d&c and trying again

[tigger15]

Does anyone know how soon you can try again after a d&c? They managed to discharge me without any info other than saying I should bleed for a few more days. The doctor who diagnosed it 4 weeks ago said that you should wait until you've had a period but then said this was mainly for their dating purposes for the next pregnancy.

Any advice?

Hi tigger15
I am sorry for your loss. I had a miscarriage at 17 weeks last year. We waited until I had finished bleeding before trying again, but didn't wait until the first period.
There is no medical reason why you can't try straight away, provided you have finished bleeding (there is a risk of infection if you're still bleeding). Some people prefer to wait a bit to recover from the miscarriage, but it's a personal choice.
The chances of conceiving again before the first period are quite low to be honest, as most women don't start ovulating again straight away.
The following website has a lot of information on miscarriage and trying again: www.pregnancyloss.info/
I found it useful. Good luck! xx

Hi - sorry you've been through this. I think the only real reason you're supposed to wait until after your next period is for dating.
I'll just let you know what happened to us.

We thought we'd just see what happened - we were on holiday 3 weeks after the ERPC. A few weeks later when I felt a bit queasy I did a PG and got a strong positive. My friend who had been through the same as me (except a natural MC for her) had conceived straight away and so we were convinced it must be true. I started bleeding a week after the test and so assumed I was miscarrying again. However, a scan showed an abnormal area and they said it could be a partial molar preg or retained tissue. Fortunately, it turned out to be retained tissue (my HCG levels were dropping)rather than a molar pregnancy.

I had just assumed that as I stopped bleeding about 10 days after my ERPC that that was that - all gone. I thought an ERPC was more likely to clear things up quickly compared to a natural miscarriage so didn't do a PG test to check it was negative.

I've learnt a valuable lesson. Still waiting for the bleeding to finish now and will then do a PG test before thinking about trying again. I'm too impatient to wait for a period though ( and have had enough of sanitary towels for a while so am hoping I may not need any for 9 mths or so...). Trying to be optimistic. HTH - good luck

I'm sorry for the loss of your baby.

While for many people there is no medical reason to wait for your AF before trying again, I personally think it is worth thinking about delaying until after your first AF,

At the very least, I would suggest making sure that you don't start trying again until you are absolutely sure that you have physically healed. I've had 4 mc and developed infections after two of them (one followed an ERPC). These had to be treated with strong antibiotics and this would have been even more stressful if there had been a possibility that I was pregnant as some antibiotics can be damaging to developing fetuses.

I would also strongly recommend that you do not start trying again until you have got a negative on a pregnancy test. This ensure that you don't have to deal with the horrible situation described by dcb when you think you are pregnant, but in fact the test is just reacting to HCG left over from the pregnancy that has just ended. The length of time this takes depends on how far along you were when your pregnancy ended. If you lost your baby at 6 / 7 weeks, it might only take a few days. HOwever, if your pregnancy stopped at 12 weeks it could take 30 - 35 days (or maybe more) to get back to zero.

Incidentally, it may be helpful to know that ovulation predictor kits are not reliable if you still have HCG in your system. They will come up as positive.

Good luck with your next pregnancy. If this is your first miscarriage, the chances of things being OK with your next pregnancy are still excellent.

Thanks for all the advice. Yes it is my first one. I thought I was 10-11 weeks but had bleeding so they did a scan and informed me that the baby had never developed past 5-6 weeks. When they checked me again 3 weeks later most of the sac was still in there so they scheduled me for an ERPC.

I was planning on waiting until all bleeding had stopped and I felt ok and then another week on top of that and I'll now add a pregnancy test to that list too. It's just the bleeding started over a month ago and to have to wait another 4-6 weeks for AF to arrive on top of that just seems unbearably long.

Does the feeling get better? I thought I had worked it all out over the initial period but having the ERPC seems to have turned me into an emotional wreck again.

Dear tigger15
It does get better, but it takes time. I was very angry and depressed after my mc, eventually had counselling (cognitive behavioural therapy) which really helped. You've lost your son or daughter, it is a bereavement, and you will need time to grieve. It helped me to create a "memory box" of mementoes of the baby, scans, cards that people sent, etc. I also gave him a name.
I got pregnant again 3 months after the mc, and was actually glad I had not got pregnant straight away - 2 pregnancies back to back would have been very hard physically and emotionally. We now have a beautiful 3-month old son. Your chances of conceiving again and having a successful pregnancy are very high, so take heart. The Miscarriage Association publishes leaflets you might find useful, can also put you in touch with volunteers who've experienced the same thing. Take care. xx

As Mouette said, yes, it does get better, but it may take longer than you think. After each of mine, it's taken a good two or three months of feeling pretty terrible before I began to feel better. I think early on it can seem OK because you can be in in the "shock" stage and later on it can become more difficult. (Of course, some people feel OK much more quickly than this, and that is completely normal and OK too.)

I'm very sorry for your losses, neolara. Did they ever find what went wrong? It took us a long time to get an answer - only got it after I got pregnant again, and only because we saw a specialist privately. I hope things are better for you now. xx

Thanks Mouette. Things are fine now. I'm 32 weeks pregnant and although the first 20 weeks or so were pretty stressful, I'm now feeling much more relaxed. I've been very lucky that although I've miscarried often, we seem to get pregnant very quickly and easily and I already have two dcs. However, if this pregnancy had gone wrong, I think I would have found it very difficult to try again.

No reasons were found for my mc, but my SIL has also had 4 mc, so I think there probably is some kind of genetic factor playing a part. I think doctors only have a very limited understanding at the mo of what causes mc. In 30 years, they may have an answer for me, but not one now.

Congratulations on the birth of your son. I'm glad you got some answers as to what went wrong previously. While losing a baby in the first trimester is hard, I think losing one later must be completely devastating and much more difficult to cope with.

Hi Neolara
So glad to hear the pregnancy is going well. I think mc is always hard, but yes, the later it is the worse it gets - we thought we'd be all right after 12 weeks. I have a weak cervix, which is why I lost the first baby. I had an operation when I got pregnant again and managed to keep my ds, but the pregnancy was tough - got pre eclampsia at 32 weeks, had to be induced at 37, ended with an emergency c section. But it was all worth it! I wish you all the best for the future.