Anyone else struggling?

[Bb542]

Hi everyone,

I'm just looking to talk to people in a similar position to me. I'm in my early 30s and have had two miscarriages in a row, both occurring within the last 6 months. My second loss required a D&C as it was a missed miscarriage and I feel like until now I've been coping well. I went on holidays soon after the D&C so I was distracted. However now that I am back in my normal routine and also starting investigations into the recurrent miscarriages, I'm really struggling. I'm finding it so hard to go to work or socialise or do the things I have always done because I feel like I've to put on a brave face and pretend everything is fine. I think I'm only now starting to realise how much I've been through this year. Not only do the losses hurt, but the numerous TV scans, blood tests, doctor's appointments etc have been so draining.
I also recently found out I have low AMH and estrogen levels and even though I shouldn't be too concerned about that and it didn't cause the miscarriages, I can't help but feel worried about it for the future.
Is anyone else going through something similar? I feel like I don't know anyone going through a similar experience to talk to so just thought I'd look here.
I hope you're all ok and I'm so sorry to anyone who has been through something similar xx

Hi, I couldn't read and run...I'm so sorry for your losses. My situation was different but I had a late pregnancy loss in 2021 and struggled for a long time afterwards, and sometimes still do. I would say that pregnancy loss counselling really helped me...I accessed that through a local charity so may be worth investigating. Also I had some counselling through my employer (NHS). My advice would be don't feel like you have to put a brave face on...allow yourself time. Can you be signed off work for a time? I couldn't socialise or anything...I just stayed at home, but tried to focus on eating well, resting well and when I felt up to it short trips out. The miscarriage association also had some useful advice. Take care of yourself xxxx

I’m so sorry you’ve been through this, I’ve also had 2 mc in a row, both needing surgery. I can totally relate when you say about all the scans, blood tests etc, the whole process is just so exhausting.
I was a mess with my first mc, I felt incredibly angry, then I became pregnant again and whilst this also ended in mc I was kind of expecting it as I had spotting early on and just knew in my heart I was going to miscarry, I’ve not been as bad after this one, and I can only assume it’s because it didn’t come as much of a shock. That being said it’s the first thing on my mind when I wake up and last thing before I go to sleep, wondering what might be going on, and I long for the day that isn’t the case. For me I’ve had keep busy or I just end up thinking about it too much, it’s grief at the end of the day and there’s no easy way to navigate it, but I hope you have support around you 💞

Thanks so much for getting back to me and I'm so sorry you've been through loss too. I have been offered counselling through the maternity hospital but I don't feel like I need it, but maybe I do. I think I just have this "why me?" attitude at the moment. But then again, why not me? I feel a little bit better than I did on Friday thankfully so hopefully I'll be ok and get successfully pregnant again soon ❤️

Thanks so much for getting back to me and I'm so sorry you've had two losses too. Sounds like we're in very similar positions. I agree with what you said about it being the first thing you think about in the morning and the last thing at night. So true. My last miscarriage had no bleeding, no signs etc, I just found out at a scan so I feel like that's why I'm finding it so tough. My first one there were signs there like spotting so I could prepare myself more. Hope you're doing ok. Keep in touch and hopefully we'll both have our rainbow babies soon ❤️

Morning Lovely, like the other ladies I couldn't read and run. Iv gone through very similar situations.

Iv had 4 consecutive miscarriages/ chemicals. My first pregnancy ended in MMC at 7 weeks (I was meant to be 9 weeks). The next two I had early losses at 5 weeks and just recently I have had another MMC at 6w 3d. This was in may this year. I had my first D&C in may because they wanted to send the remains onto Leeds for testing. We have just found out that we was having a baby boy and he had trisomy 22 chromosome disorder. We have both had some bloods done to check genetics and are awaiting the results.

To date the drs and consultants have not found a reason for my consecutive miscarriages.

I will be honest I really really struggled after the 2nd and 3rd loss. Iv never had any counselling or anything but talking about it to friends and family does help.

But please know you're not alone. And this forum has been a little bit of a god send for me.

I'm pretty sure we will all get our well deserved rainbow babies 🌈 x

Hi @Bb542 i’m really sorry you are going through this. I’ve a similar story. Early 30s, and 2 losses in a row in the past 9 months.
Both were MMC, and the second one was a partial molar pregnancy. My body doesn’t just bounce back after loss. It’s a long process. I have only just had my second AF since my last loss end of April.

I have my first appointment at recurrent miscarriage clinic end of November. I have been TTC for about 14 months now, and I’m tired

Hi lovely. Thanks so much for your reply and I am so so sorry you've been through so many losses. You are not alone and we're here for you. I really hope that some day soon we will be holding our rainbow babies in our arms. Your little boy will always be with you ❤️

Hi @Figtree11 ❤️ I'm so sorry to hear you've experienced loss as well. It really is so hard and I totally understand when you say you're tired. I really hope the miscarriage clinic helps you find answers go what's been going on. I'm getting miscarriage bloods done privately next week and I really hope it gives some answers. Hopefully some day very soon we'll both have our rainbow babies 🌈❤️ are you still trying at the moment?

I'm so sorry you've gone through so much loss and trauma. You may not realise it, but you have experienced a lot of trauma and from all you've said, my first thought was maybe therapy would help. I recognise your feelings from my own experience and that's why I suggest therapy, if you feel comfortable trying it... wishing you all the best x

Thank you - yes still trying, as my appointment has already been pushed back once, so feel like it could happen again so don’t want to waste time!
Are you actively trying?

Thanks everyone for your kind words and tips/advice. Really appreciate it. Feeling a lot more positive now x