First pregnancy ending in loss at 37 - how to have hope?

[Orlahoping]

I am REALLY struggling with feeling like I have left it too late and will never conceive again/keep having miscarriages. I am autistic and have health anxiety and am really struggling to manage intrusive thoughts about never becoming a mum. I know my situation is nowhere near as bad as others as I am only one loss in and I know 37 isn't hugely old, but in the absence of other evidence I just feel hopeless. TTCing was a nightmare mentally for me (it took 5 cycles which I realise is also not too long) and I hate that I am back here again.

I am just ranting really, want it off my chest. I am terrified, and still so sad about losing our baby

[ReetPetity]

I'm so sorry for your loss. It's a big thing to process, whatever the circumstances. I understand your fears. I had many of the same when I was TTC my second at 37. We had a rocky road, and I have been where you are - fearing that I was too old, that it wouldn't happen, and I was already in the very privileged position of having a child. Many women have successful pregnancies at 37 (and later - I did). Many women also have successful pregnancies after loss, as I did. There's every chance you'll go onto to have the baby you hope for too. Wishing you all the best

[Orlahoping]

@ReetPetity thank you for your reply and the reassurance. I am finding it awfully hard to hold onto what is probably the overwhelming likelihood that everything will be ok!

[UseItOrloseItt]

Sorry for your loss op.

First pregnancy miscarriages are so common but there's every chance of a better outcome with another pregnancy.

From personal experience, my first pregnancy ended in miscarriage at 9 weeks. I've gone on to have three further pregnancies after that and have 3 dc, no further miscarriages.

You have years ahead of you in which to become pregnant again so try and stay positive xx

[Orlahoping]

@UseItOrloseItt thank you. Lots of people have said to me that MC is more common in a first pregnancy. Can't find any data to back it up but there must be some truth in it because of all the anecdotes!

[Lotsandlotsofplants]

@Orlahoping
I also had a miscarriage at 37, but went on to successfully conceive again at 37 and also at 38. 😊

[Wannabeamummybad]

I'm sorry to hear of your loss. It's such a tough time and I'm sending my best wishes. I miscarried at 37 years old, last year. Similar circumstances to yours. I felt devastated and hopeless and worried I'd left it too late too. I'm now 7 months pregnant (we did IVF this time around) and thankfully this time things seem to be working out (fingers crossed). I just want to give you hope because I know the aftermath of a miscarriage can be so devastating. Take good care of yourself. x

[Cinai]

So sorry, it’s tough. I lost my first pregnancy at 40 and thought that was it. However, I fell pregnant again immediately. Now 15 weeks. Don’t give up hope!

[Orlahoping]

@Wannabeamummybad and @Cinai thank you for sharing your positive stories. I hope the rest of your pregnancies go smoothly!

It really helps to know it's a relatively common, although shit experience. 💓