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Miscarriage/pregnancy loss

Find support and share your experiences on our Miscarriage forum. See also legal rights and support after baby loss.

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Original poster

How much time did you take off work?

17 replies

Pollyanna · 05/02/2010 08:03

Hi, I had a "natural" mc on Sunday night/monday morning. Ended up being rushed into hospital because of the amount of bleeding.

I lost alot of blood and am anaemic now (I refused a transfusion). The dr said I should stay at home for 2 weeks at least, but I really wonder whether I would be better at work with something to keep me busy.

so I was wondering how long others have taken off?

OP posts:

Original poster

Pollyanna · 05/02/2010 11:47

anyone?

OP posts:

cakeywakey · 05/02/2010 11:58

I'm really sorry to hear about your miscarriage - hope you are being well looked after.

I had a medically managed miscarriage after a scan revealed a missed miscarriage. I took one week off work, but didn't have the problems that you've had.

I was ready to go back after one week because I wanted to get back to as normal as possible really - it kept my mind off things, although I would still howl in the evenings. Everyone is different - you have to do what's best for you.

Would you be able to do any work from home at all if you're not up to going into the office? Take care.

skiesareblue · 05/02/2010 12:06

I'm sorry to hear about your mc. I had one last August following a scan.

I had two weeks off, one week following the scan waiting for the miscarriage (when I too had to rush in to hospital due to bleeding) and a second week after it.

Physically, I felt very drained and emotionally, I do not think I could have gone back any sooner. As it was, I still felt rather fragile when I did return.

Original poster

Pollyanna · 05/02/2010 12:13

I want to go back because I think it may be better to be occupied, but I commute to London and worry that it will be too exhausting.

I do feel guilty being at home though when I'm not feeling really ill. Just tired and emotional.

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coucoukitty · 05/02/2010 13:29

Hi Pollyanna

I'm really sorry to hear about your mc.
I just had a 12 week scan this week only to discover that the pregnancy had failed at 9 weeks. I was utterly devastated. This is my 3rd mc and previously I have always let things happen of their own accord which has been fine. (Both times it took about a week to recover) However at 12 weeks I am worried that this will cause more bleeding and pain than before. The doctor has signed me off for 2 weeks and like you, I was wondering if 2 weeks off work is too long and maybe it would be better to get my mind off it (I only called my boss yesterday to let her know). I said I would play it by ear but my gut feeling is it might be better to give myself the time to get over it properly. If you are commuting to London that is harder than a local commute. I have decided to see how I feel after a week but will probably make the most of the time off to heal emotionally. Go easy on yourself and best of luck. Take care

detoxdiva · 05/02/2010 13:47

Sorry to hear about your mc.

I discovered a mmc at my 12 week scan and opted to wait for a natural mc over any intervention.

I actually went into work on the day after my scan because I couldn't bear sitting it out at home and crying. That was the Saturday - I began bleeding on the Monday morning and took the rest of the week off, returning the following Monday.

For me that was long enough - the bleeding and pain was only heavy for the first 2 days - and I found being at home depressing. I needed the week to recover physically, but gained emotional support from work, and needed to have something to 'do' and get up for in the morning.

Take Care

Original poster

Pollyanna · 05/02/2010 13:52

I went into work after my scans too, and was fine (apart from dreading mass bleeding at work).

Sorry about your mc coucoukitty - I was nearly 12 weeks too, and did have horrendous bleeding on Sunday, but it is manageable now. My doctor seemed to think I would need more time off after the 2 weeks are up but I am wondering whether feeling tired at work is easier than at home.

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andagain · 05/02/2010 14:22

Polyanna hi,
I am sorry about your mc.
It might be worth considering giving yourself a bit longer rest than you originally thought.
I went to work I think 6 days after my MC started as it wasn't too bad at all bleeding and pain-wise but then it got much much worse suddenly, ended up in A&E overnight (about ten days into it, the whole thing lasted over four weeks!) as pulse was faint due to sudden and big loss of blood. I found that the bleeding was a bit unpredictable as in it would seem to be diminishing and then it would start full on again. That went on for 3-4 weeks.
And it is exhausting for you so might as well give your body more time to recover. I completely understand you wanting to be occupied with something else and not sit at home and think about it all the time but I would recommend you take time off your doctor suggested.
Take care.

