Slow fetal heartrate and slow fetal growth feeling upset and confused

[reallygrumpy]

I'm something like 7 or 8 weeks pg and had a second dating scan today because the hospital wanted to work out my dates precisely. There hasn't been as much growth as there should have been comparing this week's scan with last week's and the fetal heartrate was slow (it was fine last week). I had some slight bleeding over the weekend too. I've got to go back next week for another scan and I'm finding this so difficult, I'm terrified that I'm either about to have a miscarriage or that the fetus will die and I won't know. I don't know how I'm going to stay sane till next monday, I've been vile to DH and I'm being a crap mother to DD. It's taken 18 months and fertility drugs to get to this point. I'd really welcome any advice. Thanks

hi there
so sorry to hear you're going through this. there isn't anything you can actually do to 'save' the pregnancy, so this is all about getting through each day at the moment. i know from experience how absolutely hideous it is playing this waiting game. all you can do is 'keep going' and try to survive one day at a time, doing whatever it takes to manage: chocolate, DVDs, long baths, music, gentle exercise, retail therapy - anything to get you through. i totally understand what you're going through having been through it four times myself one way or another and you will find lots of support on here. one thing i would say is that you won't find the answer to what will happen with this pregnancy by searching the internet but you will probably find the temptation to do so overwhelming anyway, and if it's a distraction that helps you get through the hours and days, then just do it anyway. i must have wasted hundreds of hours idly googling this and that to try to work out the fate of my various pregnancies by analysing my symptoms and comparing them to other people's stories but each pregnancy is unique and there really is no knowing. all you can do is wait for that wretched scan, but my hunch is that you will know yourself, instinctively, which way this is going, within the next couple of days.

Hi, Sorry you are gloing through this. This is also happening to me at the moment...we will get the final 'answer' on Friday but the dr yesterday said it didn't look good TBH this is what I already know.....

I am also being a crap mother to my 2 kids....DH is being good and is taking care of them a lot... Have you got people to help you out?

Sorry I have nothing more to say....If you need to chat folks are here on the board...

Hi reallygrumpy, sorry to hear this; I'm in the same boat as you.

Was told I'd miscarried 2 weeks ago at 6 weeks (after a scan), so stopped drugs, started drinking again etc. However, my tests stayed positive, and they found a tiny, slow heartbeat yesterday when checking to see if I was going through an ectopic. The foetus only measures 6 weeks at 8.5 weeks, however, so I'm preparing to miscarry. But at the same time, getting my hopes up and starting all the drugs again (aaargh).

Sotough is right; google if you want to, but at the end of the day we can only keep our fingers crossed, and keep taking the vitamins. Personally, I haven't found any good news stories in the same situation as me, so I think I'll stop looking...

ilovespinach, sorry to hear you're going through it too. Think I'm going to be well into loony tunes territory by the time this is over....

Hi, I'm really sorry to hear about what you're going through but thank you for taking the time to post. It's made me feel less alone. I'm staying away from google and the Internet (well except mumsnet) and managed to make it through work ok today although I did have a weep in the ladies at one point. My gut instinct is telling me this pregnancy is going to fail and part of me is hoping it'll be over soon because being in limbo like this is so hard. At least then I can move on and think about trying for a healthy pregnancy. Oh, I did look up miscarriage on the nhs website and discovered that because of my age I have a 25% chance of miscarriage which hasn't helped. Take care