Another MMC, 13+weeks

[avaj]

I can't believe it's happening again. Thought everything was going ok and then suddenly had some light bleeding last week, scan showed that baby has died. It's so bloody unfair! To make things worse I went to hosp yesterday to get the initial tablet for induction, and they have lost my notes! Now I will have to be booked in all over again sometime this week (if they find the notes).
I lost a baby at 17 weeks last summer. Everything seemed fine then too, until some light spotting. I just can't believe I'm going to go through it all again.
I am still feeling really sick, and it's not really sunk in yet.
Just had to post to get it out, I'm just feeling so angry and sad.

[yama]

I'm really sorry Avaj.

[countrybump]

I'm so sorry.

[Lutyens]

Words fail me avaj
I'm really so very sorry for you.

[avaj]

Thanks for your replies.
No they weren't able to tell me anything, just that it was "one of those things", "not your fault", " you will never know why". All totaly unhelpful, but I suppose there is not much else to be said.
They didn't mention any investigations this time or last.
I found it helpful that I was able to see my baby last time, and I will be really angry if I have to wait so long this time that I might not be able to. I don't know how long it takes before things start to change. I know that probably sounds horrible, but I feel that I really need to see this baby too.

[harimo]

I'm sorry.

I hope you are able to see your baby.

[nomorewine]

I am so sorry you are going through this.

[kissmummy]

hi there
so sorry, this is awful. one thing i would say is that i don't think a MC at 17 weeks is necessarily "one of those things." it's quite unusual - much more so than first trimester miscarriage. Now you have had a second later miscarriage (ie early second trimester) please do push for investigations. If you can bear it, i do think it would be worth having tissue testing on your baby (i'm conscious you want to see it and am not sure whether the two things are both possible...but you could ask what the situation would be...) This could give a lot of information, even the cause.
You don't say how old you are - obviously if you are in your 40s then it may indeed be "just one of those things" but if you are in your early/mid 30s it would surely be worth extensive tests now. You should be entitled to full investigations on the NHS after two later miscarriages (the normal protocol is testing after three miscarriages; but i'm pretty sure you can get testing after two if they are a bit later stage.)
once again, so sorry. i've had four MCs and know the utter disbelief you feel as it happens again and again. fortunately mine have all been first trimester.

[avaj]

Thanks everyone, and I am so sorry for all of your sad losses.
Kissmummy - I am 33, so not really an 'older' mum. I am due to go into hosp tomorrow, so I will ask about tissue testing and see what they say. I will have a look at the testing thread too. Thanks.