Boss told colleagues about my MMC

[WishingUponARainbow]

I found out I had a MMC on Monday and have just found out that my boss has gone into work and told my colleagues what has happened and why I'm not there.
They knew I was TTC but they didn't know about my pregnancy.

I understand she may have thought she was making things better and easier for me but I am absolutely livid that she has barely reached out to me this week and hasn't even had the decency to message me first to check that I'd be happy for people to know.

Am I being dramatic or are my hormones just all over the place/in the anger stage of grieving?

I'm so so sorry for your loss, OP. I think your feelings are completely valid, it's an incredibly intrusive thing to relay this news without speaking to you first or checking in to see how you're doing. I hope that their heart was in the right place and they were doing it to avoid people asking you questions that you might not want to answer, but nevertheless I think you're completely justified in feeling upset.

As it's now happened, the only thing you can really do is now control the narrative, I personally would speak to my manager and be honest that you would've really appreciated some say in if and how this message was delivered, and advise your manager on how you would like the team to handle this upon your return, i.e if you'd not like it to be addressed until you're ready or if you're ready to allow people to express their condolences. Make your manager accountable for communicating this with your team, because you certainly shouldn't have to given the fact that you didn't make the decision to share the news.

Look after yourself x

Hey, I work in HR and that’s technically illegal? You need file a formal complaint.

its a breach of employee confidentiality.

Woah! That's a massive breach of confidentiality. I'm so sorry about what's happened to you.

omg that’s awful. I’m sorry about your MMC and sorry your boss and made it so much harder for you.

I work in a very small business and she is the business owner.
I am going to bring it up with her when I return to work as I know if I send her an email I'll get a shitty response back whereas face to face she hates confrontation and it will be a smoother conversation.
Thank you for the advice x

That is a massive breach of confidentiality. Health information is "Special Category" under GDPR. You presumably gave the information to your company and consent to process it for reasons of payroll etc but that information should only have been passed on to those who have a legitimate reason eg payroll in order to operate sick pay etc.

Thank you everyone for your condolences.

My colleagues had already started to message me which is how I found out that they had been told. I think I'm just in shock that my boss would share such sensitive news without my go ahead first. (Actually on reflection I'm not surprised, she is a massive gossip)
I'm an open book so probably would have said yes tell them but I'm just angry that she went ahead and told them without checking with me first.

Thank you all for agreeing with my upset

As per others, this is a huge breach of confidentiality. It's hard to get sacked in the public sector but something like that would send you well on your way to it.

I suppose up to you how you want to address given your context, but I'd be putting in a formal complaint to her in writing, to ensure she learns from her actions. If she can't keep things like that confidential what else is she blabbering about?! She needs to tighten up significantly on her HR processes/policy.

Hope you are okay OP.

Your boss needs a shake up to realise this is wrong on so many levels, I can’t begin to imagine how distraught I’d be if that type of info was shared about me. A formal complaint is very much needed, she needs to understand the severity of what she has done.
I’m so sorry this has happened to you, take care xx