What % of the sale of your home did you get when you were divorced?

[walkinginawinterBundleland]

a friend of ours is being told by his wife's solicitor that she wants 90% of the dosh..surely that can't be right?

my friends ex wife wants 100%,and is expecting to get it!

our friend has 3 kids and I can't imagine how he's expected to find a home for himself and them to visit for 10% of the proceeds..especially as his job has now moved him to another much more expensive area.

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I think there's v little in terms of other capital available, though the wife's father did put a little extra cash into the deposit when they bought (but only about £20k, out of a say £290,000 house)

Hmmm, but then doesn't your friend's ex have to house his 3 kids?

I'm not going to get involved in the actual negotiations, just wanted to get a sounding on how people manage these things. And only last week the figure 80% was mentioned, so I was really shocked by 90%. I know the wife is reluctant to give up her lifestyle and home but how are fathers meant to manage? He'll obviously be supporting them financially at the same time as buying a place to live in, so the amount he comes away with really matters.

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yes, they both need a home with enough room for 3 kids. and I imagine because he's a v hands on father (and has a fairly flexible job) that he'll want to see them for more than the odd weekend.

that's what I thought essbee. our friend is such a nice person and a lovely dad, I really don't want to see him be ripped off. tbh I think he'd give his marriage another shot if his wife would agree, he's not the one who initiated it.

(their kids are 2 girls and a boy so ideally they'd both need 3 bedrooms)

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But that may just not be possible. Having 2 houses of the same size on the same income/capital as when you were together and only had one rarely works, unless there is a 3rd (or 4th) adult ready toc ocntribute too.

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they live a couple of hours drive away now his job has moved so i suppose more than weekends isn't going to work with school & everything (one of the kids starts next year and the others are at nursery). he tried to stay living near to them but couldn't because of work issues. i think if he lived nearer he'd be very keen to do shared care.

their house at the moment is quite big, he's being v realistic about what he might be able to afford, but doesn't want it to be a bedsit because he literally wouldn't be able to fit them all in they've been to mediation but now things are in hands of solicitors

If he is living a couple of hours away, then I'd be more worried that he isn't being realistic about how little time he is going to end up having them with him. Every other weekend might work, but his children are also going to want to have some local activities and go to parties etc - I would be amazed if the children would be happy all upping and heading 2 hours away every weekend. And yes, midweek is also being optimistic during termtime. If he really wants to be hands-on then he'll need to find another job that is more local I suspect. How old are the children?

2 yr old girls and boy of 5. working locally isn't an option.