Missed Miscarriage Grief

[Orchidqueen05]

I’ve never posted on here before but I just feel so lost and overwhelmed and don’t really know where to turn.
DH and I found out last week at our 12 week scan that our baby had no heartbeat. They estimated baby died at about 9 weeks. I had no bleeding or pain and it was such an awful shock as naively I’d never heard of a MMC before. I had surgery under general which appears to have gone ok.
We are incredibly lucky to have a beautiful DS who is nearly 3. My pregnancy with him was straightforward. I just feel like such a failure and that I’ve let my DS down that I haven’t been able to give him a sibling. It took us 10 months to conceive this baby. I feel guilty for feeling this sad when I am so blessed with our DS already.
Not sure what I am asking for really but any positive stories after MMC would help.

I’m so sorry this happened to you. I experienced a MMC and it’s a horrible shock (I didn’t know about MMCs either). It’s early days and you’re probably still recovering from having a general anaesthetic too. Please know you haven’t let anyone down, and it’s completely understandable to grieve the future you imagined. Treat yourself with kindness and let others support you. I eventually went on to have two babies (in my early 40s).

Hello, I had a MMC many years ago, also picked up at twelve week scan. I felt very sad and strangely embarrassed (about the MMC and the sadness). I've had successful pregnancies since- sometimes taking a while to get pregnant, sometimes not. MMC is a hormonal whirligig and such a disappointment- take care 🌺

I had a Mmc and then an early miss as 6 weeks and then a beautiful little girl. Keep trying xxx

I've been trying to give my daughter a sibling for two years now and have had two miscarriages, one at eight weeks and one at fifteen. I know exactly what you mean about letting out children down by not giving them a sibling. I feel so guilty and ashamed about what happened. Please be kind to yourself and know that despite what our emotions tell us it wasn't your fault.

I am so sorry for your loss. I had a mmc for my second pregnancy and it’s such a shock after what was an easy first pregnancy. I was in disbelief for so long as there were no symptoms. It’s such a cruel thing.

i don’t conceive easily: we did go on to have a second baby who is now a very lively 4 year old! I
memtioned to my gynae that I struggle to conceive and she prescribed letrozole which did help: it boost ovulation

I am so sorry for your loss @Orchidqueen05

After my first baby I had two MMCs which took me totally by surprise. I am currently feeding toast to my nine month old rainbow baby. The conception threads on here have lots of support for TTC after loss which were a great support for me. Feel free to DM me if you want to talk, and be kind to yourself x