Please or to access all these features

Miscarriage/pregnancy loss

Find support and share your experiences on our Miscarriage forum. See also legal rights and support after baby loss.

Hope after recurrent loss

13 replies

Hopefullyoptimistic2025 · 28/06/2024 12:58

Hi all,

I am a long time lurker but have never posted before!
I swore to myself if I ever got to a point to be optimistic in my TTC journey I would share my story on here to give hope to any other ladies going through recurrent miscarriage- this may be a bit long winded but I really hope it might help someone <3

We started our TTC journey in March of 2023 after I just came off the contraceptive pill. It took some time for this to come out of my system but by June we had fallen pregnant but unfortunately this ended at 5 weeks pregnant. We were devestated but were told 1 miscarriage is actually quite common and it was unlikely to happen again.

We fell pregnant quickly in August and after getting past 5 weeks I started to relax thinking this was our time. I decided to book an early ultrasound at around 10 weeks privately in October. We weren't particularly nervous, more so excited however when we went in the sonographer asked was I sure of my dates as she couldnt see anything on the abdominal ultrasound. She then did an internal ultrasound which should 2 yolk sacs but no fetal poles- she assured my my dates were just wrong and I was only 6 weeks pregnant but I know myself this wasn't possible. I left devestated and within 3 days began bleeding.

Again, we were determined to keep trying but honestly I was after losing hope after 2 miscarriages- we were referred to the recurrent loss clinic but our appointment wasn't until March so we were told to keep trying and if we fell pregnant we would be seen sooner so we did. We fell pregnant in December but once again miscarried in January. I didn't even feel anything for this loss as we weren't excited- we just knew it would happen once we saw the positive test. Unfortunately this miscarriage took 5 weeks to fully leave my system so it brought us up to our referral to the recurrent loss clinic.

During our appointment, the doctors and midwives were absolutely amazing- they ran through our history and told us to carry on trying but this time they gave us a plan. As I had a known blood clotting disorder (all previous pregnancies I was told I wouldn't start heperin until around 8 weeks pregnant) I was started on 400mg of progesterone from 3 dpo and baby aspirin every evening. Once we were to get a positive pregnancy test I would take 100mg eltroxin (I was already on this) in the morning along with 400mg of progesterone twice a day, 1 x heperine injection, 75mg baby aspirin and high dose folic acid.

We got another positive pregnancy test mid April (getting pregnant has never been our issue, its always been holding onto pregnancies) and I was absolutely terrified, I didnt even tell me husband until I was 6 weeks and that was only because he asked me did I want a glass of wine. We didnt really speak about the pregnancy too much however this one immediately felt different (however I thought maybe this was just due to being on the progesterone?) I was constantly nauseous from 5 weeks pregnant and from week 7 I was signed out of work as I physically couldnt get out of bed.

We were brought for an early reassurance scan at 8 weeks and I cannot express the fear I felt- I was convinced there would be no baby. I walked into the appointment and burst out crying. Thankfully the midwife was amazing- got me up on the bed put the dopples straight on my belly and told me within 5 seconds there was a healthy strong heartbeat. She actually had to stop the scan as I was crying so heavily she couldn't keep the doppler on my tummy! We had never seen a heartbeat before.

We were told to come at 10 weeks (just to reassure us, not because anything looked wrong) and once again I was filled with dread. There was no way I was going to get another good scan- but low and behold the exact same thing happened (I started to cry, they scanned me immediately and baby had a beautiful heart beat). We were measuring right on track!

Finally we were discharged from the early pregnancy unit and were given our dating scan in the maternity hospital for when we were almost 13 weeks pregnant.
I spent the entire 3 week gap googling "good 10 week scan but terrified for 12 week scan" to see so many women going through the same fear as me- unless you've been through losses I don't think you will ever understand how terrifying being scanned is.

We went for our scan and once again, the midwife was an angel. Straight up on the bed, doppler on belly and withn 5 seconds said "gorgeous strong heartbeat and your baby has the hiccups"! I burst out crying (you can probably see a theme here) and she reassured me everything was perfect so she was just going to be quiet for a little while to get all the measurements but nothing at all was wrong.

Baby was measuring exactly on track and she actually struggled to get the measurements as they kept hiccupping and wiggling but she got them in the end!

I know we aren't out of the woods yet and I am obviously so terrified still of anything going wrong but being out of the first trimester is such a relief.

Anyway, if any of you managed to read this far, I really hope this may give some hope to my fellow recurrent loss pals. I know my journey hasn't been the longest and some people are dealing with these losses for years on end so I cannot imagine how hard that must be but I do firmly believe I would not be in such a priveledged position without the help of the variation of different drugs given to me by the recurrent loss clinic.

