Missed miscarriage

[QueenN]

Long post- I’m so upset and angry right now and just need somewhere to vent. I found out a week ago that my baby had stopped at 9w3d and I went to EPU on tues to arrange inpatient medical management. I was referred to another hospital as mine don’t offer inpatient, and was booked to go in today. I started bleeding lightly yesterday so phoned and was brought in to assessment, only to be sent home and told they would phone me if bed became available.
I then had to phone last night because I had some more bleeding and a few clots, still no bed. Phoned this morning as scheduled and again no bed. I feel so let down, angry, upset and extremely anxious. They keep telling me I can’t be at home as I’m at risk of heavy blood loss and but then they’re just leaving me. I’m so scared of miscarrying at home alone and they just don’t seem to care, I will be making a formal complaint once I feel better.

So sorry to hear this, I had a similar situation. You can go to any epu at any hospital - are there any others near you that you could phone? I ended up contacting 4 before finding one I could go to. Appreciate you just need to move quickly though, can the epu you were scheduled to go to not give you a time of when they can take you? X

Hi, I just wanted to say I’m so sorry for what you are going through. I also found out (during my 12 week scan) a week ago today that I had a missed miscarriage. The turmoil after is a nightmare and I’m sorry you have not been adequately taken care off, you have every right to be cross. I’m sorry I don’t have too much advice, I just wanted to reach out and say I’m sorry and I’m thinking of you <3

Thank you for replying. I ended up miscarrying at home all alone, for the hospital to then tell me they now had a bed available 🤬 I had to be admitted as I had lost so much blood, nearly required blood transfusion. The whole experience has been so traumatic, made worse by not receiving the proper care.
Im home now recovering and will be making a formal complaint once I feel better.

Thinking of anyone that’s been through or is currently going through this.

So sorry to hear this, I did end up requiring a blood transfusion when this happened to me (I wonder how common this is??) - hope you are recovering physically okay.

So sorry that you didn’t receive the proper care and a complaint sounds like a good idea when you are feeling up to it x

I think it may be more common than we realise 😏 they didn’t even do a blood test until the following day, even though I passed out a few times.
I'm recovering well just feeling very tired and a bit sore.
Did you experience stomach muscle pains afterwards? I feel like I’ve been battered or had a really hard session at the gym.
The nightmares and flashbacks are awful at the moment, I’m hoping in time they will stop. They did offer a call with bereavement nurse but I refused as I don’t see what good it would do.

@QueenN im so sorry to read this update :( it sounds like you’ve had a truly horrific time on top of the original pain a missed miscarriage brings anyway. Agree that making a complaint is a good idea, maybe it will avoid this happening to someone else in the future. Thinking of you and best of luck with your recovery. X

So sorry you have gone through this. I had surgical management for a mmc at 11 weeks after a normal scan at 10 weeks. I think I definitely had some element of ptsd afterwards (I just kept reliving the moment I was told the embryo wasn’t viable over and over again for weeks). It did get better over time. It’s so horrible just wanted to send you some solidarity hope you are recovering ok xxx

In the end I had to have emergency surgery as it was the only way to stop the bleeding. I did feel very battered and bruised for a few days but thankfully did get better fairly quickly after that and I hope you do too. Everywhere seems to operate things slightly differently - I wasn’t offered a bereavement nurse but maybe that’s something you could think about down the line. I don’t think I would have opted for that at the time but maybe a few weeks later it would have been nice to speak to someone. I’m not sure if your hospital offers a follow up scan, mine didn’t but I paid for one a few weeks later and found that helpful. I hope your recovery is going okay, it’s such a traumatic thing to go through x

That must have been so scary for you. I’m not sure if they offer the bereavement to everyone or if it’s because I delivered my baby and the trauma of everything that happened. It was all very strange, even though baby was so small they wrapped them in a blanket/basket and we had to decide if we wanted cremation or burial at home or hospital. It was very surreal and hard to deal with, but nice that they are acknowledged too. They don’t do a follow up scan just told me to take pregnancy test in 3 weeks to make sure nothing is retained, which with the amount I lost I’ll be very surprised if there is x