and I have never paid a penny interest on that account as i always pay it off and have only ever had £280 maximum owing in any one month.
I have also had no missed payments in 6 years... I also have use of my DP's credit card and in the three years I have had it i have never once used it for anything other than company expenses...

But despite all that they just keep saying "to be honest you sound like you are completley out of touch with reality" "you just want a loan so you can have a holiday"

As i said to them, in a society where Mum's are able to stay ta home with teir chiildren at the expense of the tax payer I was shocked to have so much outrage because i want to take 6 weeks out with my DD - SELF FUNDED!

I think I'm a bit sensitive at the moment. I'm, not sleeping and very stressed at work. I woke up at 3.30am this morning having a panic attack. I just can't wait to be free.

I think there's nothing wrong with leaving a stressful job to become self employed and spending more time with your dd, as long as you can afford to do so :) have you started the registration process to become a childminder? I read something the other day where the poster said it had taken over a year to get registered due to course dates and delays with inspections

consolidation loans are generally seen as a bad thing as experience shows people tend to take them out then spend back up to the max on the cards and end up in an even worse situation, with the loan as well which is often secured on the house :(

Thanks Bumpybecky, I've secured a loan with my bank now - just wish I'd gone there in the first place! I've updated my thread on MSE and they are all finding it hilarious and saying i must be lying.. what a cruel bunch of tosspots

I have friends who have taken a year to register too, but it seems there are always factors like waiting until all courses are completed before filling in forms etc and not chasing up on things.I reckon I'll be okay to work in September.

I think it's a good thing that I'm doing too. When I'm a wrinkly old lady am I going to look back and wish I'd paid my debts of 2 years earlier? Or be pleased that I listened to what my heart told me and spent time with my daughter and saved myself from emotional and physical burn out?

If they say anything else mean to you darling, you just kick them in the shins ok?

Face palm to the tenth degree?? Honestly.....

I think that's the problem natashabee, I read some other threads where people were in far worse trouble and who were far less organised than me and everyone was really sympathetic. My problem was just laughable apparently... Well, I don't know why I let it get to me now really

I KNOW lollipoppet - who says "facepalm" anyway... yuk.

It'll be half-term somewhere....

Ha ha, true.

Erm, I do think it's bad form to slag off one website onto another. There are plenty of threads on Mumsnet like this. One recently were a mother wanted tips for her nearly 6yo who can't sleep on her own and some mumsnetters were very very cruel in their postings, calling the child a "spolit brat".

I could equally go over to MSE and moan about the posters on Mumsnet. But one thread does not fully represent one site.

I'm sorry you had such a bad time on MSE. I think the danger is that if you post from an emotional angle you get short shrift because they are very factual and can be quite blunt when it comes to giving financial advice. Whereas on here, you can talk about feelings and get some sympathy. I've been on their talk boards too and also had a rough ride, but I've also got some great advice and I've learnt quite a bit, so it's a very useful resource.