we're in so much debt, i dont know what to do

[rayofsunshine]

Well the title says it all.

We have almost exhauted our overdraft, we have a loan coming out in 2 days time, we are on Monday 2 weeks behind in our rent and we owe council tax.

We owe so much money, i feel totally ashamed and embarraseed. We havent got a clue what to do, and we still need to eat.

Ive spent all morning in tears (which i know isnt going to help or the answer). DP and myself have been a off with on another too, the last thing i want is this destroying our relationship.

Milward
Subscriptions are often MUCH cheaper than buying a mag off a stand. And they make great gifts when people ask what you'd like for Xmas. It also makes for an unexpected treat in your mailbox .

As for papers, I used to buy them daily, too, but now just buy on one day a week, when they have the biggest crossword puzzle.

If you have the time, and it doesn't involve a bus etc local libraries have newspapers. They can also cut down on buying books etc for the kids..a huge cost in our house.

sounds like me expat - I get the times on saturday for the crossword & suduko! I should go for a subscription as well - will check this out.

The most expensive subscription I have it for BBC's Good Food - and I use our Tesco vouchers to get it .

Oh and a minor cost I realise for most of us, but pain killers etc that are own brand must by law be made to the same standard as more expensive brand names

Boots own brand ibuprofen is even made in the same factory as Neurofen, is every bit as effective and is a fraction of the cost.

Good point, martian. If you are a Costco member, milward, you can buy BIG bottles of 'Kirkland' - Costco's own brand - painkillers cheap as chips.

Ditto their barrel of washing powder - and the barrel makes a great storage container for kids' stuff afterwards and instant coffee.

Wow.. lots of good advice here, it seems a lot of us have been through this and come out of the other side.... It WILL get easier....
good luck
How old are your children.. are they at school... what about a dinnerlady, TA,

hiya

just wanted to give sympathy really, as good advice all given.

We were here a while back, and we ended up losing our house (we chose to sell it, but if we hadn't we couldn't have got by and would have lost it). Things do change though, and we are a lot better off now (though not this month! DH was underpais, ddebits's went out, bank has billed us £200 in fees- work did pay up but won't discuss refunding costs)

But generally, things are so much easier now. It takes a lot of time and patience, and really does get you down at times, but you can get there.

Good luck!

One of my favourite sites at the moment is money saving expert - heres a link to the forum that is specifically for people in debt LINK have a read through and you'll find so many people in the same situation as you. They say the first step is recognising that you are struggling and getting help so sounds like you're doing the right thing! Good luck

I tend to buy as much as i can "value brands" , have no choice. Just makes me feel like a cheap skate when i see other peoples trolleys loaded with brand named items. Makes me feel embarressed, as they can see i havent got much money!

ahh I used to feel like that.

NOw I stand there and smirk to myself knowing that my family will be getting hot, cooked from fresh, meal each night - for about 1/4 of the price of the cr*p that the people in front of me have bought LOL.

At least its not just me! Just means i have a little extra to put away for holidays, and i actually save a little too!!
It was worse last year as we both went through bankruptcy, the worse thing ive ever done! When i think back to how i was then...i would never wanna go back!!

How do you keep down the cost of buying meat?? bought some braising steak last week for one meal it cost me over £6!!
Tend to keep to chicken and mince dishes as they are quite cheap

as I've discovered in recent months it is perfectly possible to feed your family healthy and balanced diet on very little money - just takes a bit of thinking. I find it altogether more satisfying knowing I've only spent £2-3 per meal (for all 4 of us) than spending £5-6 per meal and having it 'easy' LOL.

And actually this morning in Morrisons I saw a woman with lots of Morrisons "The Best" range, and quite a few Bettabuy stuff too

goldiilocks - how many are you feeding?

£6 seems like an awful lot of money - what did you use the meat for??

Made me feel a bit better,lol!!
I managed to cut my monthly food bill from last years £500, to £250-£300.( which im proud of,lol!!)
When i think we had £600 spare a month before kids and i was working!
Never mind ds starts school next year, so maybe be able to go back to work!

Feeding 5 of us!! Used it for a beef burgionion! ( oo er your getting to know about my diet now lol!)
Just very hard to make meals as dh hates veggies! He will only eat mushrooms!!

tell your DH to sort himself out and start eating the Bl**dy vegetables then !

Trying getting cheaper cuts of meat, have a good look at what's there, you may need to chop it up yourself, but as long as you're not trying to using stewing steak to make stir fry - I've found any cut will do.

LOL, i tried honest i have! He dosent even eat fruit, made him "try " some a few months back...made him choke,lol!!
I shall have a look next week when i do monthly shop,gonna have to have a really "cheap" month, what with xmas pressies to buy etc!!

I bulk buy meat on pay day from the local butchers- a huge bag of pork chops for a tenner, that sort of thing. We feed five, currently on £60 MAX a week (less as month goes on!) and three of us have allergies, so value yoghurts etc no good.

Do manage it tho, just takes more work. Lots of porrridge for breakfast, marmite on toast for snacks, soups etc. And Dh makes a mean chilli!

Hi I just wanted to say i am in a similar position and i have found the National Debtline to be a great help. Thank goodness for all these brilliant mumsnetters you help when i don't know where else to look!!

£6 of braising steak seems a lot. I could make that last for at least 4 meals for our family of 4. My shopping budget (inc. nappies, cleaning stuff, booze etc) is £60 a week and reasonably OK to achieve. QoQ is very impressive though. And when you start spending £40-50 it will seem so luxurious.

I add things like tinned pulses (flageolet beans for example) to meat dishes to bulk out braising steak and the like, actually improves the meal somewhat IMHO.

With dh needing a cooked meal each night at work (no home mades allowed for health and safety so ready meals only, hot in this weather essential!) 2 kids packed lunch, 3 food allergies to cater for and one in nappies our £50 or so budget just about does it, but manages it with healthy food. £60 and Dh and I get a few treats. It's just a case of adapting and getting used i think.