First pregnancy ending in loss at 37 - how to have hope?

[Orlahoping]

I am REALLY struggling with feeling like I have left it too late and will never conceive again/keep having miscarriages. I am autistic and have health anxiety and am really struggling to manage intrusive thoughts about never becoming a mum. I know my situation is nowhere near as bad as others as I am only one loss in and I know 37 isn't hugely old, but in the absence of other evidence I just feel hopeless. TTCing was a nightmare mentally for me (it took 5 cycles which I realise is also not too long) and I hate that I am back here again.

I am just ranting really, want it off my chest. I am terrified, and still so sad about losing our baby

I'm so sorry for your loss. It's a big thing to process, whatever the circumstances. I understand your fears. I had many of the same when I was TTC my second at 37. We had a rocky road, and I have been where you are - fearing that I was too old, that it wouldn't happen, and I was already in the very privileged position of having a child. Many women have successful pregnancies at 37 (and later - I did). Many women also have successful pregnancies after loss, as I did. There's every chance you'll go onto to have the baby you hope for too. Wishing you all the best

@ReetPetity thank you for your reply and the reassurance. I am finding it awfully hard to hold onto what is probably the overwhelming likelihood that everything will be ok!

Sorry for your loss op.

First pregnancy miscarriages are so common but there's every chance of a better outcome with another pregnancy.

From personal experience, my first pregnancy ended in miscarriage at 9 weeks. I've gone on to have three further pregnancies after that and have 3 dc, no further miscarriages.

You have years ahead of you in which to become pregnant again so try and stay positive xx

@UseItOrloseItt thank you. Lots of people have said to me that MC is more common in a first pregnancy. Can't find any data to back it up but there must be some truth in it because of all the anecdotes!

@Orlahoping
I also had a miscarriage at 37, but went on to successfully conceive again at 37 and also at 38. 😊

I'm sorry to hear of your loss. It's such a tough time and I'm sending my best wishes. I miscarried at 37 years old, last year. Similar circumstances to yours. I felt devastated and hopeless and worried I'd left it too late too. I'm now 7 months pregnant (we did IVF this time around) and thankfully this time things seem to be working out (fingers crossed). I just want to give you hope because I know the aftermath of a miscarriage can be so devastating. Take good care of yourself. x

So sorry, it’s tough. I lost my first pregnancy at 40 and thought that was it. However, I fell pregnant again immediately. Now 15 weeks. Don’t give up hope!

@Wannabeamummybad and @Cinai thank you for sharing your positive stories. I hope the rest of your pregnancies go smoothly!

It really helps to know it's a relatively common, although shit experience. 💓