I wish you all the absolute best with your journeys and truly hope any woman going through anything similiar can find hope and the motivation to keep going for what we all so desperately want - sending you all so much love <3

OP posts:
Figtree11 · 28/06/2024 14:34

@Hopefullyoptimistic2025 that is so lovely to read of your good news. Sending a big congrats!
I have been TTC since June 2023, and in that time had a loss at 10wks in November, and then one at 12wks in April. Both found out at scans, so I too am petrified of ever having a scan again.
My second loss was a partial molar so I am being monitored by a specialised centre but hoping I can be discharged soon. I also have an appt in November at miscarriage clinic but will TTC in the meantime. I am desperate to be pregnant but utterly terrified. At the moment, having a baby feels like a pipe dream so it is so lovely to read everything is going well. Wishing you well for the rest of your pregnancy!

Hopefullyoptimistic2025 · 28/06/2024 14:40

Hi @Figtree11

Firstly, can I just say I am truly so so sorry you are going through this. It is honestly something I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy and I know exactly how you are feeling.

That must have been so hard to get so far into the first trimester and lose 2 pregnancies, I really hope you are mentally doing well after that ❤

The fear of scans is so real, I don't think I will ever not be terrified of them. I have another scan at 16 weeks and I am already dreading it!

If anything I ask is too personal or sensitive please just ignore me but its just nice to talk to people who understand.

Has the specialist clinic given you any indication of medication you might be able to take in your next pregnancy to help you? And may I ask, how come you need to be monitored after a partial molar pregnancy? I wouldn't have too much knowledge on those so again if anything I ask is too personal please just ignore ❤

OP posts:
Figtree11 · 28/06/2024 15:07

@Hopefullyoptimistic2025 thank you, I don’t mind you asking at all 😊 It’s good to chat to people who understand.
When do you have your 16 week scan?

I have been struggling recently so reached out to the counsellor at my EPU so have 8 sessions with her coming up which I’m hoping will bring me out the negative space im in at the minute.

A partial molar has to be monitored as the placenta is abnormal, and in 1% of cases can turn into cancer. So anyone who gets diagnosed with it has to be monitored to ensure cancer doesn’t occur. So once they have done the monitoring and fingers crossed I’m clear, then that’s it. So I don’t think they have any recommendations for future pregnancies as it’s meant to be a rare thing. Does increase my chances of it happening again though.

So unfortunately I just have to keep trying & hope next time it works out ok. But if it doesn’t, I have the appointment in November to discuss how I can get help. Seems such a long way away though!

TheBirdintheCave · 28/06/2024 20:05

@Hopefullyoptimistic2025 I've been where you are too. Three miscarriages between November 2021 to August 2023. The third loss was IVF which we chose to go for as we were told we wouldn't be referred to the recurrent miscarriage clinic until three losses.

Miraculously I got pregnant naturally last August and my daughter was born in May 🥰

No cause was ever found for my miscarriages but, interestingly, I put myself on progesterone (that I had left over) from 3dpo on the cycle we got pregnant (after I read a study about it) so I think that may have helped!

The scan nerves DO fade eventually, once you can feel baby moving it really helps! I cried at all my scans up until 20 weeks.

Congratulations! I have everything crossed that this is your one and you're holding your own bundle in a few months time!

herewegoagain123456 · 01/07/2024 07:32

So nice to hear a successful story 😍

I think I am currently going through my 4th missed miscarriage and the waiting around for 2 weeks is going to kill me I know.
Went for a scan yesterday and there was a yolk sac and that's it. But all symptoms have gone since then so I feel in 2 weeks there's going to be no heartbeat.
I'm taking progesterone but think I started taking it too late as my doctors never told me and my recurrent miscarriage appointment got cancelled so really have no clue to why this is happening.

