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Miscarriage/pregnancy loss

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TW...Menopausal and no children

1 reply

Windypants21 · 28/04/2024 17:37

If this thread causes anyone any upset please have it taken down.

I am late 50s as is my friend. I am single but have never really been broody. I am relatively happy with my lot in life in this regard, but my friend who is married with no children is not. I knew she had always wanted children but after having a chat with her today she has revealed it is a near all consuming upetting regret. She married in her late 30s, had issues conceiving, had a failed IVF and then due to other health issues this interfered with her ability to have further IVF. She seems to be regretting not pursuing more IVF after her health improved as she felt she was too old to try again but looking back feels she should have carried on trying.

She feels that as she is childless she has missed out on so much and suffers enormously from watching friends and relatives with children. Her husband was older when they married, he had been previously married with children but his wife passed away. UnfortunatelHenlow he doesn't totally understand how upset she is.

We have had a long chat today, I didnt realise it was so all consuming and upsetting for her. We talked about the possibility of speaking to someone ( as I am utterly useless as to how I can advise or help). She works with children already and we discussed the possibility of short term fostering (adoption is not an option for other reasons). I really feel for her, I feel a bit helpless and maybe i am being a bit trite to say to speak to someone...but she did seem open to the idea.

Has anyone else any experience of this? Or advice that they can offer?

It hasn't escaped my notice this is 'mumsnet' but it is a female dominated forum so hoping some real life experience of this will help.

I have no desire to cause upset for anyone going through similar so if it is too much please do get the thread deleted.

OP posts:
findingnibbles · 10/04/2025 13:16

Sorry you didn’t get any replies to this OP. I don’t have any advice or experience myself, but what a thoughtful friend you are. You might get some more traffic posting one of the other boards (although appreciate this is not a recent post)

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