Self employed ex makes child maintenance hard work ! [confused]

[rhiirhii]

Hi all,new to all this..i'd just like to see if anyone has had the same issues with child maintenance from self employed ex's.

My son is 2,me & his father split after 4 years together,he makes life hard not telling me when hes picking his son up & giving me CM as & when it suits him.

I know i havnt got it as bad as some people as he has his son overnight once a week but he always messes around not telling me when hes getting him untill 10 mins before so im forever hanging around waiting for the text,gets quite annoying,he also pays me 50£ a wk CM which i know is good (we agreed on that after doing an online calculation which came bk at 52£ pw) ..

I know he earns 400£ pw after tax as ive been with him long enough & i always sorted the money out & paid the bills,he gets quite aggresive sometimes & messes around with the payments & like above getting his son!i just want a quiet life for my children (my son & my daughter who is from a previous relationship) id never stop him seeing his son i just would like a bit of a routine so i know where i stand!

I have mentioned before getting a legal document to have times & days so we know whats happening & also csa in place so there's no messing around,he then told me if i did hed tell the csa he wasnt earning what he is (him & his boss do alot of "CASH" work which tax doesnt come into it,so it would be quite easy to lie,i just think its unfair he would go down this route as his priority should be his son,i dont want more money or anything like that i just want something in place so there can be no arguments! to be honest i think with him earning 400£ now it would be around 60£ a wk mark but im not fussed about that like i said i just want no annomosity & the best for my kids :) any help anyone has is appriciated! tahnks

Having had experience of the CSA with an ex who is self employed, with his own business, im sorry to say you have no chance.

I never ever got a single penny as they could "never locate his earnings".

Sorry I cant help further than that, but the CSA are beyond useless, I would not rely on them.

Thanks, its silly you would think they should be able to go through the tax rebates & stuff, my ex got a rebate in january & im pretty sure he put down his ACTUAL earnings not the phony amount he told me hed tell them he got, i think i might have to just hope for the best & see if his attitude dies down & he grows up a little! sorry to hear u never got any help from the csa.

i guess i should just be lucky he pays me something ay! thanks for ur help..

£50 a week doesn't sound much to me but then I don't have any experience of this.

I think you need to be much firmer with him about picking up times. Maybe give him a time and if he's not ther just go out? He has to learn that you can't just hang around for him all day.

I have just started doing the if he aint here at that time go out,i have told him again and again that we need to be civil for the kids.

it takes nothing to have a bit of a routine,its like he does it to stop me from being able to plan any part of my day.. he doesnt seem bothered that i aint in when he texts me,its like easy life for him...

some people just wind me up with there selfishness ... ahaa