Mummy369 · 06/02/2010 01:32

I would agree with andagain as I had a 2 week sick cert. due to run out yesterday but returned to the GP in the morning as I was dreading going back to work (I work with newborn babies). Lucky I did as I started bleeding heavily again yesterday afternoon! Emotionally, it has sent me straight back to the first couple of days after finding out I had mmc..

jocesar · 06/02/2010 19:02

I run my own business so tried to take as little off as physically possible. So took day of ERPC and next day off. hen back to work. Cannot afford to take time off for emotions unfortunately.

TheFallenMadonna · 06/02/2010 19:07

I worked during a miscarriage (which took about 10 days I think), but took three days off at the end because of the very heavy bleeding. It was stupid. I'm a teacher and it didn't take my mind off things at all. It was horrible.

sunburntats · 06/02/2010 19:11

Hi,
With each of my mc's the time off has varied and that has been for various reasons.

The last one i had 6 weeks off, this was because of heavy bleeding like you, with lots of pain, this meant i was taking strong painkillers which made me dizzy.
Also i was psycologically very very distressed and found myself bursting into tears for no apparent reason at random times.
Felt "ready" after the 6 weeks.

I have had between a weekend, to 5 weeks off.

Thing is, if you are anaemic, you will feel exhausted, and a bit breathless probably, so a short time at work will wipe you out.
You need to build yourself up really.

Original poster

Pollyanna · 06/02/2010 19:28

Thanks all. I cleaned the house this morning (a bit anyway!) and it completely wiped me out, so maybe I'm not ready to go back on Monday.

I have my dd's birthday party tomorrow as well so I'll see how that goes.

I am also worried that I'm due a big bleed - according to my scan on Monday I have alot of womb lining left, but hardly any bleeding, so perhaps I'll be like you andagain.

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Anastasia1979 · 07/02/2010 09:39

Hi, I'm so sorry for your loss...I had a mmc at 12 weeks and took 2 weeks off work, I went back this week thinking I was ready for it, and it's been horrendous. Struggling with tiredness, pregnant collegues, some bleeding plus a really really busy week (they certainly didn't cut me much slack); think I went back too soon really, but felt that I had to return.

I thought it would take my mind off things, but it doesn't really, so you are juggling work and emotions all at the same time.

AND I've become annoyed with myself making other people feel better and 'ok' about my mmc; reassuring them that I'm 'normal' and not about to do anything 'weird' like crying, laughing and joking as if I'm fine.

My advice would be to only go back when you really feel up to it, and don't let anyone else tell you when this is, it's a choice that only you can make as it's so personal. Take all the time you need, nothing is more important than you looking after yourself.

I hope you feel better soon, look after yourself. xxxx

Original poster

Pollyanna · 07/02/2010 09:53

thanks Anastasia, I don't feel up to it so I have decided that I won't go back. I would have a very busy week if I did go back. Sorry about your mc - it's crap isn't it? are you going to go to work this week?

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Anastasia1979 · 07/02/2010 11:44

good for you Pollyanna! I really think I went back too soon so don't make the mistake I did!

...trouble is, now I'm back it's hard to turn round and go sick again. I'm under a bit of pressure workwise as I have to apply for my own job soon, so have to put in a good performance, bla bla bla!

redcatpanda · 17/02/2010 20:33

I do encourage you to take what you feel need. I had a a miscarriage at 12 weeks with my first pregnancy and, as it had been a 'complete evacuation' only took a week off. The truth was I took it really badly, got very depressed and then got an infection and had 2 more weeks off. I didn't want to leave home. I just wanted to look at trees and eat magnums. So I did. My doctor did encourage me to get back into work, for my own good. The life-saver for me was that he wrote a note to my work advising them to allow me to go part time for a limited period. This was brilliant, it gave me head space to process the grief. I was lucky, my employers were very supportive. I recovered really well but I do think it's easy to underestimate what an enourmous physical strain miscarriages are, as well as to deny yourself the right to feel the grief is real

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