Did you do anything to remember your baby by?

[onlygirl]

Iknow this is something you won't ever forget but i don't know what to do. Did you do anything?

I bought a silver ring with a spiral design. The spiral was a symbol of birth, death and re-birth and it felt nice to think of.

When DD1 died we bought a tree and planted it in the garden. We made sure it was a tree that should have beautiful cherry blossom around the time of her death each year.
Unfortunately it had grown too big for us to take with us when we moved, so planted another one in the new garden.
Every year it is a lovely reminder.

DH was also very sweet and commissioned an artist to paint a scene from a dream I repeatedly had of our DD stood in a field of daffodils. It is in our lounge above the fireplace as a daily reminder.

I went on to have 4 MCs, but have never marked these in any way really.
Now have 5 DCs who all know why we have the special tree and the meaning of the painting.

I bought a silver ring that I wear all the time. Also I will give a donation to the miscarriage association.

My friend lost a baby at 11 weeks. She wasn't expecting for a tiny little baby with arms and legs to come out. At first she wasn't sure what to do and almost flushed him away and then at the last minute stopped herself. Her and her DP decided to bury him in a plant pot so they can take him with him wherever they go.

Nothing for me too...had a few before and between pregnancies and although it may sound awfully heartless, I don't even remember the dates anymore. I did a couple of decades ago but the years diminished it.
Very sorry for you...there are happier days around the corner.xx

I'm going through a miscarriage at the moment (at 8 wks) and this thread has been very helpful to me - so thank you for sharing everyone.

I am a positive person and try to find something good to come out of every situation - it's how I cope with life.

On this occasion I have been struggling to find anything positive. After looking at this thread yesterday I decided to donate some money to a children's charity, thank you for the idea.

Hopefully I will have helped to give someone else's baby a chance even though I could do nothing to save my own.

These messages have also been helpful to me too.
I have ended up buying a necklace, the pendant is 2 small gold bars wrapped around a cluster of diamonds. I thought this could either represent me,dh and the baby we lost or my 2 ds's and the baby. I love it and only me and dh know the meaning so it is super special.

TW...so so sorry...I am also a silver lining person and could find no silver lining to my first experience until a few years later on a gynae ward when a patient was so utterly bereft, she wouldn't go down for her D&C. Lots of tears and hugs helped her through it and even as I sit here now, I am a bit choked and we are talking about 20 years ago..but you will be someone else's shoulder one day and you will know just what to do.

I had a mmc, which resulted in having an EPRC on Christmas Eve. We bought swarovski angel wings that we have got hanging up in the lounge, and next Christmas we are going to put them on the tree, so that it is with us at Christmas in some way.
Take lots of time out and be kind to yourself.

I have just had a short service at our local church (just me and DH) where we lit a candle and the vicar said some prayers. It really helped to acknowledge I had been pregnant and remember the baby and move on (a bit like a normal funeral). Have felt a lot better since marking the baby's life since then.

We named a star after our little lost one. For some reason DP just had a really strong feeling that it was a girl- even though we have no concrete evidence for this- so we gave it a girls name that just felt right, and on it's certificate we noted the star's special day was the day we learnt we conceived for the first time.

We were considering the day we miscarried but our little bean gave us so much joy, even though it was for such a short time that we felt we should celebrate that fact