Lost my baby girl 16+5 weeks

[Boymum2256]

So I’ve had a very traumatic few days I just wanted to share my experience.

Wednesday I was fine all day until about 4pm when I started getting very mild contractions (at first I thought I need a poo) but they were coming and going, this was only for about 20 minutes. So I took myself upstairs to lie down for a bit but as I’ve lied on the bed my waters broke which was obviously a shock to me because I did not expect that at all.

I’ve gone to a&e they sent me up to gynaecology I passed baby girl in one of the paper toilet bowls but also lost a lot of blood at this time, my placenta wouldn’t come out so they tried to take it out with a speculum and tools but it was so so painful so I was took for emergency surgery to remove it and lost a lot more blood while I was there. After surgery I woke up with the tube still down my throat which was just so horrible.

I lost 3.5 litres of blood all together and I’m now on my 3rd blood transfusion.

I’ve seen and held baby girl and she’s just so beautiful and peaceful🩷 the emotions haven’t hit me yet but I think they will over the next few weeks and I’m not sure how I’m going to cope.

I’m so very sorry for your loss and wish you peace ❤️

I'm so sorry for your loss.

Be gentle with yourself. You honestly sound like you are still in shock. I hope you have lots of support around you.

I am so sorry for the loss of your beautiful little girl, my heart absolutely goes out to you. I am also so sorry for the additional medical trauma you have suffered, the loss itself is traumatic enough without everything else you have been through. We lost our little boy at almost 21 weeks 6 weeks ago. It has felt impossible at times but we’re getting through somehow. Having a funeral helped me to process what had happened a bit more so if that’s an option for you I would really recommend it. I still feel completely numb at times though. Here if you want to chat but absolutely fine if you don’t. Sending you love and solidarity. Be kind to yourself.

Have you chosen a name for your beautiful girl?

So very sorry for the loss of your precious daughter. Take gentle care of yourself ❤️

😢
I'm so sorry OP. That sounds heartbreaking and I'm so sorry you had to go through it. Thinking of you and your beautiful girl x

Yes we named her honey, and the weird thing is I’ve been the word honey about 10 times since I had her 🩷

So sorry for your loss. I lost a baby boy at 16 weeks and it was very difficult. Thinking of you xx

I’m so sorry for your loss. ❤️💐💔

Similar to me 😔I’m so sorry for your loss.

My timeline of what happened

20th December - Woke up at 8am with really bad back pain and stomach pain had a bath and didn't change it so l tried painkillers didn't help, 8-9pm that evening | ended up ringing maternity ward as they was coming and going in waves every 2 minutes lasting about 20-30 seconds they asked me to go to gynaecology ward so I made my way there. They scanned me & examined me and my cervix was closed and baby was happy. So sent me home with co codomol.

21st December - woke up 8-9am and was in agony still but more intense, I wiped and saw pink blood I then started bleeding heavy red blood, little clots at first so I rang gynaecology and they told me to come in and I went to do a urine sample and it was just a massive string of red clot and my urine sample was completely red. They put me on gas and air straight away because they could see I was struggling doctor came and done a examination and my waters broke and I was dilated but unsure how many
cm the bleeding then got a lot worse and a few hours later I gave birth to my baby boy at 16+6. Which then I ended up with an infection and had to stay in till Xmas eve on IV antibiotics and fluids I also lost 1.2litre of blood.

i will never be the same I am completely heart shattered idk if it’ll get easier to live with for me but to have my sons ashes in our home instead of him coming home will forever haunt me, he was so perfect and I think why the fuck does this happen to us to our precious perfect baby’s. Once again I’m so so sorry for the loss of your beautiful girl & if you need a chat I am here 🪽❤️

I also had to go to theatre to have the placenta removed , and I was upset in hospital but I was a lot worse after I left the hospital without my son, I think I was so traumatised and drained from it all I was there 21st-24th and I think that’s when it felt real to me. If you can take all the support or someone to lean on you can, I’d be lost without my partner honestly he’s been my rock, take care of yourself hun🤍

I’m so sorry for your losses @Boymum2256 and @lineeyesqueen212. I lost my baby at 20 weeks and i know just how heartbreaking and traumatic it is. You’re not alone. I’m 3 months post loss and i know it’s very hard to even imagine, but it does get easier to function. Life is back to normal in terms of doing things you’re expected to, but of course the pain is still there. From speaking to others who have been through this, they say it gets better, so i hold on to that.

My one recommendation is to join support groups like SANDs. They have helped me so much. Please feel free to PM me.