Currently going through my sixth miscarriage at 42 - where do I go from here?

[TammyinCork]

Trigger warning: Current miscarriage, previous losses, living child

Two days ago, we received the news at our ten-week scan that baby's heartbeat had stopped, and there was no development after seven weeks. Absolutely devastated... This is our sixth first-trimester loss (we also have a five-year-old son). I was on progesterone twice a day, low-dose aspirin, 5mg folic acid and Proceive Omega 3 and pregnancy multivitamins from positive test onwards, and was eating a very healthy diet throughout. I have never smoked or vaped and don't drink alcohol.

After the last loss 18 months ago (which I was also on aspirin and progesterone for), both myself and my husband had gone for testing at the Cork Pregnancy Loss Clinic, and all results came back normal. They just said it could be my age and egg quality (I was 40 back then and recently turned 42), and can do no more for us.

I now want to book an appointment with Dr Shehata in Epsom (I am originally from London but moved to Cork nearly four years ago, and services are a lot more limited here).

Has anyone managed to have a successful pregnancy after this many losses, and what did you do differently?

Am new here so not too sure how it works and don’t want to offend but it makes me a little sad the people saying to give up. It’s really not as simple as that when you want something so badly it hurts. I’ve also been told by more than one consultant that 42 is fine as long as you’re still ovulating. Yes the qualify won’t be as good as you were younger but it can absolutely happen and does for many many people. If it was just as easy as “giving up” I wouldn’t be putting myself through this heartache of alll the losses but it’s really not that easy x

@SaturdayDream @ScratCat I have a friend who was in a similar position to me. She is a year older and based in Atlanta, Georgia. At 42 she had her third child after five miscarriages, including two second-trimester ones. She and her husband had extensive tests which all came back clear.

Also, if it is about egg quality (for me), why did I have my first miscarriage at 34, an age where most women should still be able to have a successful pregnancy? All things I wonder about.

I was going to suggest high NK cells too. This was my issue, I had multiple losses, the first at nearly 20 weeks then each time earlier and earlier until I was just having chemical pregnancies.

I saw Dr Alison Taylor at The Lister as she specialises in older women. I was 39 by then. She thought given that I was able to conceive easily, that didn't really indicate egg quality as the issue and it was more likely a "hostile environment". The NK test was the only one that confirmed anything as wrong. I also had a short luteal phase but that is treatable with progesterone supplements. The theory is that the NK cells see the embryo as an invader and attack it. With each pregnancy the cells ramp up some more.

I was due to have ivf with a blood plasma transfusion at the time of implantation (and another 1-2 transfusions after I'd a pregnancy was confirmed). However I had a surprise positive and had my first plasma transfusion at 5-6 weeks pregnant.

It worked. "Embryo" is now 11 years old and she is doing great. (Like you I also have an older child, now 20.)

Good luck.

Well said, and it's good to hear that consultants look at the bottom line: whether you can still get pregnant...

Hi Honeylulu, thank you for sharing your story: it gives me a lot of hope! Really glad you were able to have your second child through the NK cells treatment. It is great to hear there are doctors who specialise in treating older women! I suspect NK cells will be my issue too, as I have several autoimmune issues, like nut allergies, mild eczema, hayfever.

Did you have any side effects from the treatment, long term or short term?

No, no side effects at all. In fact unless I'm discussing the secondary infertility journey with anyone I could forget I ever had it! To be honest I had sort of forgotten it by the time I gave birth.

The only different thing is that I'm no longer allowed to donate blood but that's not exactly life changing for me.

So glad to hear this, and that she is doing so well!

Sorry I think he is mainly in Clane in Kildare but he does online consults for first steps fertility in bray. I would do a consult with him before failing pregnant so you have a plan in place. No I had no side effects apart from sleep bit off with steroids but just take them early in am and that helps with it

Thanks - that is good advice re: taking them in the morning. Incidentally, my husband's uncle lives quite close to there.

Tammy I am so sorry to hear this news, I share your pain as also lost my much wanted 2nd baby on 04/07 ☹️ we’d seen a heartbeat at 5 weeks and was hopeful for a healthy update. Was on all the meds… plenty of progesterone too and have a lovely 5.5 year old son who is incredible yet my nurture / family growth feelings just won’t subside 💔 I’ve had all the tests and failed x2 rounds of IVF and x2 rounds of ovulation induction before that, this is my 4th miscarriage, it sucks!

my reccomendation is acupuncture and reflexology, I’ve been doing that since March and we fell pregnant in May first time in 2 years ( last two years have been all the assisted fertility attempts) we had our son naturally and I still believed we could conceive again, it worked. It’s just keeping the pregnancy which is so hard for my body. Dunno if this helps you but I just want to share I understand and have hope for you too.

That is awful news - I am really sorry. I hope you are blessed with your rainbow baby... I have heard a good bit about acupuncture and reflexology... I don't like needles and try to avoid them as much as possible😆Thank you so much for your kind wishes.

Just been told that my cytogenetic testing came back with nothing i.e. nothing could be found from the sample... Feeling quite down about this.

Have any if you heard of prednisone? My consultant has said she will prescribe me that and some blood thinning injections if I’m lucky enough to get another BFP x

I had three miscarriages between 38 and 40. Then I had some investigations and was told to start taking prescription strength folic acid and baby aspirin. Then as soon as I realised I was pregnant a fourth time, I had progesterone tablets vaginally to 12 weeks. All that worked, and at almost 42 I had my precious child.

Hello, I was taking all of those for my last two losses. All the progesterone seems to do is stop me from bleeding - this last miscarriage is taking longer than usual because of it, I'm sure.

I am glad to hear they worked for you, though - congratulations on your second child!

Yes, I suspect this is what I will be prescribed if I do indeed have high or elevated NK cells... I know I cannot take intralipids due to my peanut and soya allergies!

Thank you. What about the prescription folic acid? Is that worth a try for you?

I was on 5mg folic acid a day. None of it worked 🙁

I had my seventh and final miscarriage at 42 (DD was 3). I just couldn’t put my body or both mine and DH’s emotions through all that again - although all mine were early MCs the last two (after DD was born) resulted in hospitalisation.

It’s a hard decision to make, OP.

I had 8 pregnancy “fails” : one ectopic , multiple early miscarriages, one at 24 weeks. No reasons found. I had given up. Then I got pregnant again , by mistake, at age 45, with only one ovary intact. Shortly after that I was told I was being made redundant from highly stressful job. I had a totally straightforward pregnancy with zero problems for me or baby. He’s now a 6’2” and 16. I am convinced that my body allowed me a successful pregnancy when it knew I would be leaving the job behind. Everyone’s story is different but I think stress is perhaps a bigger factor than is recognised.

Ah ok. I’ve not been tested I’ve just been prescribed them. That and blood thinning injections. They’re throwing the kitchen sink at me for the last shot!

That’s great, I’m glad it all worked for you. Sadly I was on all those when I had my last miscarriage ☹️

Very sorry to hear of your losses - that sounds dreadful, especially as the last two ended in hospitalisation. Yes, it is such a personal decision to make, and dependent on so many factors. I figure that I haven't had proper assessment and treatment yet, which is why I am giving it a last roll of the dice with the new appointment...

I work full-time in quite an intense job, so I wonder if that is a factor. That said, it has been useful to go back to work a week or so after each loss, both to keep my mind occupied / not thinking about all this too much and for social reasons (I am an expat in Ireland and most of my friends still live in the UK, as well as my parents). Glad you had success eventually!

Fingers and everything crossed for you!