All I know is it sucks

Hopefullyoptimistic2025 · 01/07/2024 08:32

@Figtree11 My 16 week scan is in around 3 weeks time so not too long in between appointments thankfully!
Oh my God, I am so sorry- as if going through a miscarriage isn't hard enough without having that fear along with it. I'm honestly so so sorry you're going through this right now, I really hope those sessions will help bring you into a better headspace but I completely understand why you feel so down. Its terrible having to wait so long for the appointment with the reccurent loss clinic- I really hope they give you an amazing plan in November, you truly deserve it after everything you've been through ❤

OP posts:
Hopefullyoptimistic2025 · 01/07/2024 08:34

@TheBirdintheCave Thank you so much for your lovely message- its wonderful to hear other ladies success stories especially after experiencing so much loss. I am absolutely thrilled to hear about your miraculous little girl- you must be so besotted with her 😍
And thank you for the reassuring words about the scans- I never thought about once I can feel movement it would be so helpful, you have made me so excited for the weeks to come 💓

OP posts:
Hopefullyoptimistic2025 · 01/07/2024 08:38

@herewegoagain123456 Can I just say, I am truly so sorry for your previous losses and the stress you are feeling waiting around to find out about this pregnancy ❤
Do you think maybe you could have just been very early for your scan and this is why there was just a yolk sac? I completely understand how scared and fed up you must be feeling, it truly is the worst wait possible :(

Did they reschedule your recurrent loss appointment at all for you? If you ever feel like you need someone to talk to, please do not hesitate to send me a message- I understand how lonely this time can be.

OP posts:
Figtree11 · 03/07/2024 11:58

Hopefullyoptimistic2025 · 01/07/2024 08:32

@Figtree11 My 16 week scan is in around 3 weeks time so not too long in between appointments thankfully!
Oh my God, I am so sorry- as if going through a miscarriage isn't hard enough without having that fear along with it. I'm honestly so so sorry you're going through this right now, I really hope those sessions will help bring you into a better headspace but I completely understand why you feel so down. Its terrible having to wait so long for the appointment with the reccurent loss clinic- I really hope they give you an amazing plan in November, you truly deserve it after everything you've been through ❤

I hope everything is perfect at your 16 weeks scan 😊
Ahh thank you so much. I just wish I could get on with TTC again now. 9 weeks post d&c and still no period. Really hoping I get signed off from the molar clinic to try again by next week. But just wish my period would show up!

herewegoagain123456 · 03/07/2024 14:25

The torturous waiting game

Pinkieblue24 · 04/07/2024 14:18

@Hopefullyoptimistic2025 Firstly many congratulations on your current pregnancy 🩷🩷& so sorry for your losses. This gives me so much hope!!

We Started TTC March 2023, first mc in June 2023 (like yourself) and then took us a while to get pregnant again, 2nd pregnancy March 2024 & 2nd mc May 2024. Both times we miscarried at 6 weeks. The second time we got to see baby at 6 weeks but didnt find out baby had passed until what was supposed to be 10 weeks but think they passed just a few days after the 6 week scan. I have been referred to MC clinic & have been given a telephone appointment for beginning of August. I am petrified of falling pregnant again as I dont want to miscarry again however want a baby so much that I am willing to risk it.

How helpful were the MC clinic & what can I expect from my first telephone appointment? Do they do extensive testing?? I have had normal bloodwork from my GP and an internal ultrasound to check everything was okay in Feb 2024 (found out a month later i was pregnant) and they said everything was fine.
if i do get pregnant during testing will they help support the pregnancy? If i was to go on and have more children would they offer support & would i be under their care?

i am going to ask these questions on my telephone appointment however would love to hear your experience and what to expect 🩷🩷

Hopefullyoptimistic2025 · 04/07/2024 16:27

@Pinkieblue24 can I just start by saying I am truly so so sorry for your losses ❤️ our situations sound incredibly similiar so I completely understand how you must be feeling right now 💔

The recurrent loss clinic were honestly my saving Grace- I cannot explain how lovely they all were, so sympathetic and made sure I left with every answer I wanted. The first appointment, they just run through your history along with asking some medical questions and lifestyle questions- they honestly couldn’t be kinder so don’t be worried for this ❤️
The testing they did on me was for things like my thyroid, other blood clotting, vitamin d deficiency’s etc
all of my blood work came back perfect (the blood disorder I have isn’t tested and I knew about this before getting pregnant and the dose I was on for my thyroid previously was correct so no issues) so I was told we had unexplain recurrent loss- but this didn’t stop them from doing everything to try and make sure I had a healthy pregnancy.

What I will say, is until I had my first appointment they weren’t too helpful- when I got pregnant in January there was no talks of me coming in earlier or starting any of the medications? So personally if I was going through it again, I would have waited for my appointment.

I really hope my answers might help you a little and you get comfort and support from your upcoming appointment - if you ever want to chat please feel free to message me ❤️

OP posts:
Pinkieblue24 · 04/07/2024 17:06

@Hopefullyoptimistic2025 thank you for sharing your experiences! Honestly, some days are really hard to get through and see the positives however your post has given me so much hope🩷🩷 wishing you & baby a healthy journey & easy delivery🩷

New posts on this thread. Refresh page