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Miscarriage/pregnancy loss

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Original poster

Missed miscarriage?

11 replies

MisssMarion · 08/03/2024 21:33

I don't know what to believe anymore. I am supposed to be 8+3 weeks pregnant based on my last period. I ovulated on days 13-14 based on my ovulation tests (peak days) and had my first positive pregnancy test on day 25. I'm 100% sure of my dates. I had an early scan on Tuesday at 8 weeks and they couldn't find a heartbeat and measured the foetus at 6 weeks. I went to the EPU on Thursday where they couldn't find a heartbeat either and measured 5 weeks. This means I got pregnant the day I tested positive which makes no sense.

I have zero miscarriage symptoms and still strong pregnancy symptoms. This would mean I'm having a missed miscarriage. The EPU want to wait a week to do another scan before talking next steps and I don't understand why. What could really happen in a week? How could the dates be so far off?

OP posts:
Hollycharlie · 08/03/2024 21:45

hi @MisssMarion I’m sorry you’re going through this. It’s just awful. They want to make sure you’re not wrong with your dates but from my experience I was not wrong and I miscarried before the next scan. It’s just so awful and totally unexpected if you’d never heard of this before. I was meant to be 11 weeks and measured 6 by a private scan and just over 5 by epu. I was in denial until the bleeding started a few days later. I’m so sorry you’re going through this. It’s just awful xx

jellyfish2 · 08/03/2024 22:02

I'm so sorry it really is awful. Agree with the poster above, they want to make sure the dates aren't off. I was supposed to be 12 weeks pregnant and found out I had a missed miscarriage at my scan - baby stopped growing at 8 weeks. It is so awful as I had all the pregnancy symptoms too so it makes it hard to believe.

Original poster
MisssMarion · 09/03/2024 13:01

@Hollycharlie @jellyfish2 thank you both. Tbh I understood what had happened the minute we didn't hear the heartbeat at the private scan and I have no hope anything is going to change now as my dates are correct. I find it quite cruel though to make me wait a week when we all know it's over and I'm sick everyday... my body seems to have zero intention of letting go 😞

OP posts:
jellyfish2 · 09/03/2024 13:11

I think it's because you are still early they wouldn't take the chance. So for me the reason I didn't need to wait is because I was 12 weeks and at 8 weeks there should be a heartbeat, it was clear I wasn't off with my dates at all. I started questioning they maybe missed the heartbeat that they somehow got it wrong etc which you might end up doing - I was just in shock. At least this way you'll know for sure but I know it does feel cruel when you're in the midst of it all.

UrsulaSings123 · 09/03/2024 13:41

I had to have 4 scans and wait 3 weeks until they would confirm it as a miscarriage. I even looked once at abortion options because I knew it was a miscarriage and I couldn't bear waiting the length of time I did in the end. I couldn't do it though because obviously it wasn't what I wanted.

So sorry you're going through this, I found the waiting between scans the worst. I'd already had 3 weeks before they called it so felt like I'd done a lot of my grieving beforehand.

Original poster
MisssMarion · 11/03/2024 10:16

Thank you @Hollycharlie @jellyfish2 @UrsulaSings123 for sharing your experience.
I didn't have a good experience at my local hospital so I've booked with a private hospital as I'm lucky my insurance is covering for it. I'm booked for a D&C as they don't do MVA, but I also asked for a scan beforehand to confirm one last time. I'm sure of my dates but the EPU got me nervous. I'm still feeling so nauseous I want to get it over with!

OP posts:
Caneloalvarez · 11/03/2024 10:28

@MisssMarion so sorry to hear you are going through this, I have been there and the first time is shocking along with feeling like you are learning all about this medical situation you had no clue about and did not want to know about!

I think they have to be careful in case they make a mistake but it does sound (from your description) that there isn't a viable pregnancy there. I too had dreadful nausea and it all felt so unfair. I pushed for anti sickness meds for the wait between scans as I was so miserable and they did help a bit - Ondansetron was better that Cyclizine. I figured that if they'd made a mistake then the meds are still safe to take. And if it was all over then at least I am doing something about the dreadful nausea.

Hang in there, you will get through this, sending hugs xxx

Caneloalvarez · 11/03/2024 10:33

Also I'd defo push for anti nausea meds the morning of the D&C. I found having to fast with the nausea really unbearable (that was during my first D&C, I've had two). It sounds like you have a good plan in place with the private hospital, the final scan will reassure you that it's the right thing and the nurses will be lovely and quite frankly it's a relief to be put under and then have a rest after everything. I remember sobbing on the morning talking to the anaesthetist and he just said 'this has to be done, it's the right thing for your health' and it really helped to hear those words. It will be done, and you'll be ok after some time has passed xxx

RWSS · 11/03/2024 22:20

I found out today I've had a missed miscarriage. I'm 8 weeks today, have had alot of issues with my pregnancy so have had scan at epu at 6 weeks- they found heartbeat.
I had slight spotting. Went for a private scan today. No heartbeat, they date me as 6 weeks. I have to call epu to get them to scan me.
I hope I don't have a long wait before I can miscarry.
I'm gutted. It's my second miscarriage. I really thought after all the issues I had overcome already, this baby would have made it.
I pray it gets easier for us x

Original poster
MisssMarion · 13/03/2024 09:49

Caneloalvarez · 11/03/2024 10:33

Also I'd defo push for anti nausea meds the morning of the D&C. I found having to fast with the nausea really unbearable (that was during my first D&C, I've had two). It sounds like you have a good plan in place with the private hospital, the final scan will reassure you that it's the right thing and the nurses will be lovely and quite frankly it's a relief to be put under and then have a rest after everything. I remember sobbing on the morning talking to the anaesthetist and he just said 'this has to be done, it's the right thing for your health' and it really helped to hear those words. It will be done, and you'll be ok after some time has passed xxx

Thanks a lot for your advice. I managed to get some ondansetron. It's funny when you say the word 'miscarriage' people suddenly give you whatever you ask...
I'm very sad this morning and can't believe it's happening and also it's happening this way... I wish I had a natural miscarriage at 6 weeks when it ended, the last 3 weeks were unnecessary torture.
Anyway, I'm looking forward to tomorrow now.

OP posts:
Caneloalvarez · 14/03/2024 06:19

@MisssMarion wishing you all the ‘best’ for today (doesn’t seem right saying that but I hope you know what I mean!) it’s an awful lead up to the procedure, you feel unwell with symptoms and your hormones are also haywire.

You’re absolutely right, those few weeks feel like an unnecessary torture, I was very annoyed with my body!! But go easy on yourself, our bodies are a bit glitchy and sometimes get things wrong but try their best. This one wasn’t meant to be for whatever reason but there will be more chances.

Glad you got the ondansetron, I hope it helped. I found that after a few days I felt a little more grounded and accepting as the hormones settled down, even though it is overall a stressful and upsetting experience. Once my cycle regulated I felt stronger again and it all starts to feel a little easier.

I’m sure the staff will be lovely today and you’ll be home before you know it. Sending you a handhold and still here if you want to chat. Xxx

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