Just need to off load

[flossie75]

I started spotting nearly 3 weeks ago (7wks) and had a mc confirmed just over a week ago.

I was doing really well - each day feeling stronger and managing to distract myself pretty well. My husband's been great - devastated himself but we're looking after each other.

Went back to work this week, but am not coping very well with that. It's that time of year - I'm a manager and I've got to do everyones objectives for the next year. A few weeks ago I wasn't going to still be at work in 2010 but it's really hit home that everythings changed now.

The baby I thought I was going to have and the life that came with it isn't going to be when I thought. It just seems that everytime I come across something that's changed I dissolve into tears. Working from home today so I don't have to face everyone but I've got to get back in at some point.

This is my first pg, in the first month of trying so I'm getting all the 'atleast you know you can', 'next time it'll be fine' etc which I know are true but I'm terrified of trying again and dealing with this again.

Sorry for the rant - feeling better for just getting words down.
Reading the other threads from you all helps as well - my heart goes out to you - it's good to know I'm not alone.

I am sorry for your loss

Be kind to yourself and your husband

flossie you could be me..i had a mmc in sept, fell the first month of trying....it takes time to feel yourself after this happens, 7 months on and i still get bad days, the good news is i get more good days now.
Pop over the emmsys angels thread no 4 everyone over there is feeling the same.
Good luck and remember time does heal x

Flossie - i know how you feel

Is my first day back in work since my MC on Easter Sunday - although spotting started 2 weeks ago today - and I knew I was going to MC from then (and scan just after then).

Am finding today so very very hard - while have been ok during holiday... just sitting in my office alone feeling tearful.

Was my first time of being PG too. I just want to go home and cry.

I have up and down days at the mo - I guess the same may be true for you. So sorry for your loss
xx

I'm so sorry to hear about your loss flossie

Good to hear that you and your husband are looking after each other, this is the most important thing you can do right now.

It is only natural to be feeling the way that you do, the hopes and dreams you carried feel like they have been snatched away from you and you wonder if they will ever be yours again? That's how I feel anyway.

You just have to be very kind to yourself and let yourself grieve...do not worry for a moment what others may think.

Cry, eat chocolate, cry some more, dance a little, rant on Mumsnet!!

However you feel please know that you are not alone.