*TW* returning to work after miscarriage.

[RachelJay16]

Hi All,

Just looking for some advice really/experiences anyone else may of faced returning back to work after a pregnancy loss/miscarriage.

Unfortunately I suffered from a miscarriage in December. Luckily I work for a company where they allow you 2 weeks off for any pregnancy loss/miscarriage even if this is before the 24 weeks (and rightly so any loss is a loss and devastating).

However, during my time off and my return to work my manager hasn’t even done a return to work, asked how I am or done anything the policy says should be done on a return to work and on my first day back just asked me if certain tasks had been done before my ‘time off’.They hadn’t even told the HR department I had been off as there was nothing recorded in my absence calendar etc. My manager is a female and actually feel like the males in my work place have been more concerned how I am/if I was ok to be back at work.

I was looking forward to getting back to work for some ‘normality’ however, I just feel since I been back it’s actually making me feel worse and my manager is making it feel awkward/feel like there is an atmosphere… she’s stopped talking to me and including me in on conversations. So bizarre.

I’ve raised it with her manager over a week ago and he was really apologetic and said he would speak to her but still nothing?

I was just wondering if anyone else has had any other experience like this/what did you do in this situation?!

I know I shouldn’t let it bother me but I honestly can’t help it. I’m ttc again now and can’t bare the thought of having another miscarriage especially with how unsupportive my work have been through a loss.

My manager has been appalling about my loss and leave. I took 2 weeks sick leave, she sent a somewhat annoyed WhatsApp to me the day I went on leave saying I needed to tell everyone and hand over all the things I needed doing. Then nothing, no communication or anything. Came back to work this week Monday and didn't get a message or anything, in fact she even cancelled my 121 just removing it from the calendar not even sending the automated message to say it was cancelled. When I messaged her to double check it it was cancelled she didn't even reply. I've not spoken to her since I came back. She's a horrific manager and I'm speaking with a senior leader and HR about her behaviour (around this and other things) next week.

Wow. I’m so sorry you are going through something similar to me. Seriously, what is wrong with these people who are meant to be managers? It’s fair enough being well at your job but if you can’t support your team or even acknowledge how they are in personal life then I don’t think you should be a manager IMO.

I’m getting more and more frustrated everyday and tempted to go down the HR route as well.